Wow -- What A Nice Birthday Gift For Bush
by JohnHuang2
If I may, I'd like to open this new Documentary of mine with a few observations. First of all, did you notice the image he projected throughout? It was one of sheer arrogance. I mean, the guy actually thinks he's president. He dismissed the proceedings blithely as nothing but theater to help Bush's reelection. He insisted Bush is the real criminal here. His words were pure demagoguery. And bombast. With those bags under his eyes, he looked gawd-awful, too -- like some hobo who'd been sleeping under a bridge. He looked scrawny and haggard. Yet, he was pompous and condescending -- he came across as a real snob. He was patronizing. He loved to talk down. And being disdainful, as if others were beneath him or somehow unworthy. Unfreakin' believable. What a piece of work!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But enough on John Kerry.
So, Democrat presidential hopeful John Kerry (clinically proven to kill votes by millions on eye contact) has finally chosen a running mate (somebody finally said 'yes'), choosing John Edwards (you may have heard of him), Democrat Senator from North Carolina. (A Senator/Senator, John/John ticket. Now tell me this isn't thinking out of the box). The move to pick a running mate takes a load off Barbra Streisand and Neil Diamond, allowing them to spend more time at the rest home. (Even Michael Moore can now go back to being just a regular mental patient). The selection of Edwards for Veep makes the Kerry-Edwards ticket a virtual shoo-in for second place this November. (A Gigolo/Shyster ticket does wonders for the party's image problems, too).
Though some election experts say Edwards -- or practically anyone Kerry may have picked for Veep after McCain turned down the job -- comes across as second choice, the Kerryites strongly deny ever actually making a formal offer to McCain, blaming leaks from the Bush camp as the reason McCain rejected their formal offer. (In fairness, there could be another, more logical explanation: Kerry actually did decide to make a formal offer, before he decided against it). Besides, Kerry always had Edwards on a short leash, er, short list of candidates for Veep.
The announcement comes as the Kerry campaign reports having raised a total so far of over $175 million. (Kerry's campaign has raised so much money, rumblings have begun he may marry the thing).
So why pick Edwards and not, say, Mr. Eyebrows (Dick Gephardt)? In Kerry's view, the former ambulance-chaser has the most important qualification -- he polls better than Gephardt for Veep choice. The only downside to Edwards is that he lacks the second most important qualification: Ability to step into the top job if Kerry can't perform his job as president. (Which, in Kerry's case, means the moment Kerry's sworn in as president). Edwards -- a hairspray away from the presidency? Reporter Donald Lambro of the Washington Times notes that even Edwards' "home-state supporters acknowledge his background leaves something to be desired in a vice president, let alone a potential president. In their minds, his strengths lay elsewhere..." (such as doing those Breck Girl commercials?)
On the other hand, Lambro adds, "no one in (Kerry's) high command doubts (Edwards) has the political skills to energize the party." (During the primaries, Edwards' political skills so energized the party that he energized all the way to first place finish in one primary, in neighboring South Carolina, besting political titans like Al Sharpton and Howard Dean, even edging out that all-time favorite of Southerners, Massachusetts' John Kerry. (Elsewhere, Edwards went on to rack up an impressive string of distant second and third and fourth place finishes after almost everyone else dropped out). Edwards. Great campaigner. Just couldn't drum up many votes. But it all comes back to the bottom line. Which is? The problem with choosing Edwards is that he doesn't bring balance to the ticket. It lacks that certain diversity every ticket should have: At least one candidate qualified to be president.
Then again, experts say, with Edwards you've got personality, charisma, vigor, youth, ability to connect -- someone who actually looks and acts human. What an incredible contrast to his opponent! His opponent John Kerry.
Democrats say it's silly to think the party needed an 'exciting' Veep pick like Edwards to rally the party faithful, noting that President George W. Bush has already done that. (That's why every top Democrat and his sister said Edwards would be a strong addition to the ticket, noting he would do wonders to rally the party faithful). They also note how pre-handover news had dragged Bush's poll numbers down. (Yes -- way, way down ... as far down as Kerry's level). But can the Breck Girl smile into the camera and tell voters convincingly that he told two friends how he got his thick, shiny, bouncy hair from Heinz ketchup, and urge 'em to tell two friends who will tell two friends who will tell two friends . . . ? And will this give Metrosexual Kerry a thick, shiny, easy-to-manage bounce in the polls, or will the flowing locks of the Breck Girl keep the race locked in a dead-heat?
Republican reaction to the Veep pick was swift. (I was so excited when I heard the announcement, I burst out the front door and frantically ran up and down the sidewalk dozens of times. Then I woke up). The GOP aims to discredit Edwards, untested on national security, by painting him as untested on national security, mulling whether a one-term feather-weight like Edwards might provoke Cheney in debate into crude outbursts -- outbursts of laughter. (Kerry says Edwards is the most qualified and experienced man for the job, and that looks, money and charisma had nothing to do with it -- take it from a Gigolo! Next he'll tell us he married Teresa for brains and beauty).
But even some Democrats are worried about Edwards -- that he might've not been the strongest pick. Did you hear what one Democrat -- a former rival in the primaries, no less -- told CNN off the record? He said this about Edwards' preparedness and gravitas: "You have to decide, in looking at the records between us, who do you think can stand up to George Bush? Who do you think has the capacity to convince the nation that we as Democrats have the ability to lead the world and make us safer?" He added sarcastically that "I don't know if John Edwards was out of diapers (during Vietnam) or not ..." Oh wait -- that was John Kerry speaking glowingly of Edwards back in January.
The scene Tuesday morning in Pittsburgh where Kerry made the announcement was quite remarkable, though. "I am determined that we reach out . . . that we speak to the heart of America," Kerry told a crowd of supporters. Picking Edwards is Kerry's way of showing he's serious about reaching out -- a privileged billionaire reaching out to a less privileged millionaire. Very touching. (Who says Kerry's out of touch with average, everyday yacht owners?) In Kerry-Edwards, I'm grabbed by this very stirring, tear-jerking portrait of two Americas: Rich and filthy rich. The haves and the haves in-a-half -- all coming together, finally. Quite moving, isn't it?
So, can the dour, sulky, grim, boring, sullen liberal from Massachusetts ride Edwards' boyish looks all the way to the White House? Experts say Edwards, who ran for president when he realized voters in North Carolina would not re-elect him, can help broaden the ticket's appeal in the South, like with voters in North Carolina. (Al Gore swept a bunch of Southern states, remember? I don't either). You know, come to think of it, picking Edwards was a nice -- very, very nice -- Birthday gift for Bush. Thank you, Kerry -- how thoughtful!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And Happy Birthday, Mr. President!
Anyway, that's...
My two cents
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
