Posted on 05/25/2005 10:34:53 AM PDT by SamFromLivingston
Did the teacher make a pass at the boy?
It cannot be fixed and it will not be fixed. The school system is in meltdown (with a very few exceptions duly noted). If you can afford the money for private schooling, or the time required for home schooling, please consider it.
Beat him with a Koran.
Interesting article. The responses even more so.
Incidentially, I have a request for comments from my FReeper FRiends on a related matter: I have a friend who is working with a psychologist (I know, first mistake) on some issues with her children. She is recently divorced. Her youngest son is throwing tantrums at school. I just learned that the psychologist told her not to discipline him for incidents that happen at school. I did not respond to that, I was so taken aback at the sheer stupidity of that statement. He feels that the school should deal with it! I feel like I need to say something besides "fire the guy".
Comments/advice, please!
p.s. The kid is almost seven. A little old for tantrums!
This is one of the really bad unintended consequence of the libs' destroying schools' ability to discipline their pupils. A disruptive boy who, in the old days, would have had a quick trip to the principal's office for a paddling long before he worked up the courage to assault his teacher now gets coddled during all of his earlier, correctable disruptive conduct. Then, feeling emboldened, he assaults his teacher and the whole power of the criminal justice system lands on him, as it has to, there being no other practical alternative. If the school had been able effectively to discipline him early on all of this might have been avoided and he might be a productive student. The people who are most seriously injured by such coddling are the very kids being coddled.
She absolutely should discipline the kid for what he does at school. One of my worst fears while I was living with my parents and going to grade school and high school was what they would do to me if I did something really bad that caused the school to report my bad conduct to them. The consequences would have been enough to make me curse my mother for giving me birth. It's a profoundly effective deterrent.
The kid's having tantrums at school because he knows he can get away with it. The sooner he learns accountability, the better off he'll be. I know. There's an adoptive child (now over 40) in my family who's been a confirmed drug addict since she was about 14. She's never been held accountable, especially by her mother, and her life's been ruined as a result.
First, the acts of aggression (or temper tantrums). This boy DOES need to be punished at home for what he does at school His bad behavior is a poor reflection on the family, and it does this woman no good to ignore it. What happens in the home spills over to school, and vice versa. A sure sign of a centered child is one that behaves because it's the right thing to do, not because he/she will be punished for it.
Second, she needs to immediately discover the cause of the anger that is prompting these tantrums. A recent divorce caused upheaval in the child's life. The context through which they see themselves and their lives has changed, and children have a tendency to try to redefine the boundaries. Her ex-husband (presuming he's still somewhere in the picture) needs to be called in, too, and they need to speak with a common voice. Drop that psychologist and go with family counseling, instead, for ALL OF THEM.
This child needs a firm hand, not a best friend. You can be a loving parent that gets a kid to open up, but that doesn't mean you abdicate your responsibility to be disclipinarian, too.
I'm going through it now with my 3 and 5 year old. I'm pregnant, and this high-risk pregnancy is very hard on me. My kids think they can get away with murder because Mommy is so tired and can't do a lot anymore, so they are fighting more, and pushing more, and acting out to get my attention.
I hate having to start the day like a drill instructor giving out spankings, but it's calming the waters around here. My kids know that I still love them and care about them, and that I will correct them if they step out of line.
This child is looking for the same assurance. Despite all the changes, he or she wants to know that his relationship with his parents has not changed.
Interesting comment.
Wonder what his parents are like.
The apples typically doesn't fall far from the tree.
How true sometimes.
Unfortunately, that seems all too common nowadays.
Parents no longer support teachers. Many parents are not good at teaching children right and wrong. T.V., Music and Movies all promote violence and disrespect. Few parents or teachers are strong enough to provide leadership and correction for today's youth.
You must have good parents. It seems like with some people though, they want to show how much disrespect they can show others. I would have also been buried six feet under if I would have shown disrespect to teachers, policemen, etc.
Flash forward 5 years to now when the boy is 12/13 and in middle school. If something is not done now, he will be a holy terror and expelled before he gets to high school.
I'm going through it now with my 3 and 5 year old. I'm pregnant, and this high-risk pregnancy is very hard on me. My kids think they can get away with murder because Mommy is so tired and can't do a lot anymore, so they are fighting more, and pushing more, and acting out to get my attention.
I hate having to start the day like a drill instructor giving out spankings, but it's calming the waters around here. My kids know that I still love them and care about them, and that I will correct them if they step out of line.
You have identified a good reason to start human cloning. We need a LOT more people like you around.
He's from a broken home - he is one of ten children - he doesn't get any love - he has no real friends yada yada yada. It's our fault he punched the teacher.
I have a number of contacts who teach in the public school system - they teach different grade levels, different states, some in small towns, and others in larger cities. One taught advanced placement courses in high school.
They don't have any connection with each other, and I mainly ask questions and listen, so the information from one isn't tainted by the views of the others.
They all tell me the same story. In one state, the mentally challenged students are placed in the same classroom as all other students, but with the number of choices on multiple choice tests decreased to reduce the difficulty. In another state, a teacher's aide keeps mentally/physically challenged students from falling out of their chairs by holding them upright with a towel. In another school district, part of the female teacher's duties include changing a 12 year old boy's diaper. That's a small sampling of what I hear.
The unifying theme is that academic rigor is simply disappearing - again, with a few exceptions, duly noted. The average and above-average student - in terms of ability, motivation, or both - is ignored as the teachers attempt to cope with training "students" to consistently guide their spoon into their mouth. The public schools are little more than holding pens that bore capable students to tears and squander 12 years of their lives.
Please understand that I am not referring to special education classes - these are regular teachers teaching regular classes.
Please accept my compliments on your solution for your children. I know it's demanding, I recognize that it takes sacrifice, but you can give your children no greater gift.
Thanks so much for the advice. She had a conference today and then we discussed it together. She has a healthy attitude, but it is hard. This summer she is really going to work on it, and her ex is very supportive too.
Freepers are the greatest!
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