Posted on 04/09/2004 6:26:21 PM PDT by scripter
I am still in a state of shock; I have been grieving for days. My son, Jamiel Terry, was paid $5,000 by Out magazine (to appear April 20, 2004, on newsstands) to write a story about being Randall Terry's homosexual son. I pray my following words help other grieving parents and serve as a warning to moms and dads of small children to be unflinchingly and unashamedly diligent to protect their children from predators, and bring a reality check to those exploiting my son.
First of all, I love my son. Jamiel is incredibly gifted. He is articulate and handsome. He sings like an angel, he plays the piano, he's a great cook, and he's a great debater. He would make a powerful lawyer and a formidable politician. People like him. I love him. I've poured 16 years of my life into him.
In March of 1988, my then-wife and I took Jamiel in as a foster child when he was 8 years old. We also took in his baby sister (almost 3 years old)) and their older sister (12 years old). We adopted him and his younger sister when he was nearly 15 and she was 9. He came to us as a deeply troubled boy, from a very dark home. He was literally born in jail.
Tragically, by the time we got him as a foster child, he had already learned a lifestyle of deceit from his surroundings and had been a victim of crimes and treacheries that would mar him for life. I knew of some of those things when we got him and have learned more over the years. My hope was that by providing a loving, safe home, his life would be spared the path it would inevitably take if he remained in those surroundings. Unfortunately, my hopes and prayers were not realized.
My son's teen years became a mixed stream of happy times mingled with half-truths, dishonesty and a double life. His behavior grew worse and worse in college, culminating with the story in Out magazine.
For the uninformed, Out magazine specializes in bringing homosexuals "out of the closet." Out is committed to the homosexual agenda – homosexual marriage, special "civil rights" for homosexuals, promoting the fallacy that their sexual activities are normal and even laudable. Their agenda is shameless. My son was offered $5,000 to "write" a story about me and his life with me and my family. However, much of the story was written by Out's editor who put words in my son's mouth to accomplish the magazine's agenda.
For me, the most horrifying part of the story is my son's admission: "I did have numerous sexual encounters with my friends, usually during sleepovers at my parents' house" and "I was home from boarding school in my old bedroom at my parents' house in Windsor, N.Y., where my friend 'Johnny' and I had just finished fooling around ... we had been having sex for ages. ..."
I am so grieved and sorry for those boys and their parents. Those parents trusted us; they believed their sons were safe at our home – so had I. I was wrong. I still am in a state of shock. Please, parents, learn from this tragedy.
Frankly, so much of the story is inaccurate (times, dates, events) it would take too much space to correct it. But worse yet is that the picture the story paints of my son is based in fraud.
For example, the story states, "I was baptized Catholic and raised Protestant, and I later returned to the Roman Catholic Church." This is not true. Jamiel has never been confirmed; he does not believe in nor go to confession; he does not believe in many Catholic dogmas; He rejects papal authority and Catholic teaching on family issues.
The story states: "My father seems to believe that the fact that I'm an adopted child may help explain why I'm gay – not because of the adoption process itself but perhaps because of things that my have occurred before I was adopted at the age of 5." As I stated, Jamiel was adopted when he was nearly 15, not 5. To gloss over the tragic events and surroundings Jamiel was rescued from at age 8 is deceitful. (Social Services took the children because of prostitution, drugs and deeds committed against them.) Many homosexuals want to ignore the causal links to their sexual addiction; they want us to believe their homosexuality is genetic, not behavioral. They're "made this way."
The story stated, "My father is still trying to get me to go to a three-month retreat to be 'delivered' from homosexuality." This is also not true. Jamiel has repeatedly asked me to pay for him to go to "Love in Action," which offers sound clinical, in-patient therapy to those who want freedom – and they have a great success rate with homosexuals. Even after the article was done, he asked me to help. I have offered to pay for the in-patient care, and the offer still stands.
Probably the most painful part for me as a dad is that my son prostituted my name for $5,000: He sold out our family's privacy and private discussions for cold cash. Can you imagine a family member doing that to you?
