Posted on 10/14/2005 10:20:29 AM PDT by add925
The good wife's guide
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal(especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people.
3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
5. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables.
6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces(if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
8. Be happy to see him.
9. Greet him with a warm smile and shoe sincerity in your desire to please him.
10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first- remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
12. Your goal: Try to make sure your homeis a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
13. Dont greet him with complaints and problems.
14. Dont complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
17. Dont ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will alwaysexercise his will with fairness and truthfullness. You have no right to question him.
18. A good wife always knows her place.
The story about my Dad would be a whole nother chapter. For lots of reasons my Dad had a hard time loving me. After a little therapy, listening to family history, etc. I can understand about my Dad. He never physically or mentally abused my Mom or my sister, just me, but I know why and it's ok. So, not only was there that reason but my parents lived together til death and he fully expected my sister and I to do the same. Divorce just wasn't an option to him.
While I understand people can have an episode and it doesn't have to mean the end of the marriage, mine wasn't like that. I left once I realized it didn't matter how I acted when he came home, I was going to be in danger whether I was upset or whether I was happy to see him.
He's still out there and still abusing women he's in relationships with. I had one shot at maybe helping him learn how to do things differently. He really loved the wife after me and she left him for much the same reasons I did. I asked him if he was willing to do whatever it took to make that relationship work and he said yes.
Unfortunately by the time I located a counselor and talked his wife into agreeing to give it a 2nd chance, he changed his mind...all in the space of 4 hours. It's a shame because I really liked that wife but she deserved better.
har.
Well, they've fixed that now...
Your edge and lack of a sense of humor are making my point perfectly. Keep it up sweetie.
LOL. I figured you'd get a kick out of this.
Sweet One, you may have filed the paperwork, but it was your husband who broke the covenant. I pray for blessings upon and in and through you in the Powerful Name of Jesus Christ.
There are thousands and thousands of stories like yours, and so many women who don't dare to leave - they feel damned if they do and damned if they don't.
Even Dr. Laura says first thing in her book, The Proper Care and Feeding... that her advice does not apply to women married to "jerks".
Nope. I just sat and made them up for a laugh. I have to admit though, I read through some of the items in the original list and thought, Where did we go wrong?
It's gotten rather rough out there since then, hasn't it?
Yes, sad but true, yet there should be enough good conservative women, American or not, who make "the commitment" worth the while.
I think the forgotten rule for the relationship is that it's not a 50/50 effort, it's 100/100 that makes it work. There's still a few who "get it".
For the rest, they need a good lawyer, the sooner the better.
Yep, it sure was and what was even better, it was mutual. The men back then were more loyal, understanding, caring and appreciative. I thank GOD I still have mine. The years take their toll and we are both a little the worse for wear but still appreciative of each other.
Starched burqa?! Hey wait a minute, that one has some possibilities! :)))
"For a while anyway, our parents had it pretty good. Less stress, roles were more clearly defined AND THE APPLE PIE WAS BETTER!"
You say it succinctly but well capture the argument for stay-at-home mothers and wives. Don't run for the hills, lol, many of us very much agree with you.
I hear that!
Did that sixth paragraph really say,.."like a mink?"
I do not think this article is funny.
I find it commendable.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.