More Dads Take Stay-At-Home Route

WFTV ^ | 2/22/05 | Internet Broadcasting Systems

[qam1]

More Men Go From Boardroom To Playroom

ANNANDALE, Va. -- The job comes without a paycheck. The hours are long. The rewards can be priceless.

It's not something you put on your resume, but millions of men have decided to give up their careers and become stay-at-home dads, Washington, D.C., television station WRC reported.

Some mothers may resent the attention to stay-at-home dads, since they've been doing it for centuries.

But the station looked at the growing trend because it's a option many couples may not have explored.

This is about children, parents and a difficult choice.

That choice was the subject of the popular 1983 comedy "Mr. Mom." In that movie, a laid-off engineer stays home with his three kids while his wife returns to work.

It's fiction becoming a fact of life for a growing number of couples.

Chip and Heather Covell of Annandale made the decision eight months ago. As a special education teacher, Chip needed a break. Meanwhile, his wife's teaching career was taking off.

According to the latest U.S. Census figures, 3.6 million men stay home while their wives work. That's a 54 percent increase since 1986.

Human resource experts say the numbers will continue to climb.

"The so-called Generation X and Generation Y workforce are a little more open to the concept of staying at home and a spouse, in this case a wife, earning more than the husband," human resources manager Steven Williams said.

Damon Riley's wife is the vice president of a marketing firm. Staying home meant giving up his job as director of new student orientation at Georgetown University.

"Her salary was probably more than twice mine at the time, anyway. And having somebody come to the house was going to cost us almost all of my salary," Riley said.

Riley has been staying home since his twin daughters were born seven years ago.

Mothers in their Olney, Md., neighborhood are supportive.

"He's just one of the girls. No offense, Damon, but he's just one of us," stay-at-home mom Sophie Stopak said.

But fitting in can be difficult. That's where a group called DC Metro Dads comes in. The Bowie, Md., chapter meets every Monday.

"It gives us a network of other men, we get to sit around and talk about guy things," one of the dads said.

The couples told WRC that they began by doing the math. They compared child-care costs with the loss of one salary, and decided it was worth the sacrifice.

[luckystarmom]

My sister-in-law would disagree with you.

She loved my brother very much and is devastated now that he is dead.

She not only worked, she would go to work by 7am and usually be home by 4 pm.

The past 3 years were different because my brother was battling cancer. She took off of work when she needed to take care of him.

She loved him for who he was, and he loved her for who she was.

[Melas]

Yes I am. First my son, and then in the middle of this year, my daughter as well.

[Melas]

It works for a few years, but after a while, the novelty wears off.

Hell lady, I'm almost done. A few years nothing. I've been doing it since the birth of our first, and he's almost 13. The youngest is 11, and in about 5 short years, she'll be 16, and I can go back to work if I want. Now for the real shocker...my wife tells me that I shouldn't bother going back to work. By that time, I'll have been at home for close to 18 years, and she tells me it wouldn't be worth it to go back to work. So, I'd say your husband is wrong.

[Melas]

I've actually found that homeschooling is less time consuming than helping them with their homework was. Then again, I don't teach a ton of busy work with no earthly purpose like the public schools did either.

[Melas]

Nah, he's not. His observations are still his observations, and true. I personally don't think there are many men strong enough to deal with the social repercussions, and I'd quickly find that kind of man unattractive.

I guess I never ran into any social repurcussions. The guys in the motorcycle club always treated me the same as the rest. After I started going to church, I was treated like any other man. I missed the social repurcussions.

As for attractiveness, well, to be blunt I don't give a damn if you'd find me attractive or not. That's a personal thing. Some women don't like us bald guys, some women won't date guys shorter than they are (my wife is 11" taller than I am), there is always a reason that someone finds you unnattractive. Luckily, I wasn't unnattractive to everyone, and most importantly I wasn't unnattractive to my wife.

We can agree at least that his observations are still his observations. You'll never convince me that they're true. Life experience says otherwise.

Women tend to be control freaks about their homes, and when the stay-at-home dad doesn't clean well, cook well, supervise homework well, etc., the working mom can get very resentful. I'd guess you and your wife don't have those kinds of issues.

