Sasha Is Dead, but Why? (the choking game)

Los Angeles Times ^ | November 18, 2005 | Sandy Banks

[Cincinatus' Wife]

............................ a boy took up the banner: "How are we supposed to know what's dangerous? I never even heard of this game. Aren't our parents supposed to warn us?"

A father stood and clutched the back of a pew, trying to control his voice. "I am so shocked by what I've learned about this community of kids," he said.

..."Take the mask off," shouted one mother, whose own outspoken 14-year-old daughter often seems to be at the center of trouble. "Parents need to accept that our kids have issues. Stop pointing the finger at everyone else's kids."

....But blame was bouncing back and forth: The children should have been brave enough to tell. The adults should have been more attentive.

Parents who aren't willing to police their kids get what they deserve, implied one mother. Her son never goes to anyone's home unless she talks to the other parents. She stays on top of what he's doing.

...."I talked to Sasha all the time," Rob Sepasi told us in a steady voice. "I have great communication with my daughter. She wasn't keeping anything from me." He turned toward her best friends and called out their names. "You spent all summer with her," he said. If they had told what she was doing, he suggested, "Sasha would still be here."

One girl's head dropped and her sobs pierced the silence. A boy drew back, his eyes flashing anger. But they were no match for the emotion of a grieving father.

.....Children shifted uneasily in their seats. Next to me, two young girls gripped each other's hands so tightly, I could feel their elbows trembling.

"Talk to your parents," he pleaded with the kids, his voice edgy, harsh and rising. "Talk to your parents!" He was shouting now. "TALK TO YOUR PARENTS!"...........

[Cincinatus' Wife]

As explained in the article:

***Children play the game by compressing the carotid arteries in their necks, reducing blood flow and oxygen to the brain. That produces a momentary loss of consciousness, preceded by lightheadedness. When they release the pressure, a surge of pent-up blood flows to the brain, creating a euphoric rush.

They do it in groups, at parties, at sleepovers, in school locker rooms and in lavatories. But they've added a dangerous element to a game some of their parents played as children. Now instead of just squeezing one another, they wrap belts, ropes, ties, dog leashes, even bicycle chains around their necks to produce the fainting sensation.***

[KateatRFM]

When we allow children to have everything available in life by the time they're 18, and never demand that they wait more than 13 seconds for any goodie, any gift, any experience that they want -- and we want to experience through them in our desperate desire to pretend we are still young -- then they're going to reach farther and farther for new experiences that they are incapable because of age and experience of realizing are deadly.

I don't know why people are surprised that more and more lives are ruined by the age of 18. We're dumping the kids into the Niagara River and telling them to swim -- and then we wring our hands when they're swept over the Falls.

[Cincinatus' Wife]

Toward the end the author writes:

***Now, I look at my daughter, almost 15, and wonder about her private life — the hours she spends alone in her room, the new friends she's making at public school, the secrets she spills only to her journal. I could clamp down, bombard her with questions, scour the websites she visits for hidden hazards. But what would that accomplish?***

[upier]

Stupidity is self correcting.

[dakine]

Psycho-babble...

[gitmo]

I have talked to my kids about drugs, sexual molestation, kidnapping, alcohol, cigarettes, shoplifting, talking to strangers, internet safety, answering the doorbell, answering the telephone. I never once have talked to them about not hanging themselves for the fun of it. Note to self.

[Cincinatus' Wife]

I'd heard about this as a sexual high but I had not heard of this.

[KateatRFM]

We can give them some idea that the future is worth sticking around for and that there's a lot to look forward to in life, and that non matter what you think before you turn 18, there are many more important things in life than being popular and 'cool'. Then show them what some of those things are.

[DainBramage]

The same effect as the results of a police choke hold. Cut off the blood for 4-5 seconds and you drop like a rock.

Of course its almost illegal to use in most communities due to death.

[Falcon4.0]

Kinda makes you long for the days when all they did was huff glue.

[tonycavanagh]

This game has been around in many guises, I played a similar game almost 40 years ago, we were convinced that when u blacked out if someone was telling you something it would come true. Such as you have the strength of the incredible hulk

[jocon307]

"I never once have talked to them about not hanging themselves for the fun of it. Note to self."

Right, me too. My daughter will probably think I'm a wack-o, but Mommy is going to tell her: don't be choking yourself, and don't let anyone else choke you either; and wear a jacket, it's getting colder.

[dawn53]

I'm in my 50's and way back, in the dark ages, when I was in high school, there was something kids used to do to "pass out"...I think it was hyperventilating.

I really don't think this "choking game" is that new, been around for quite a few years.

I just think more kids might be participating now, thus resulting in more deaths and awareness.

[gridlock]

I never once have talked to them about not hanging themselves for the fun of it. Note to self.

Make sure you read than note later, and act on it. This is not as uncommon as some parents might think. If your child is not doing it, he or she probably knows somebody who is.

And there is a sexual aspect to it all as well, just to make it even more uncomfortable. But nobody ever said being a parent was easy. Becoming a parent is (usually) easy. Being a parent is work.

[Maceman]

When I was in sixth grade, one of the kids showed us at recess how you could make yourself faint by crouching down, hyperventilating for 30 seconds, standing up quickly, putting your thumb in your mouth and blowing really hard.

I tried it once. It worked, but it freaked me out.

[Cricket24]

"They do it in groups, at parties, at sleepovers, in school locker rooms and in lavatories. But they've added a dangerous element to a game some of their parents played as children."
What? As a kid I had never even heard of this let alone do it.
Excuse me but do kids today have any brains at all? WHAT about old fashioned common sense? Any idiot should be able to realize how dangerous this is.
I really worry about this generation.

[spudsmaki]

as a sexual high

Likely heard it described in Sex Ed. My kids did. It's a common practice among gay men.

I like NEA schoolteachers less and less all the time.

[reformedliberal]

Over 46 years ago, a classmate of mine died with the hanging game. He was bright and religious. He told his girlfriend he wanted to see God. He didn't expect to die. We were sophomores in HS.

Everyone was totally shocked. This wasn't something commonly done at slumber parties or other gatherings. Although I recall hearing about blowing on your thumb after hyperventilating, I don't recall ever wanting to try it. Sneaking liquor out of our parent's cabinets was the common thing, although there were rumors of marijuana here and there.

[Gorzaloon]

I'm in my 50's and way back, in the dark ages, when I was in high school, there was something kids used to do to "pass out"...I think it was hyperventilating

Yes, we did it also, but hyperventilation or holding the breath is at least self-limiting. We thought it was funny to freak the teacher out by having the class start dropping like flies.

Adolescents are immortal, we/they think. We knew everything, too.

[Gondring]

ping