Posted on 02/26/2005 8:10:40 PM PST by SW6906
Generally:
You start to think "its not so bad here".
You say "this place sort of grows on you".
You say, "it feels cooler today" and find out that the temperature is 110.
You call your tent (trailer if you're lucky) "Home".
You get excited at the idea of "ICE".
Apaches excite you much more than Blackhawk's or Kiowa's.
Armaments:
You don't jump when a door slams or someone drops something.
You aren't alarmed when every second person you see has a gun or two or three.
You kick the M-16 on the floor aside without a second thought when you sit down in the Dining Facility.
A Glock 9MM on a lady's hip is considered sexy.
Mortars and Rockets are "Okay" compared to Vehicle bombs.
You can measure distances based on explosion sounds.
When a "Red Alert" sounds and you're leaving a DFAC, you would rather go back in and have more coffee instead of seeking shelter in a bunker.
You know the difference in sound between "Incoming " and "Outgoing".
Entertainment:
You get excited at the prospect of seeing the latest gun camera videos.
$5.oo for a DVD is a little pricey....especially if there is only one movie.
If you are disappointed if you can't find a new movie a day after it is released in theatres stateside.
Sitting around with your coworkers talking about different ways to be killed is considered "Water Cooler Talk".
Convoys:
You are soothed by the sounds of helicopters flying six feet over your trailer.
Bullet holes in the cab of your tractor is no longer alarming.
Tractor selections consist of "Up Armored or Not" not Volvo or Mercedes Benz.
Convoys consist of as many extra Hummers and large caliber weapons as the Convoy Commander can find.
Driving on the sidewalk is normal.
Hit-and-Run fender benders are treated as mere warnings.
You get upset that you don't get "C-130" Frequent Flyer Miles.
Your carry-on luggage includes a flack jacked and helmet.
Driving through the traffic circle of death has lost its thrill.
Hygiene:
You enjoy waiting 45 minutes for the toilets to refill.
It's ok to brush your teeth with the brown water that comes out of the faucets.
KBR buzz cuts begin to look stylish (Even on girls).
Flies don't even hang around the truck drivers.
You have your own roll of toilet paper stashed in your tent/truck/back pack.
A shower with water that is neither to cold to hot and contains no mosquitoes is a priceless unattainable luxury.
Surroundings:
"Texas Barriers" are something other that a device to keep Texans out.
"Jersey Barriers" are something other that fences to keep Holsteins away from Jerseys.
You get excited with the presence of clouds in the sky.
The security guards are Ghurka or South African.
Dining:
You look forward to Mohammad's Mango ice cream as the treat for the day.
Powdered eggs taste OK.
You consider plastic ware the Place China.
You can distinguish inherent qualities of various plastic utensils.
The quality of the plastic utensils becomes a hot dinner topic.
Lettuce for your salad is a luxury.
You have become to believe that ham should be grey in color.
No matter what animal you are eating, it will be flavored with curry.
Going to another mess hall is an adventure.
Putting Thousand Islands Dressing on you hamburger bun instead of mayo/mustard/catsup is normal.
You automatically pick up two plastic forks whenever beef is on the menu.
You accept the fact that fajitas do not require tortillas.
Sliced hot dogs on a pizza served in a KBR Defac is good eats.
If you can not decide if you are going leave a brownie and some milk during a mortar attack.
Fashion:
You think desert combat boots look great with shorts.
Sand between your thong sandals actually feels good.
You can recognize 12 different camouflage patterns.
You've given up on shoe polish.
T-shirts at the PX are: M, L, XL, XXL & KBR.
Living Conditions:
You get a big smile when you see your pressed clothes at the KBR laundry.
You get a bigger smile knowing they didn't lose your laundry.
You get the biggest smile when you get back someone else's laundry and now you have more underwear than before.
You think the bullet holes in the roof of your trailer is just another form of ventilation.
You get upset because the post office won't ship your looted artifacts.
You haven't had water from anything other than a bottle for months on end.
You consider broken sandbags just a new beach expansion.
The idea of a double wide trailer is only for the very rich and powerful.
Forgetting you military ID makes you feel naked...but pants are optional.
"Only one rocket has hit the camp" is excellent news.
Cardboard board boxes have become substantial pieces of furniture.
Communications:
Stars & Stripes seems to be a liberal newspaper.
It feels normal to have to run outside to make a cell phone call.
You call your coworkers as soon as new T-Shirt patterns arrive at the PX.
"Can you hear me" takes up 50% of your cellular telephone conversations.
Your conversations are sprinkled with "Roger that" and "Good copy".
It's weird. When I went on my first R&R in the spring of 2004, people said "You're going to start missing this place and you'll look forward to getting back when you're in the last couple of days of your vacation."
I said (and firmly believed), "No freakin' way."
But I really did. And I'm always glad to get back after R&R.
How sick is that?
What's sad is I can relate to almost everything on this list. And we've added a few of our own.
I have been in Iraq too long. LOL
You get upset because the post office won't ship your looted artifacts
Bump for reflection and thanksgiving :)
No, no...LOL. It's the enterprising Iraqis who make this possible.
Think "bootleg." ;-)
What's sad about it? I can relate to most everything on the list, and I'm just a mere civilian her in the USA. However, I think a woman is far sexier with a .45 than a 9mm.
Of course, as a member of FR's Hobbit Hole, we spend a lot of time and effort doing stuff for the troops. The latest request is to find marpat or DCU coveralls. That's a "special order" item.
Meanwhile, this is our "regular" inventory. If you know any GI (or civilian contractor) that could use one, freepmail me an APO/FPO.
"Here", not "her".
There's an even chance that the source of the dvd's is native.
Yep. You can spot them in theaters. They're the folks whose heads do not move throughout the entire movie. And always are wearing a bulky jacket/coat throughout the movie.
Well, unless you've been here living this wonderful life, you really can't completely relate. We talk about that....how we go home on vacation and face a barrage of questions from family and friends. We realize early on that you can answer the questions, but you have to live this to really understand it.
Before I came here, I never imagined I could have a mortar go off nearby and barely react at all, for example.
I'll ask around and get you some takers for those knives.
Thank you for all that you do for our fine troops!
This is absolutely great stuff!
Thanks for the ping. Some good ideas here. LOL!
If I had opened such a box, I would have wept for joy!
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