Oktoberfest... no beer goggles needed here / file
Posted on 11/26/2005 6:47:02 AM PST by yankeedame
Boffins crack beer goggles
From: By Nick Buchan
November 25, 2005
SCIENTISTS have figured out why alcohol makes ugly people seem more attractive - otherwise known as the "beer goggles" effect.
Far from being a simple matter of how much you have to drink, the researchers have devised a complex formula which takes into account the level of light in the pub or club, the drinkers' own eyesight, the smokiness of the room and the distance between two people. A phenomenon which has caught out millions of people over the years, the beer goggles effect refers to how having too much to drink can make someone you find repulsive suddenly exude all the charms and allure of a supermodel.
While getting intimate with the person may seem like a good idea at the time, it's only the morning after when you realise that the Angelina Jolie superbabe you hooked up with the night before actually resembles Margaret Thatcher in the cold harsh light of day.
And while many of us have worn beer goggles over the years, no-one has ever worked out exactly why alcohol has this strange effect on our judgement.
Until now.
"The beer goggles effect isn't solely dependent on how much alcohol a person consumes, there are other influencing factors at play too," said Professor Nathan Efron, Professor of Clinical Optometry at the University of Manchester. Amazingly, scientists now believe you don't even need to have had an alcoholic drink to suffer from the beer goggles effect.
"The formula shows for example, that a person with poor vision who's talking to someone in a very smoky bar will be experiencing a beer goggles effect close to someone who has consumed eight pints in a smoke-free and well-lit room."
The formula can work out a final score to measure the effect.
A score of less than 1 means no beer goggle effect - an ugly person remains ugly.
A score of 1-50 means a slight beer goggle effect - making a person you would normally find very unattractive slightly less "visually offensive".
A moderate beer goggle effect is indicated by a score of between 50-100- a person who is by no means appealing becomes suddenly sexually attractive.
A score of more than 100 indicates a severe beer goggle effect - the "fugly" you were talking to an hour ago now looks like Kylie Minogue or George Clooney. For example, someone with normal vision who has drunk five pints of beer and see someone 1.5 metres away in a fairly smoky and poorly lit room will score 55, which means that they would suffer from a moderate beer goggle effect.
Increasing beer consumption to eight pints (2.8 litres) increases that score of 140, leading to a severe beer goggle effect.''
The research was carried out by an eyewear firm, which surveyed more than 1000 members of a speed dating club.
The poll showed 68 per cent of respondents had woken up the next morning regretting giving their number to somebody who they later realised they weren't attracted to.
So that's how they get that big. You just soak them in beer foam. Cool.
How many research papers include the word 'fugly' in them...
Probably about the same number as research papers on "beer goggles".
She left him broke, in his new truck He don’t smoke, but he lights one up Temporary fix, for his heartache He’s hurting bad, but he’s feeling great
He’s on the dance floor yelling Freebird Singing off pitch but he knows every word Grabs him a girl and he holds on tight He’s chasing everything in sight He’ll fall apart when he gets home But right now his worries are gone Life looks good, good, good Billy’s got his beer goggles on Hey!
Lot of drunks, get real mean They’ll pick a fight, over anything Billy wants to laugh, that’s why he’s here You won’t see him cry, unless you spill his beer
He’s on the dance floor yelling Freebird Singing off pitch but he knows every word Grabs him another girl and he holds on tight Now he’s chasing everything in sight He’ll fall apart when he gets home Right now his worries are gone Life looks good, good, good Billy’s got his beer goggles……. on
He’s on the dance floor yelling Freebird Singing off pitch but he knows every word Grabs him another girl he hold on tight He don’t see ugly Through blood shot eyes He’ll fall apart when he gets home But right now his worries are gone Cause life looks good, good, good So good, good, good, Life looks good, good, good Billy’s got his beer goggles…….on
Click here to listen.
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It's NOT the beer's fault!
people sue mcdonalds cause fast food makes them fat..people sue tobacco companies because smoking gives them cancer..can I sue budweiser because they make ugly people look pretty???
this is america..surely you don't insinuate personal responsibility has anything to do with this, do ya?? (sarc/off)
Wille Nelson:
Last night I came in at two with a ten
But at ten I woke up with a two
I got twenty-twenty vision when I ain't drinkin'
But Lord when I get on that booze
I ain't never gone to bed with an ugly woman
But I sure woke up with a few
Last night I came in at two with a ten
But at ten I woke up with a two
29Who hath woe? who hath sorrow? who hath contentions? who hath babbling? who hath wounds without cause? who hath redness of eyes?
30They that tarry long at the wine; they that go to seek mixed wine.
31Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when it giveth his colour in the cup, when it moveth itself aright.
32At the last it biteth like a serpent, and stingeth like an adder.
33Thine eyes shall behold strange women, and thine heart shall utter perverse things.
34Yea, thou shalt be as he that lieth down in the midst of the sea, or as he that lieth upon the top of a mast.
35They have stricken me, shalt thou say, and I was not sick; they have beaten me, and I felt it not: when shall I awake? I will seek it yet again.
I want to be paid for my research....
Hey, somebody has to do it.
Do you realize what would happen to the brewers if the product liability lawyers latched onto this issue?
A biblical reference to beer goggles.
Cool.
In the words of the late, great Brother Dave Gardner...."The worst I ever had was wonderful"
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