He knows that the only reason Out, and now CNN, (and God knows who else before it's over) want to talk with him is because he's "Randall Terry's son." He knows he is going to get his 15 minutes of fame because he's the adopted son of a high profile Christian leader who has fought against homosexual marriage.
Adding pain to pain, he told CNN and a journalist from the Washington Post that he is no longer welcome in my home because he is a homosexual. That is not true. I have had him in my home for many days after knowing he was a homosexual.
But when I saw the Out article, I went to Charlotte, N.C., (where he is now) to tell him I love him, and how hurt I was that he betrayed our families privacy, and that he was not welcome in my home right now – not because of his homosexuality, but because he could sell us out again. At any point, he could come for a holiday, make mental notes and find another buyer for another story. I have a great wife, a teenage daughter and two small boys; I will not let that type of intrusion happen again.
My son is being paraded around as the latest homosexual "trophy" that had the guts to "come out." What they aren't telling you – and this grieves me to my core – is that by anyone's standard – homosexual or heterosexual – my son's life is in shambles. He was recently arrested for DWI; he is knowingly writing bad checks on a closed bank account; he dropped out of school; he doesn't have a job (and refuses to get one); he bounces from house to house living off other people; he's racked-up huge bills for friends and family that he cannot pay; he's been taken to court by former friends to get him to pay money he owed them; he's lied to his friends, telling them his "famous dad" was going to send him money to pay for his debts (I get calls or e-mails from college friends looking for money); he has "borrowed" money from countless numbers of my friends; he has a trail of wrecked friendships and family relationships because of deceit, money fraud and crossed boundaries – a mirror image of the home he was in from birth to 8.
I am a father in anguish; my son is a young man in crisis who needs intervention and therapy, not heady interviews with CNN. And Out magazine is despicable for their participation in a sham and exploiting my son for their own political agenda. If my son is their latest "hero," we should wonder how many more of their homosexual leaders and trophies that they present as "model citizens" have lives that are this unraveled.
Let all who read the Out story, or any other that spins off of it, know that the story about my son is laced with fraud and deceit from beginning to end. And please pray for my son's redemption, and pray for our family's healing.
If each of these allegations is true, there is nothing wrong with exposing them in defense of one's family. The character of the boy needs to be reported along with the betrayal of his family for money. Anyone who would sell out their family for money is the worst possible person.
But, that was then.
It may be because of this or that or the other thing, but besides being homosexual, the kid is a bum, a leech, a conman, a lowlife.
It's not surprising that this bad seed would take 5K to cr-p on his father in writing.
I'm really sorry for Randall Terry, he did his best and he got this in return.
Nor had I. But, Randall Terry is a name that NAARL knows. No doubt, THEY will be all over this outing. I admire Randy's getting out in front of it.
Here are some facts about Randall Terry:
February 1, 2000
Please Pray for Randall Terry
Many of us became involved in the pro-life movement through the courageous actions and writings of young warrior for Christ, Randall Terry. God's call and gifting upon this man to call the Church of Jesus Christ to repentance and move her to the very "gates of hell" were obvious for all to see. I have personally been greatly blessed by his ministry and moved to join him in the Gospel battle that is savaging our nation. He fathered many of us into the Kingdom of God and into the pro-life movement.
Therefore, it is with a profound sadness that I report to you that Randall has separated from his wife and family, from his church, and from all of us who have been running the race of faith with him. It is a self-chosen path. He has been confronted time and again by those who truly love him (wonderful friends who have been battle tested over time to be true to Christ and to him) to repent and return to his first love, his wife, and his church - all to no avail! Randall has dragons to slay and funds to raise! All the while his family, his church, his testimony, and the children he has been ordained to protect, are being slain by the real dragon of his soul.
