Ground hog killing wife

Today | Me

[sparkomatic]

I'm at work, 50 miles from the home 20. The wife called and said, "Julie [my SIL] just called and there is a ground hog in the tree in her back yard. It may be sick or something."

I said well what do you want me to do about it? I ain't driving 100 miles round trip just to dispatch a ground hog that thinks it's a coon.

She said, "Well I think I can do it, but I need you to tell me how to open the safe. I need you to tell me which gun to use. I need you to tell me how to operate the gun. etc."

I talked her through opening the safe. Got it on the first try.

I contemplated having her use my 12 ga. coach model stoger but, I thought that might hurt her. Afterall, she's kind of scared of guns. I thought it would be best if she used the Ruger 10/22. Only problem is that she's just in the edge of a little town. I explained she'd want to point the gun in such a way as the stray bullets would zing out into the woods rather than into town. No, there's no "no firing guns" ordnance there. When I say small town, I mean it.

So she's digging through the safe trying to determine which gun is the 10/22. "Here's one that's black with brown wood and a camo sling."

No that's my slug gun.

Here's one in a case.

No, that's the coach gun.

Here's one that's black with wood and has carving on it.

No, that's the 270 Winchester.

Oh, here it is. It says Ruger on it. It's kind of little and has a scope on it.

Yep, that's it.

OK, what bullets do I use.

There should be some magazines laying on a shelf with bullets already in them.

Here's some. They are grey.

No, those are for the AR-15. You should see some little black cube shaped magazines with little bullets in them.

Oh, here's some little bitty bullets.

No, those are probably the 22 shorts.

Keith, I don't even know how to load this gun. I better call dad.

No, you can do this. Afterall, you were in the army.

Then it dawned on me. Michael has a Rossi matched pair on the top shelf. Shelley, grab Michaels gun. It's easy to use.

OK. I've got it.

Good. Put it together. Use the .22 barrell, not the .410 barrell. I talked her through assembling the rifle. She actually, began attaching the .410 barrel at first. That probably should have been the best choice, but it's actually got some good kick to it.

Then I talked her through how to use the gun.

She found some ammo that actually said .22LR on the box. Probably my box of CCI's.

She said, "OK, I'm going over there now. Wish me luck."

I had a meeting in the meantime. About an hour later I called back.

She said, "I did it." First shot was just behind the ear. Then I shot him again, that one knocked him out of the tree.

"Then," she says, "John Boy went over and hit him with a spoon to make sure he was dead."

I'm so proud of her.

[nothingnew]

Ask any rancher,cattleman...he'll tell you.

FMCDH

[Eaker]

It's like badge of honor. LOL!!

It's like badger of honor. LOL!!

[Eaker]

Groundhog ping!!

[nothingnew]

Ask any rancher,cattleman...he'll tell you.

FMCDH

[Jasper]

Mmmmmm.......Groundhog

[MJemison]

We call them woodchucks around here, and yes they are a dangerous nuisance. They dig enormous holes in the fields and pastures which cause problems for the farm machinery and for any large livestock unfortunate enough to step into one. They do carry disease, and even the healthy ones have an impressive assortment of ticks and fleas. They are varmints.

[sparkomatic]

You're sick.

We all are. Look at this web site.
http://www.cci-ammunition.com/game/default.htm

[lowbridge]

Q. Do groundhogs climb trees? Yes, with our sharp claws we can climb trees. Although we prefer to stay close to the ground, we will occasionally climb trees for food or to escape predators.

Wow. Not only can they climb trees but they can talk too!

[lowbridge]

I was born on Feb 2, which is why they call it groundhog day.

If I dont stay out of your tree, will your wife come gunning for me too?

[sticker]

Very large amounts of your favorite malt beverage, PBR used to be the most popular.:) Oh, you meant bbq sauce not bbqer sauce. In that case either a hot pepper laced vinger sauce would work very well or if you prefer a tomato based sauce would work with enough peppers

[sticker]

Biting your son?

[Shryke]

Did you happen to say........møøsë?????

[Shryke]

Besides, it's legal and fun.

ROTFLMAO!

[Shryke]

No, that's typing. Hardly impressive.

[Ghengis]

You and I live in the same neck of the woods. Between the groundhogs, racoons and the coyotes, I don't know which animals are swarming worse this spring.

[sparkomatic]

I don't know exactly what woods you live in. I haven't seen too much coyotewise. Raccoons are plentiful, though. So are possums. I'll most likely shoot some of them, too. Just to piss off a few liberals.

[Huck]

Sounds like fun. My wife would LOVE that. If you ever get a chance to snap a few pics of Wilbur eating apples, let me know. My wife would love to see it.

[Squantos]

Ya'll are nuts !...........:o)

Stay safe !

[Huck]

[Squantos]

Good lord man are you insane ?!?!?!??! You gave the little woman the combo to yer gun safe ?????? That's like tellin the kids where yer secret stash of fig newtons are hidden !!.......what the heck were you thinkin......:o)

Great Story.......Stay Safe !