Posted on 10/15/2005 8:17:02 PM PDT by nickcarraway
WHEN women first joined the executive ranks of corporate America a generation ago, they donned sober slacks and button-down shirts. They carried standard-issue briefcases and adopted their male colleagues' stoicism.
More than two decades later, women have stopped trying to behave like men, trading in drab briefcases for handbags and embracing men's wear only if it is tailored to their curves. Yet there is one taboo from the earlier, prefeminist workplace that endures: women are not allowed to cry at the office. It is a potentially career-marring mistake that continues to be seen as a sign of weakness or irrationality, no less by women themselves than by men.
For evidence consider a recent episode of NBC's "Apprentice: Martha Stewart," in which a young woman whose team had just lost a flower-selling contest told Ms. Stewart that she felt like crying. Her admission elicited no sympathy from her prospective employer, only blunt career advice.
"Cry and you are out of here," Ms. Stewart said. "Women in business don't cry, my dear."
Women in politics don't either, judging by Geena Davis's performance as the steely Mackenzie Allen on ABC's "Commander in Chief." Discussing the pilot episode, in which Allen navigates a political minefield to ascend to the office of president of the United States, Ms. Davis told a reporter from The Chicago Sun-Times, "I did not cry in my pilot - no!"
For reasons both biological and social, scientists and sociologists say, women are more inclined than men to feel the urge to cry when they are frustrated. Yet Martha Stewart is not the only woman executive who expects her underlings to remain dry-eyed. Many other workplace veterans also impose the rule and through seminars, books, Web sites and private conversations, recommend tricks for how to follow it.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
I don't remember Hillry crying; Bill cried so often, I can barely single each occiurence out.
Well it's ok to cry in the bathroom :')
LOL. No offense taken.
I truly do not take business personally, nor do I expect other rational creatures to. Business is nothing more than a complex game to win dollars. Investing significant quantities of emotion into it betrays a lack of perspective and an absence of self-control. I've never personally seen a problem with this; both the men and women that I work with are tough as nails and have the appropriate attitude toward these kinds of things. Periodic losses are to be expected and nothing to be ashamed of.
My tagline has far more to do with my time spent arguing on FreeRepublic than as a view of business. It is little more than a wistful view of the passing of life, something to think about after a fine drink or two on any given evening.
I hate seeing guys cry all the time.
Actually, one of the lines in some poetry I wrote once described a woman who..."laughs way more than she cries, but when she cries, cries way louder than she laughs"
If a dame don't cry, I don't trust her...
Heh. You and me both.
It is not that I do not have emotions it is more that I must be strong as steel always, for myself but more importantly for others. No matter what happens or how bad things get, people expect me to be a rock and gain strength from the fact that I remain as such under the most adverse of conditions. That is one of the burdens real men must carry for the benefit of others, but requires a fortitude and constitution that few appreciate.
I have been known to cry at the Movies, I even teared up over a Commercial once.
"And there's no crying in baseball either"
Which is a funny thing because baseball players (and cowboys) cry at the drop of a hat.
Too many teardrops for one heart to be cryin'
Too many teardrops for one heart
To carry on
You're gonna cry ninety-six tears
You're gonna cry ninety-six tears
You're gonna cry cry, cry, cry, now
You're gonna cry cry, cry, cry
Ninety-six tears c'mon and lemme hear you cry, now
Ninety-six tears (whoo!) I wanna hear you cry
Night and day, yeah, all night long
Uh-ninety-six tears cry cry cry
C'mon baby, let me hear you cry now, all night long
Uh-ninety-six tears! Yeah! C'mon now
Uh-ninety-six tears!
I used to have a horrible boss. He must have thought I had a bladder about the size of a pea. Whenever he would upset me and I felt I was losing control I would quietly excuse myself to go to the bathroom. One day the jerk made me cry. Afterwards I looked in the mirror to fix my face and all I could think about was how crying made the green in my eyes sparkle and how pretty they were. He just looked at me when I came out laughing.