The steps of Matthew 18 have been meticulously followed. Many precious friends on several different occasions have sought to restore our brother. “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." Proverbs 27:6. Unfortunately there are those who would rather kiss Randall than love him enough to wound him with the truth that, if heeded, would bring healing. They are making excuses for him and enabling him to live a lie. I speak specifically of the Charismatic Episcopal Church whose leaders have, for whatever reason, deemed it appropriate to accept Randall into its fellowship knowing full well the censure and church discipline Randall is presently undergoing.
When I was first made aware of Randall and Cindy's separation and other personal problems several months ago, I immediately contacted Pastor Dan Little and have been in consistent communication with him since. Pastor Dan has been the Terrys' pastor for the past 15 years and he continues to care for Cindy and the kids while dad is gone (slaying dragons?). Randall has always given great credit to Pastor Dan as being a mighty man of God who is unafraid to stand for Christ no matter the cost. He has often praised his pastor publicly and made statement that he (Randall) is under the authority of a very Godly man.
I have spoken to all the leaders of Rescue concerning this matter in November 1999 via telephone conference. It is now my duty to inform you of our efforts. I am enclosing a letter Pastor Little sent this January to all who were inquiring about Randall's status in his church.
To: The inquiring supporters of Randall Terry
From: Pastor Dan Little - The Church at Pierce Creek 1980-1998/ The Landmark Church to date
Because of the number of calls asking for my perspective on Randall Terry I have undertaken to write the following:
It is with great sadness that I write to inform you of recent events as regards Randall Terry. As many of you know I was his pastor for 15 years and I considered him to be one of my closest friends - a peer in the ministry.
Last August Randall left his wife of 18 years, set up an alternative residence in Windsor, and has told numbers of persons that he intends to divorce, annul or otherwise break covenant with his wife. This we earnestly pray he does not do. We have waited these many months to write in the sincere hope of seeing a change in his intentions. Many of his longtime friends (with whom he no longer associates) are shocked and bewildered that a man who has traveled the country pleading with Christian people to think and act biblically is now thinking and acting so anti-biblically on a number of fronts. When asked why he is doing what he is doing to his family, the reason that he gives is that he isn’t happy being married to Cindy.
It was in the Spring of 1997 when I noticed what to me were signs of Randall's spiritual deterioration - chiefly anger and self-will which manifested itself in what I would characterize as a lack of purity in speech and lifestyle. By August of 1998 I asked him to resign his long held position of Elder, and by August of 1999, having been told by him of his intentions to move out of his house and leave his wife, I asked him to resign as a member of the board altogether. In November of 1999 the church wrote a formal letter of censure (included below) and admonishment, calling him to repent, and dismissing him from the membership of the church as per his request to withdraw his membership.
Cindy (Randall's wife) and children are still with us. We are offering them as much emotional and spiritual support as we are able, but what they really need is for Randall to repent and return to loving his family. Splitting the children's time between two residences is certainly not an acceptable substitute for a Biblical patriarch-father, a father who trains his children by word and example to know what it means to think and act Biblically. Nowhere is such training more important than in showing them what it means to be a husband who loves his wife as Christ loved the Church and gave His life for her (see Ephesians 5:20 ff). It is through the fathers, more than through any other person, that children learn (or don't learn) about sacrificial love - love that dies to self, love that saves.
Most of Randall's former associates, while attempting for many months to be gracious and kind to him, have simply not been able to support him in what he is now doing. He has rejected their counsel and accused many long time friends and supporters of treachery for their attempts to speak correction into his life as regards his announced plans to break covenant with his wife, Cindy. Christ Himself assures us that biblical love is not the kind of love that supports or stands idly by sinful actions. Rev 3:19 "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent." Where kindness and mercy fail, godly love will reprove, rebuke, correct and admonish. Many of Randall's longtime friends have made use of the full orb of godly counsel, from loving kindness to rebuke. This we have done as a church as well. This I have done as a pastor, and for my efforts on Randall's behalf I have been vilified, slandered, defamed, and denounced by him. His reviling remarks have failed to do anything but to bring further damage and shame to his own reputation.
