Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Commandments for Politically Incorrect Living
Vanity Post ^ | 07/26/05 | Alan Burkhart

Posted on 07/26/2005 6:02:09 PM PDT by neverhome

Commandments For Politically Incorrect Living

  1. Thou shalt have no nation before The United States of America.
  2. Thou shalt always say "Under God" when reciting the Pledge of Allegiance.
  3. Honor thy Bush and thy Cheney.
  4. Thou shalt not blaspheme against Microsoft or Haliburton.
  5. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's Corvette
  6. Thou shalt use every tax loophole in existence, and hoard thy money.
  7. Thou shalt not buy an electric car, for it is uncool.
  8. Thou shalt not oppose drilling for domestic oil.
  9. Thou shalt not try to "understand" weird people.
  10. Thou shalt not have a sex-change.
  11. Thou shalt not trust any man who weareth a diaper upon his head
  12. Thou shalt not suffer a Chihuahua to live.
  13. Thou shalt not use recycled toilet paper.
  14. Thou shalt not worship the false gods of Global Warming, Zero Body Fat, or Animal Rights.
  15. Thou shalt support our troops and their Commander in Chief.
  16. Thou shalt be proficient in the use of a handgun.
  17. Thou shalt not sue thy doctor over a hangnail.
  18. Thou shalt not eat "veggie burgers," for they art unclean.
  19. Thou shalt not atone for the alleged sins of thy forefathers.
  20. Thou shalt speakest only English while on hallowed American soil.
  21. Thou shalt spank thy children when they screweth up.
  22. Thou shalt spell-check thine e-mails and instant messages.
  23. Thou shalt visit FreeRepublic each day, for it is groovy.


TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: commandments; incorrect; politically
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-51 next last
To: neverhome
2X. If Thouest Dost Perchance Happen to be Imbibing in a Beacon Hill Tavern Frequented by the "Most Honorable" Ted Kennedy or John Kerry, it Doth Be Thine Divine Honor Bound Duty to Invite the Subject of Oldsmobiles or Swift Boats.
21 posted on 07/26/2005 6:27:56 PM PDT by benjaminjjones
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: benjaminjjones

Shoot! I could run with this theme, but TB took the lead from the Red Sox. BRB


22 posted on 07/26/2005 6:28:56 PM PDT by benjaminjjones
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 21 | View Replies]

To: TomServo

It is most groovy!


23 posted on 07/26/2005 6:29:54 PM PDT by alarm rider (Irritating leftists as often as is humanly possible....)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

Comment #24 Removed by Moderator

To: neverhome
Thou shalt hide the Guinness in the garage, using only the cheap beer for guests.
25 posted on 07/26/2005 6:31:26 PM PDT by Pukin Dog (Sans Reproache)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: neverhome

Thou shalt not stune thy neighbor's beiber.


26 posted on 07/26/2005 6:35:05 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: judgeandjury

Who's to say what is or isn't "cool"?>>>>>>>>

My question is why should I give a damn what is cool or uncool?


27 posted on 07/26/2005 6:38:30 PM PDT by RipSawyer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: TomServo
Yeah - thou shalt not abuse the Activism sidebar

You could go blind that way.

28 posted on 07/26/2005 6:41:12 PM PDT by Larry Lucido
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

Comment #29 Removed by Moderator

To: neverhome
Personally, I would substitute Chinese Crested for Chihuahua.

Now that is one dog that doesn't deserve to live. LOL

30 posted on 07/26/2005 6:45:24 PM PDT by mollynme (cogito, ergo freepum)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: mollynme
Now that is one dog that doesn't deserve to live. LOL
How's about this one? :p
31 posted on 07/26/2005 6:56:00 PM PDT by neverhome (If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: mollynme
Hey!! >:(

I admit, hairless dogs are an abomination, but I love my Crested Powderpuffs.
32 posted on 07/26/2005 6:58:30 PM PDT by Venerable Bede
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: neverhome
Are you sure that's a dog?????
33 posted on 07/26/2005 7:09:37 PM PDT by mollynme (cogito, ergo freepum)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: judgeandjury

"Who's to say what is or isn't "cool"?"

I am, for I am very cool(and humble too, if you can't tell)...and electric cars are not. People actually think the electric car does not pollute, just because it doesn't make poisonous fumes at a tailpipe, when the electricity used to charge the batteries is produced by power plants that do indeed pollute. Typical overlook of logic by liberal environmentalist zealots.

Plus, they look dorky.


File under "DUH!"

Hybrids are where it's at.


34 posted on 07/26/2005 7:10:37 PM PDT by Blue Collar Christian ( You anti-American socialists can stop calling yourselves Democrats now. ><BCC>NRA)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: neverhome
4. Thou shalt not blaspheme against Microsoft...

You can't blaspheme an obscenity.

18. Thou shalt not eat "veggie burgers," for they art unclean.

LOL! Sooooo true!

35 posted on 07/26/2005 7:12:19 PM PDT by Prime Choice (Thanks to the Leftists, yesterday's deviants are today's "alternate lifestyles.")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Venerable Bede
but I love my Crested Powderpuffs.

They're adorable!
Here's my (14 lb) lap baby...
36 posted on 07/26/2005 7:18:56 PM PDT by neverhome (If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]

To: neverhome

You forgot to include Wal-Mart in number 4.


37 posted on 07/26/2005 7:26:09 PM PDT by Venerable Bede
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Venerable Bede
You forgot to include Wal-Mart in number 4.

Thou shalt not goest to that foul temple of evil, Wal-Mart, for it didst close down the author's favorite K-Mart which was closer to his hallowed trailer park and had a Little Caesars inside.
38 posted on 07/26/2005 7:30:17 PM PDT by neverhome (If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 37 | View Replies]

To: neverhome

They're wonderful dogs, but good luck finding one. They're both purebreeds (with papers) my mother got from an exec at Land's End. Katie is the white one - I wish I had a better picture of her. She's adorable. Cooper's fur has turned from that blonde color to a lighter shade since he got older.


39 posted on 07/26/2005 7:32:24 PM PDT by Venerable Bede
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 36 | View Replies]

To: neverhome

Haw haw. I don't care for them myself and haven't been in one in over a year but I'm not going to jump on the hate bandwagon.


40 posted on 07/26/2005 7:35:54 PM PDT by Venerable Bede
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 38 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-51 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson