Posted on 03/02/2005 11:21:15 AM PST by srm913
One of my co-workers is a saver. About 15 years ago, our insurance company used a new password each week to identify company representatives. About a year ago, my co-worker found a file with all the passwords. He showed it to all of us and we all agreed there was no reason to keep it, so he threw out the file.
We have a sales convention every year and a top management person would leave company-wide e-mails to update us on information for the convention. A couple of days after my co-worker threw out the file, I called a top manager who sends e-mails updating us on the annual sales convention and asked him to send a fake company-wide e-mail to my co-worker announcing that there would be a contest at the convention and the person who could recall the most company passwords from the old days would win.
My co-worker read the e-mail and came out of his office white as a sheet. We only let him suffer for a couple of hours before we told him the truth.
Ann Mikiska, Farmington
The president of the company where I used to work had a very efficient secretary. When she put a stack of letters on his desk to be signed he didn't read them, just signed each letter and sent them back to her. The office jokester slipped in a sheet with the president's resignation on it, and of course he signed it. The jokester had a good time with it and no harm came from it.
(Excerpt) Read more at startribune.com ...
nope.
I knew he had an important class in the early afternoon so I set all the clocks in the room (including his watch) ahead several hours to just minutes before his class was supposed to start. I then shook him and told him he was late for this class. He jumped out of bed, checked his watch, muttered some thing unfortunate, took a quick shower and then dressed and flew off to his class.
When I saw him later that day, he said he had made it all the way to his class and sat down. He said that as other students started to file in, he suddenly realized that he didn't recognize any of them. He finally looked up at the clock in the room and it was only then that he realized what I had done. I had to sleep with my eyes open for a while after that.
There is a hair rinse (used by little old white haired ladies) called 'Roux' (I don't even know if they still make it--we used it in a salon I worked parttime in). It can make old white hair blue or violet...it works equally well on young blonde hair...it comes out of the bottle kind of a milky, shampooey looking liquid, so it was poured into her shampoo bottle in place of the real stuff. It does wash out after a dozen or so shampoos...but it was fun for my friend to see this girl in ball caps, bandanas and tears for a week...
A practical joker deserves applause for his wit according to its quality. Bastinado is about right. For exceptional wit one might grant keelhauling. But staking out on an anthill should be reserved for the very wittiest. ROBERT HEINLEIN
ROFLMAO! My DH LOVES his sweater vests; I'm e-mailing this to him right this very minute. I've been trying to drag him into the 21st Century for waaaaay too long now. Thank you! :)
So...I went to the Sierra Club website and copied their logo to a new Word doc and proceeded to write a letter to him from the regional director of the Sierra Club (I signed it Theodore Cleaver but he never made the connection) informing him that cutting trees down was a horrible thing to do and even though it was his own property, what he was doing was morally wrong. I concluded the letter by informing him that we would be watching him closely.
I mailed it on a Thursday and the following Monday, having heard nothing about the letter from him, I urged another guy to invite the guy into his office and ask if he could recommend an environmental group to send a contribution to as he was thinking about the Sierra Club...
The verbal tirade went on and on until I presented him with a copy of the letter I'd sent. The look on his face was priceless. He stopped coming into my office after that...no sense of humor I guess.
When I was in the Air Force we would leave messages on co-workers desks to call Colonel Sanders and put the number for the local KFC on it. I was amazed at how often it actually worked.
And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...
We did this a lot in USAF recruiting.
We had a guy named "earl" who was a mid-level manager. Earl was married but started dating the VP's secretary. He tried hard to make sure it was hush-hush. He left to go on vacation and some guys managed to lock his door and leave a note saying "See me immediately, VP" on the door. He was white as a sheet when he got back.
One of my favorite tales was when the DC (damage control) crew dressed in white tyvek suits and the scott air packs so they looked like a haz mat crew form some bad TV movie.
They went in to the squad bay where the guy who had the mid watch was sleeping, rattled him and said "Oh my god, we found one alive!"
Now THAT's a good one!
I left and accidentally discovered the gay and lesbian section in a nearby library aisle. I quickly took the most disgusting books ("Gay Men's Lust", etc.) and stuffed them into the bottom of my co-worker's backpack while he was away.
My co-worker later told me he gathered his stuff to leave for the night and as he was leaving the book alarms went off. Like 30 or so onlookers watched as his bag got searched and a librarian removes "Gay Men's Lust" from his backpack, as if he were going to steal it. He said he was speechless and finally said "Its not mine!". The librarian said, as if not believing him, "Suuure its not yours, Mr. Johnson". They let him go without getting in any trouble, but it was embarrassing as hell.
I was at a party one time where someone asked the host where the bathroom was, and instead of bringing the person to the bathroom the guy brought the guest into his roommates bedroom. He explained that he hated his roommate because he didn't drink enough. He then finished off the last swig of Jack Daniels from a bottle and broke it on the roomates dresser, then placed the remaining neck of the bottle into the roomates five gallon water cooler bottle that was half filled with coins. The neck of the Jack Daniels bottle acted as a funnel, and the host then proceeded to urinate into the five gallon bottle of pennies, as did the entire party. In a couple hours we had the entire five gallon bottle full to the top. When the roommate was about to get home from work the host chickened out and decided he better empty the bottle before the roommate got home, so he picked it up brought it into the bathroom, but just as he was hoisting it up to the toilet he lost his grip and the five gallon bottle fell and broke open all over the floor. What a mess, five gallons of urine and pennies. We all left before the roommate got home.
My slightly anal sister used to sleep in my room when she was off from college when I was growing up. One night, before she went to bed, she noticed a sock hanging part way out of a drawer and she got up and casually opened the drawer, put the sock all the way in, and closed the drawer.
The next night, while she was in the bathroom getting ready for bed, I went around the room and pulled something part way out of ALL the drawers and closet doors in the room. She spent a few minutes putting them ALL back in their place, not making a big deal out of it, just doing it "in the passing" as she was getting ready for bed.
Once she turned off the light and laid down, it got really quiet and I couldn't help but start giggling. All she said was, "MELODY!!"
During Greek Week, when the Fraternities are EXPECTED to toilet paper the Sorority they are paired with, we decided to do something special. The KKG house had huge stately oak trees out front. We used 8 cases of toilet paper and turned those babies into huge white balls. You could not see the trees. In addition, one of our brothers worked in a data processing facility and they had these 6' x 3' x 3' blocks of compressed shredded paper they got rid of regularly. We took three of them and were amazed how much they "decompressed." We put the entire front yard in shredded paper two feet deep.
Our Little Sisters decided to make us "special brownies." They were laced with LOTS of Ex-Lax. Our President, Steve, ate so many he was actually hospitalized. We got back at them by telling them to show up dressed to the nines for our annual group photo. We had them line up on our upstairs balcony, locked the doors, and then had Steve hose them down.
Ah, memories...
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WOW!!!
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