What happens when you get bad news at work, like someone dying?
I don't think people thought less of me when I went into my office to cry while my brother was going through surgery for cancer.
I don't think people thought less of me when I had tears in my eyes when I had to tell about my 3 miscarriages.
I certainly didn't think less of anyone for crying in the workplace if it was for a good reason.
I only cry when I get mad and then I get madder because I'm crying:')
I do clearly remember one Clinton official breaking down and crying which startled the Senators. They eased up and the official sailed through the rest of the testimony.
I may be wrong about Ms Tyson but I believe that it was her.
I cried when I found out my grandmother died.
My dad had open heart surgery right after I graduated from college. I had just started working, and my company had sent me on a business trip for a month.
My parents told me not to come home for the surgery. Well, my dad almost died. I had a horrible time getting a flight home, and I was in tears all day long worrying.
I don't think anyone thought less of me for crying.
Now, I never cried for things like people making me mad.
I also worked where Richard Farley came in and shot up the place (ESL in Sunnyvale). He killed 7 of our co-workers. We all got used to seeing our co-workers crying, including most of the evecutives. We had to endure memorial services, police interviews, and just working in the place. Everyone was emotional.
I am firmly convinced that the rest of the world is insanely jealous of our green eyes (being a green eyed scoundrel myself). If you have green eyes you have everything, and there is little that can happen that will take that magic away.
On the subject of guys crying...I just watched one of the reruns of 'King of the Hill'...Peggy drags Hank to a chick flick, and he resents going...his truck was on the verge of breaking down for good(it was only 20yrs after all)...in the chick flick Hank starts to cry, but denies he is crying...
When he remembers the movie, while driving his sick truck, he starts to cry again...Peggy tries to analyze why he is crying...as usual she is wrong...
Hank is crying over the fact that his truck is on its last legs...it then becomes totally destroyed when a train hits it, because it broke down on the railroad crossing..
I guess, for some men, the 'death' of their vehicle, can bring them to tears...
You must have missed the relevant 9th Circus Court of Appeals' ruling in September, as reported on FR from a legal newsletter now cached here? The NYT isn't going soft...it's all part of the Master Plan...
Screaming and yelling by men at work may now be sex-based discrimination if women at work find the behavior more intimidating than men do.Only way the Left can admit the truth is if they can create a new class of victimhood.
On September 2, 2005, in E.E.O.C. v. National Education Association, (No. 04-35029), the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that the reasonable woman standard applies to workplace abusive conduct, even if there is no sexual content to the behavior.
Three women working for a labor union, the National Education Association, sued for gender discrimination claiming that the NEA created a sex-based hostile work environment for them through the conduct of an interim assistant executive director who frequently screamed at female employees in a loud and profane manner, with little or no provocation, shook his fists at them, stood behind an employee as she worked, and lunged across the table at another.
The conduct was not sexual, nor was it marked by sexual language, gender-specific words, sexual stereotypes, or sexual overtures.
While there was evidence that the same director raised his voice with men on occasion, and once frightened a male subordinate, male employees seemed to deal with that abuse with banter, and did not express the same fear of the director, did not cry, become panicked or feel physically threatened, avoid contact with the director, call the police, or ultimately resign, as did one woman.
Perhaps, but the ramifications depend on your position. I personally have a reputation for being utterly imperturbable that is valuable to me on many levels. People deeply trust me precisely because I can carry on and do what needs to be done under the most adverse of conditions.
Because of my apparent strength, people are willing to entrust me with a great deal, knowing that I will not yield out of emotional weakness or insecurity. People know I have emotions, but they also see that it never interferes with my decisions or ability to execute. This is very comforting to others, to see me take the full force of the blows that life offers while never waivering. It is a choice I have made and a necessary role in society. I do it so that others do not have to.
It is not easy, but I have the constitution for it. There may yet be a day when something breaches that barrier.
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