Housekeepers work cheap, and nothing else was challenging. I guess a working wife would get upset if her husband stayed at home in a ripped t-shirt and drank beer all day. Any spouse that worked, would be resentful of the scenerio you painted above. Dirty house, bad food, unwatched kids...hell yeah...anyone would be resentful. I'm a little offended however that's how you automatically suspect that the household of a stay at home father must operate.

If I couldn't run this place, I can assure you that I wouldn't be competent in any job. I guess I don't how you could expect anyone who could fail so miserably at running a house to be any better in the workplace. Competency is competency. I try to be good at everything I do, whether it be preparing for a karate tournament, fixing a motorcycle, putting a bandage on a knee, mopping a floor or practicing with one of my pistols.

[newgeezer]

Take a good close look at his posting history, and see the pattern.

Unfortunately, I can't seem to access his posting history. It seems to be gone.

Oh, well.

[Modernman]

If guys ever get the gig that woman gave up believe me they won't EVER (in later years)be burning their jockstraps in the street agitating to join the work force.

My wife curses Gloria Steinem and that generation of feminists. She and most of her girlfriends realize the the corporate world sucks. Seriously, who really wants to work?

A lot of younger women are realizing just how good their grandmothers had it.

Given the option of spending my life under the thumb of a boss (no matter how good the boss) or staying home and watching my kids grow up and being a major part of the process, the decision wouldn't even be close.

[Modernman]

Working a corporate job.

If that's what you want on your tombstone: "Here lies Bob, he was a great employee," then that's your choice.

I would prefer "Husband and Father" on mine.

[Modernman]

Be glad the moderator said to knock it off, and thank whatever god you pray to that you didn't say it to my face.

Some people only have the "courage" to insult others over the internet, so I doubt he would ever say it to your face.

[wtc911]

I used to tell my team that their job was to maximize personal revenue while minimizing time spent away from their families. Some guys got it, some guys believed the corporate hype...until that pink slip arrived.

[Melas]

Some people only have the "courage" to insult others over the internet, so I doubt he would ever say it to your face.

Yeah, I know the type. I once foolishly agreed to meet a guy from local bulletin board (pre-internet) years and years ago to hash out our differences. He ran.

Older and wiser, I wouldn't do it again. A good way to get shot. If not by the guy you went to meet, then by his buddy hiding behind the dumpster you didn't see.

[Lazamataz]

(Pinging other interested parties and targets of these people)

Hi, Mrs Smartass Phd.

How do I know you are a member of the Clown Posse? Well, let's review your posts:

• This post. You are known to be a girlfriend / fiance / harlot / used flesh of one Dr. Smartass PhD from Clown P*ssy, and Tim Dr Hook McCracken was recently shown to be one and the same person as Dr. Smartass PhD. So naturally, you come to his defense here, when he outted himself and was banned.
• In this post, you not-so-subtly make fun of ValerieUSA, and use the old CP line about me as needing to date her. Classic Clown P*ssy dreck.
• In this post, you play with Bob J, again not-so-subtly mocking him. Bob J is a favorite Clown P*ssy target.
• In this post, you actually tell Tim Dr Hook McCracken AKA Dr. Smartass PhD from Clown P*ssy that you love him - something that you have said on many other occasions to the same individual on numerous other forums.

I expect you, like any other Clown P*ssy members, will be nuked shortly. Now, first let's discuss the RAW hypocrisy of ranting and raving about Free Republic on one forum, then coming here anyways and behaving like you are a wondeful little FReeper. You are an abject hypocrate, a backstabbing worm, and you don't belong on this forum.

Now that we have gotten 'outing you' out of the way, let's discuss your post:

And who do you think you are? You have a big mouth and pick up on every 'puss puss" you can. No woman would want your vile revolting, addicted self. A better man than you to stay home with the kids. You sure know how to dish it out but cry mommy to the admins when you get some back at ya. So who is the real 'puss puss,' Mister Lazamataz? Someone call the admin on Lazamataz and have the vile, ladies man, banned-he sure likes to dish it out and whine.

