BREAKING: INCOMING -- JUST NORTH OF ALASKA....

Self ^ | Dec. 24, 2004 | Self

[varina davis]

Dec. 24, 2004 -- A "mostly" unidentified object was spotted this morning soaring at extremely high altitude just north of Alaska, apparently headed south.

After pin-pointing the object on radar, U.S. military aircraft was poised to provide an "emergency" escort to the United States and other points through midnight tonight.

Though uncertain of the origin of the high-flying object, it is believed to resemble an old-fashioned sleigh and a jolly fat man can be seen with the reins to a passle of wild reindeer.

The object appears to be overloaded, with strange packages spilling out and dropping onto villages and cities as it makes it's way to various destinations.

President George W. Bush and Pentagon officials are aware of the situation and have ordered an uninterrupted flight for the sleigh, with cookies and hot chocolate served whenever and wherever it lands.

There is also a banner streaming from the rear of the sleigh-like object pronouncing: "Merry Christmas!"

[airborne]

[timpad]

NORAD has the object under track now. Apparently it is some sort of advanced-capability upper-atmosphere vehicle.

It climbed southward over the Bering Strait at hypersonic velocities and moved out over the Pacific. First confirmed landfall was Auckland, NZ and was later sighted over Sydney Harbor, NSW. Current track indicates object is heading northbound again bearing for some of the Asia-Pacific Islands.

No hostile intent has been detected. In fact, quite the opposite.

 

[b4its2late]

Hillary riding the broom again?

[Terabitten]

Air Defense Status is Yellow Tight.

[Lazamataz]

SHOOT IT DOWN!

Whaddya, the president of the ACLU???

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

There has to be a Santa Claus. There is no other way to explain that Chemistry set I got when I was nine. Mom and Dad both said I would only get it over their dead bodies but come Christmas it was under the tree.

[unspun]

Well, are we sure this "Santa" isn't on the terrorist watch list?

Even so, how are we sure this is actually Santa and not some Islamofascist in disguise?

Hmmm...?

[razorback-bert]

It's Hogswatch Time!

[mitchbert]

In the lower section of this page is a link to NORAD's Santa Web Cam which posts his latest sightings. Last shot had him over top a Japanese Bullet train passing Mt. Fuji. I'm not sure how often it updates but it's a cute touch.

Merry Christmas everyone!

[Libertarian4Bush]

a jolly fat man

?

[Libertarian4Bush]

time to test the missile defense shield... ;)

[Flux Capacitor]

----A "mostly" unidentified object was spotted this morning soaring at extremely high altitude just north of Alaska, apparently headed south.----

"We need to institute the Strategic Defense Initiative NOW," Reagan and George W. both said. "Until we do we are vulnerable to incoming IBMs," they tried to tell Congress.

BUT NO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O....

-Dan

[Netizen]

Could you please change the title to something less apocalyptic? I nearly had a heart attack when I read it.

LOL, Moving the thread to chat and adding VANITY to the title might help as well.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

I know somebody that is getting coal and switches in their stocking.

[TomGuy]

[American Vet Repairman]

"The object appears to be overloaded, with strange packages spilling out and dropping onto villages and cities "


This is Christiane Amanpour- The Christian Jihad has started in the White held Aryan Northland. Herr Kringle has been preparing a year for his capitalistic/materialistic onslaught which has been funded by American backed multinational corporations. Vice President Cheney, who has been linked by an anonymous source, is not available for comment.Of course Herr Kringle will, as in times past completely overlook the Palestinian children as he creates a surplus of waste in our already overburdened global landfills. This is Christiane Amanpour, CNN.

[keysguy]

Merry Christmas to all!

[Tennessee_Bob]

Millenium hand and shrimp...

[vetvetdoug]

I'm in North Mississippi and its cold as its ever been. I got my Krag Rifle well cleaned. I wonder who has the most points....Donner, Blitzen, Prancer, Rudolph....

Merry Christmas...I will let you know how I do tonight or tomorrow am.

[GRRRRR]

O Holy Night

Christmas Music performed by the Naden Band of Maritime Forces Pacific of the Canadian Navy from Esquimalt, British Columbia.