Is this the OCTOBER SURPRISE? Yawn. Kerry's Goose is still cooked
by JohnHuang2
After news reports that Bush plans to bring back the draft by December, end Social Security by January, spread the flu to everyone by March, triple gas prices by May, end stem cell research by June, put everyone in a wheelchair by July, then bring on Armageddon by August, is it any wonder Bush still leads in polls? In the latest Gallup, asked whom they will vote for next Tuesday, 51% said they'll vote Bush, 46% said they'll vote Kerry, 1% said they'll vote Nader, and 4% said, 'What vote next Tuesday?' (Kerry hopes to win by drawing all the undecideds -- all 4 or 5 of 'em.)
None of the charges aimed at Bush seem to stick, so the New York Times and CBS News, Reporting For Duty with a shocking blockbuster fax from Kinko's, revealed on Monday that Iraq, a vast munitions dump, had this vast munitions dump which incompetent Bush failed to personally stand guard over while invading Iraq, allowing looters to loot as troops stopped looters from looting Iraqi museums which the New York Times said was more important than guarding munitions dumps. The Times notes that the munitions once stored there, which the U.N. says haven't been found so they still exist, are the kind of explosives Iraqi 'insurgents' could use to detonate WMDs which the U.N. says don't exist because they haven't been found. (Think that's scary? Imagine this stuff falling into the hands of terrorists here -- terrorists seeking revenge for Iraq, amid election season, targeting, say, Bush campaign offices everywhere. But enough about Democrat protesters.) The munitions dump, further noted the Times in a story since discredited, was central to Saddam's plan to build nukes that the Times says Saddam had no plans to build. (The Times then proceeded to accuse Bush of using scare tactics.)
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Pouncing on the story since discredited, Kerry, a Good Closer who isn't Closing, accused Bush of losing the war on munitions dumps, blasting Bush as mentally incompetent for putting "our troops at risk and (putting) this country at greater risk" to a country which Kerry says posed no risk to this country, asserting that if he were president, he'd have guarded the munitions dump in a Swift Boat himself, firing spitballs at looters to ward 'em off -- in between Goose hunting trips to Ohio and healing the crippled. Or, better yet, he'd have left the 380 gazillion-ton stockpile of nuisance explosives in the very competent hands of Saddam Hussein. (Kerry denies this means he'd have left Saddam Hussein in charge of Iraq -- just the nuisance HMX and RDX explosives.) Democrats note that these plastic explosives -- popular with terrorists -- proves Iraq had no links to terrorists.
Campaigning in Wisconsin Tuesday, Kerry accused Bush of lacking a comprehensive strategy for victory over munitions dumps and of failing "in his fundamental obligation as commander in chief to make America safe" by securing every munitions dump in Iraq, which the U.S. should not have invaded because it's the Wrong War, Wrong Place, Wrong Time. With 380 tons of missing explosives out there, "His Iraq misjudgments put our soldiers at risk," Kerry says of Bush in a new ad, adding, 'Oh -- have you heard about those missing explosives?'
(Kerry trolls for headlines every morning to launch his latest attack. 'The truth is, President Bush has never leveled with the American people about . . . Mount. St. Helen . . .')
Kerry, who complains that troops sent to Iraq distract from the hunt for al-Qaeda (which would rather go hunting in lower Manhattan but can't because of troops sent to Iraq), wondered why -- WHY!!!! -- in light of the Times story, Bush had not sent more troops to Iraq. (Kerry also complains that Bush's reliance on troops in the hunt for terrorists is kinda dumb because troops can never stop terrorists dead in their tracks like subpoenas and search warrants can. And holding Summits.) But mere hours after the launch of this October Surprise, the October Surprise was discredited. (CBS says they still vouch for its authenticity.) But PowerlineBlog.com reports that the "Third Infantry Division had reached and inspected al-Qaqaa by April 3, 2003." Powerline's source? CBS News!. The CBS piece, U.S. Searches 'Suspicious' Iraqi Site, thoroughly demolishes CBS and its October Surprise. NBC's Jim Miklaszewski reported Tuesday that the IAEA had searched the site just before the war and was unable to "verify that RDX was still at the compound." The missing explosives went missing before warmonger Bush Rushed to War. (Retooled Kerry campaign slogan: Vote for me -- I would've invaded sooner than that slacker Bush!)
Even as the story unraveled late Monday, the New York Times stuck to its guns, splashing, Iraq Explosives Become Issue in Campaign on its front page, right next to an article headlined, Dewey Wins!.
So where are the missing explosives? Probably buried in the same place as news of the Afghan elections.
But there's one thing even the media won't be able to ignore or 'bury': Kerry's massive defeat next Tuesday.
Anyway, that's...
My two cents
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