First of all, I don't take advice well from backstabbing masters of hypocrisy, but let's go through these anyways. I have a big mouth and pick on puss-pusses? Sure. Anyone who abuses the system like this guy does is a puss puss. I will pick on them.

"No woman would want your vile revolting, addicted self." -- Heh heh heh.... my experience has shown me otherwise. No, I haven't found a new special someone like my lovely and gracious ex-wife -- and, by the way, I am thrilled for her, for two reasons: She deserves happiness, and it shows that I didn't damage her permanently -- but yet I still am dating fairly regularly. As far as the addiction, I am a grateful recovering addict, because it has taught me wonderful lessons about serenity, acceptance, courage, integrity, perseverence, open-mindedness, willingness....all the Spiritual Principles in the Steps... and makes it so that my connection with G-d is so powerful and permanent that nothing little midgets like you alleged "people" at Clown P*ssy have any true effect on me any more.

"You sure know how to dish it out but cry mommy to the admins when you get some back at ya. So who is the real 'puss puss,'" -- They say that if you throw a stone into a pack of dogs, the one that yelps is the one you hit. Must have hurt when your cyber-hubby Dr. Smartass PhD lost his screen name here. Well, he could have simply laid low and kept it, but he decided to out himself, much as you have.

Now, to another topic: Your little gossip club. You Clowns lie outright, exaggerate when you don't lie, and present only one side of any case in any given thread. Imagine a place on the net where the only real activity is hating people on another forum! What a bizarre concept! What odd people you are!

You like to think you push my buttons, but two people can play that game. For the longest time now, I have been playing to outrage you people. In the back of my mind, I've been saying to myself, 'what will piss the AntiFreepers off the most?', then I post it. Case in point: When you asshats lied and claimed I was with an *underage* Thai hooker, with absolutely NO evidence of age even in the one post I posted about it (which in itself was merely meant to shock 2Trievers at LP.. I think it was her... somebody. I forget.) but there you went, establishing myth as the New Reality, as you so often do.... so, I decided to REALLY set you ablaze and posted the $20 / redhead comment.

Sure enough, you people lost it. I loved it. You people are so easily played. You are my very own personal violin. In short: You've been

There will come a time when playing you people will come to an end for me. My spiritual growth is proceeding apace and I'm learning that joining you in your mental disorder is not something that will add to my serenity, my happiness, or my connection my Higher Power. I will be greatly ratcheting down the amount of times I read you. After all, anyone who knows you people knows by now it is a pit of lies and distortions. Once in a great while I'll read, just to see how far over the edge you guys have gone..... but not often. You'll be able to tell because I always go through an proxy anonymizer to get to you. No way I'll ever give you an IP.

I'll be writing a nice little disclaimer about your gossip clique on my FR homepage, and then I hope to decrease your signature on my radar... unless you pop up over here, then I'll work to identify you and snuff your screen name.

PS: Pass a message to Mojo / Dung Beetle: I truly enjoyed dissecting your latest Smear Job on Jim Robinson per the Asian Sex Trade claim, and rendering your lies impotent yet again. I note that the topic has disappeared off the radar. There ain't no There there, Steverino.

[Lazamataz]

I see the moderator has made short work of you. By the way, I forgot three items:

1) I don't expect that you Clowns will believe any of my text, but that really doesn't matter to me.

2) If, by chance, you finally do accept the truth, imagine your embarrassment as you realize that you have been trolled.....FROM ANOTHER FORUM!!!! LOL!

3) Thank you for naming yourself the Clown Posse. It seems you finally are obeying Truth in Advertising laws. :o)

[Melas]

Not to intrude, but to those of us not familiar with your personal drama here, your last two posts to this thread are totally incomprehensible. I'm just curious enough to ask what's going on?

[Lazamataz]

Not to intrude, but to those of us not familiar with your personal drama here, your last two posts to this thread are totally incomprehensible. I'm just curious enough to ask what's going on?

It's a long running internet feud. No need for much more detail, since I intend on moving forward -- pretty much by ignoring them, but stomping on them when they come here.

They get the message I sent, and that's all wot's important.

[Lazamataz]

I will add that these people hate Free Republic with a passion. Hate Jim Robinson; hate the executives of FR; hate high-profile posters.

That's about it.