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Is Living Together Before Marriage Totally Accptable? ...Freeper Insight Needed
7.31.05 | mlmr

Posted on 07/31/2005 3:19:52 PM PDT by mlmr

So I have been trying to rent an apartment in my home...and all I have answering the ads are boyfriends and girlfriends. No matter what social status, no matter what income level, I am seeing unmarried twenty, thirty and forty year old couples who want to live together. If I question them, they don't even understand why I am asking.

These are Christians and Jews. I was so surprised to find that it would be so difficult to find a young married couple.

Tell me Dear Freeper...am I totally out of the ballgame to expect to find a young married couple? Am I expecting something that just isn't in our culture anymore?


TOPICS: Society
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To: Hildy

Why, thank you!

Now if I could just get the ~!#$%^ invitations to print . . . I'm on my way to CompUSA to return the printer I bought YESTERDAY that won't do it.


161 posted on 07/31/2005 4:36:13 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Anything is possible when you don't understand how anything happens.)
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To: SpringheelJack

God bless them for sticking together anyway for their children's sake and their own. It says a lot of good about them even if they have such incompatabilities...and I believe in the end, they will realize that they love and cherish each other, even with the problems, more than they realize.


162 posted on 07/31/2005 4:36:16 PM PDT by Jeff Head (www.dragonsfuryseries.com)
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To: cyborg

After eight years, you'd think he'd have wised up! ;)


163 posted on 07/31/2005 4:36:35 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Anything is possible when you don't understand how anything happens.)
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To: wimpycat

I can say from personal experience that living together before marriage prepares you for precisely NOTHING. We knew we were going to get married, and we had already made the emotional commitment...to a limited degree, as it turned out, but we didn't know it at the time. A legal and religiously valid marriage changes the relationship, I don't care how long you live together (or how long the "experiment" lasts), it's not the same. I can't explain it, but it's not the same

Many people say the same. It think marriage turns the relationship from a loooooong date to a cauldron of emotions. Marriage is about forever, passion and trust. Not aboaut splitting the rent or putting downt the toilet seat.


164 posted on 07/31/2005 4:36:36 PM PDT by mlmr (CHICKIE-POO!)
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To: Xenalyte

LOL!!!


165 posted on 07/31/2005 4:36:50 PM PDT by cyborg (to love,honor and obey...)
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To: Xenalyte

LOL!!! I printed my own invites too. I ended up ruining so many it would have been cheaper to have them printed!!!


166 posted on 07/31/2005 4:37:37 PM PDT by Hildy ("You miss 100% of the shots you never take." - Wayne Gretzky)
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To: DefiantZERO

Don't you think that the foundation of a strong society is the moral fiber of the members?


167 posted on 07/31/2005 4:37:37 PM PDT by mlmr (CHICKIE-POO!)
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To: Xenalyte; Hildy

I am tempted to do that but I slapped myself to reality ;o) Too many budget printers for me to do it myself.


168 posted on 07/31/2005 4:39:12 PM PDT by cyborg (to love,honor and obey...)
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To: unbalanced but fair

You're right, it's sexist.

But true.


169 posted on 07/31/2005 4:39:40 PM PDT by mlmr (CHICKIE-POO!)
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To: Jeff Head

Thanks. I certainly hope they have that brightness at the end of their days.


170 posted on 07/31/2005 4:40:43 PM PDT by SpringheelJack
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To: cyborg

Referring to women as a having a shelf-life is sexist. Perhaps it was your choice of words. Not all women want to have or, can have, children. And men don't always make good fathers, no matter what their age.


171 posted on 07/31/2005 4:40:57 PM PDT by unbalanced but fair
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To: DefiantZERO

Oh. Well, yes, your situation is different (but in a way that has nothing to do with the efficacy of cohabitation). I have a cousin with the same condition and she's married to somebody who also has the same condition. Whew! But it seems they're able to keep each other on a pretty even keel.


172 posted on 07/31/2005 4:41:35 PM PDT by wimpycat (Hyperbole is the opiate of the activist wacko.)
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To: mlmr

I have my own moral code, and admittedly it's relaxed in certain areas and strict in others. I suppose my thoughts on society is influenced a lot by the libertarian beliefs I have. I often feel that "society" means "conformity" and I don't believe in doing things because the majority does them, or history shows a tradition of them.


173 posted on 07/31/2005 4:42:13 PM PDT by DefiantZERO
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To: DefiantZERO; Mrs. Don-o

This is actually one of the best threads I have seen in a while. I am going to ping the wise woman (who is not interested in my movie.)


174 posted on 07/31/2005 4:42:22 PM PDT by don-o (Don't be a Freeploader. Do the right thing and become a Monthly Donor!)
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To: mlmr; unbalanced but fair

If I didn't meet someone soon, I was not going to bother looking anymore. As much as I wish it wasn't so, most men meet a woman with their eyes first. Plus the older you get, the less desirable you are and many go after the young chickiepoos. I've been around the sun about thirty times and even noticed girls younger than me getting more attention. It sucks.


175 posted on 07/31/2005 4:42:59 PM PDT by cyborg (to love,honor and obey...)
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To: Xenalyte

I've been living with Xena's Guy since early 1998. We're getting married September 17.


It's about time you made an honest man of him.


176 posted on 07/31/2005 4:43:05 PM PDT by mlmr (CHICKIE-POO!)
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To: SpringheelJack; cyborg

**It's still a lot different from marriage. If you're married, you're going to have to live together, and the two of you may easily have incompatabilities that a courtship, no matter how long, did not bring to the surface.**

I agree with cyborg. A long courtship is important. I was not a born again christian (neither was my wife), was a handsome fella with a sporty car. Spent a lot of time dating girls, some for months. Some found out I wouldn't 'do them' (first date or fiftieth).

My parents were an example of having sex without one of them being in love. A pregnancy, then a 'do the right thing' marriage. It ended in divorce when I was just about to date girls in earnest. My mother's talk to me really convinced me to hold out until marriage. It wasn't easy but it was worth it. I found this girl with the right personality AND knock out looks. She held me at bay for 11 months, but we were (and 27 plus years later, still) in love, I'm glad we waited.

I think the 'drive it first' mentality is lame excuse for not wanting to be in love first, then marriage and sex.

Married couples, IN LOVE, are the best of the 'red hot lovers', if my marriage is an example.

Marriage vows. Some people don't know what a vow is.

My dad told my sister, who was still single and a virgin at 35: "If you're looking for the perfect guy, he's nowhere to be found".

True love is the key.


177 posted on 07/31/2005 4:43:51 PM PDT by Zuriel (Acts 2:38,39....nearly 2,000 years and still working today!)
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To: cyborg

It also saves you alot of aggravation!!! I just saw that invitation recently, as I was moving, and it brought back all that feeling of stress I had when I was doing them. Although they were really pretty. :)


178 posted on 07/31/2005 4:43:57 PM PDT by Hildy ("You miss 100% of the shots you never take." - Wayne Gretzky)
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To: DefiantZERO

Blessings to you and yours.


179 posted on 07/31/2005 4:44:29 PM PDT by mlmr (CHICKIE-POO!)
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To: unbalanced but fair

Why wouldn't a woman want to have children? God said to man and woman 'be fruitful and multiply'. I'm most certain we'll have to agree to disagree on those points since I'm taking a decidedly traditional Roman Catholic stance.


180 posted on 07/31/2005 4:45:12 PM PDT by cyborg (to love,honor and obey...)
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