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Commandments for Politically Incorrect Living
Vanity Post ^
| 07/26/05
| Alan Burkhart
Posted on 07/26/2005 6:02:09 PM PDT by neverhome
Commandments For Politically Incorrect Living
- Thou shalt have no nation before The United States of America.
- Thou shalt always say "Under God" when reciting the Pledge of Allegiance.
- Honor thy Bush and thy Cheney.
- Thou shalt not blaspheme against Microsoft or Haliburton.
- Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's Corvette
- Thou shalt use every tax loophole in existence, and hoard thy money.
- Thou shalt not buy an electric car, for it is uncool.
- Thou shalt not oppose drilling for domestic oil.
- Thou shalt not try to "understand" weird people.
- Thou shalt not have a sex-change.
- Thou shalt not trust any man who weareth a diaper upon his head
- Thou shalt not suffer a Chihuahua to live.
- Thou shalt not use recycled toilet paper.
- Thou shalt not worship the false gods of Global Warming, Zero Body Fat, or Animal Rights.
- Thou shalt support our troops and their Commander in Chief.
- Thou shalt be proficient in the use of a handgun.
- Thou shalt not sue thy doctor over a hangnail.
- Thou shalt not eat "veggie burgers," for they art unclean.
- Thou shalt not atone for the alleged sins of thy forefathers.
- Thou shalt speakest only English while on hallowed American soil.
- Thou shalt spank thy children when they screweth up.
- Thou shalt spell-check thine e-mails and instant messages.
- Thou shalt visit FreeRepublic each day, for it is groovy.
TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: commandments; incorrect; politically
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To: neverhome
2X. If Thouest Dost Perchance Happen to be Imbibing in a Beacon Hill Tavern Frequented by the "Most Honorable" Ted Kennedy or John Kerry, it Doth Be Thine Divine Honor Bound Duty to Invite the Subject of Oldsmobiles or Swift Boats.
To: benjaminjjones
Shoot! I could run with this theme, but TB took the lead from the Red Sox. BRB
To: TomServo
23
posted on
07/26/2005 6:29:54 PM PDT
by
alarm rider
(Irritating leftists as often as is humanly possible....)
Comment #24 Removed by Moderator
To: neverhome
Thou shalt hide the Guinness in the garage, using only the cheap beer for guests.
25
posted on
07/26/2005 6:31:26 PM PDT
by
Pukin Dog
(Sans Reproache)
To: neverhome
Thou shalt not stune thy neighbor's beiber.
26
posted on
07/26/2005 6:35:05 PM PDT
by
Joe 6-pack
(Que me amat, amet et canem meum.)
To: judgeandjury
Who's to say what is or isn't "cool"?>>>>>>>>
My question is why should I give a damn what is cool or uncool?
To: TomServo
Yeah - thou shalt not abuse the Activism sidebar You could go blind that way.
Comment #29 Removed by Moderator
To: neverhome
Personally, I would substitute Chinese Crested for Chihuahua.
Now that is one dog that doesn't deserve to live. LOL
30
posted on
07/26/2005 6:45:24 PM PDT
by
mollynme
(cogito, ergo freepum)
To: mollynme
Now that is one dog that doesn't deserve to live. LOL How's about this one? :p
31
posted on
07/26/2005 6:56:00 PM PDT
by
neverhome
(If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
To: mollynme
Hey!! >:(
I admit, hairless dogs are an abomination, but I love my Crested Powderpuffs.
To: neverhome
Are you sure that's a dog?????
33
posted on
07/26/2005 7:09:37 PM PDT
by
mollynme
(cogito, ergo freepum)
To: judgeandjury
"Who's to say what is or isn't "cool"?"
I am, for I am very cool(and humble too, if you can't tell)...and electric cars are not. People actually think the electric car does not pollute, just because it doesn't make poisonous fumes at a tailpipe, when the electricity used to charge the batteries is produced by power plants that do indeed pollute. Typical overlook of logic by liberal environmentalist zealots.
Plus, they look dorky.
File under "DUH!"
Hybrids are where it's at.
34
posted on
07/26/2005 7:10:37 PM PDT
by
Blue Collar Christian
( You anti-American socialists can stop calling yourselves Democrats now. ><BCC>NRA)
To: neverhome
4. Thou shalt not blaspheme against Microsoft... You can't blaspheme an obscenity.
18. Thou shalt not eat "veggie burgers," for they art unclean.
LOL! Sooooo true!
35
posted on
07/26/2005 7:12:19 PM PDT
by
Prime Choice
(Thanks to the Leftists, yesterday's deviants are today's "alternate lifestyles.")
To: Venerable Bede
but I love my Crested Powderpuffs.
They're adorable!
Here's my (14 lb) lap baby...
36
posted on
07/26/2005 7:18:56 PM PDT
by
neverhome
(If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
To: neverhome
You forgot to include Wal-Mart in number 4.
To: Venerable Bede
You forgot to include Wal-Mart in number 4.
Thou shalt not goest to that foul temple of evil, Wal-Mart, for it didst close down the author's favorite K-Mart which was closer to his hallowed trailer park and had a Little Caesars inside.
38
posted on
07/26/2005 7:30:17 PM PDT
by
neverhome
(If Michael Jackson eats a fruitcake... izzit cannilbalism???)
To: neverhome
They're wonderful dogs, but good luck finding one. They're both purebreeds (with papers) my mother got from an exec at Land's End. Katie is the white one - I wish I had a better picture of her. She's adorable. Cooper's fur has turned from that blonde color to a lighter shade since he got older.
To: neverhome
Haw haw. I don't care for them myself and haven't been in one in over a year but I'm not going to jump on the hate bandwagon.
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