Meanwhile it seems to many observers that Randall is altogether a different person than the one we knew and supported so many years ago. He still uses much of the old rhetoric, still attempts to fund raise as if he were the same man, but he himself does not appear to be the same man. The Psalmist wrote: "When with rebukes you correct a man for iniquity, you make his beauty melt away like a moth; surely every man is a vapor. Selah" I believe Randall is under the gracious but difficult dealings of God.
Please pray for Cindy and the children as they endure through this time. Please pray for Randall that God would change his heart toward his wife and toward the family over which God has called him to be the head.
Letter of censure:
In keeping with the language and intent of chapter 30 of the Westminster Confession we write: "Church censures are necessary for the reclaiming and gaining of offending brethren, for the deterring of others of the like offenses, for purging out of that leaven which might infect the whole lump, for vindicating the honor of Christ and the holy profession of the Gospel, and for preventing the wrath of God which might justly fall upon the church if they should suffer His covenant and the seals thereof to be profaned by obstinate offenders."
Letter of Church Censure: Randall Terry, November 6, 1999
1. For leaving his wife in preparation to divorce, annul or otherwise dissolve their Christian marriage, and for his unwillingness to repent of this sin we do hereby censure him.
2. For a pattern of repeated sinful relationships and conversations with both single and married women we do hereby censure him.
3. For presenting a letter from his attorney threatening legal action against the Landmark Church, thus threatening to place the Church of Christ under civil authority for performing their Christian duty toward him we do hereby censure him.
4. In addition to those things mentioned above we are concerned that Randall's personal and theological transformation over the last three years has left him altogether a different Randall Terry than the one who now solicits funds from his donors. For example, in sending out a recent fund raising letter he wrote, "I know that you believe what I believe." This lacks integrity since the vast majority of his donors have no idea what he now believes nor the liberties and license in which he now walks, and in our opinion would hardly agree to support him if they did. For this we admonish him to cease soliciting funds until such time as his public persona and his true manner of living are known to be the same.
For all the reasons above, but not for any single one of these reasons, the undersigned Elders and Members of the Landmark Church Board do hereby censure and admonish Randall Terry, and further declare that for conduct far short of Christian standards of behavior he shall be kept from our communion table, and we further judge that he is not a fit candidate for communion in any true confessing Christian Church until such time as he repents of his sin. "For he who eats and drinks in an unworthy manner eats and drinks judgment to himself, not discerning the Lord's body." (1Corinthians 11:29 NKJ).
Finally, being fully aware that the Landmark Church exists not independently, but within the context of the entire body of Christ, should Randall Terry desire to appeal this our judgment we are willing to stand before such Board of Appeals as might be formed by selected and agreed upon Clergy of the area in which we and Randall Terry live and function. Reverend Doug Hill, a long time friend of Randall Terry's and a long time resident and pastor in this locale is agreeable to oversee this matter.
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I spoke with Randall in November of 1999 in Dallas as he was preparing for a Leadership Institute Seminar. We had a wonderful talk and he assured me that he would be pulling back in all ministry areas at the beginning of the New Year. It was my sincere belief that he was going to get alone with God and allow Him to do business with his heart
Since January, however, he has announced possible plans to run for U.S. Senate, he is storming the gates of the homosexual agenda in Vermont, he is selling his mailing (donor) list, and is engaged in yet another fund raiser. He never had nor does he now have any intention of pulling back. As long as he can find those who will support him he will continue on. He will continue to neglect the covenant he made with his wife by being “brave” in other areas. Brothers and sisters, character does count in God’s economy! Because we fight the good fight in one area does not excuse us to sin all the more in other areas .
Leaders have the responsibility to lay down their liberties so as not to cause others to stumble. It is a call upon all of our lives but it is especially true of Christian leaders. Randall’s new-found “liberties” in speech and action have caused the consternation of many and stumbling of more than a few. He is in desperate need right now of hearing and receiving the rebuke of our Lord into his life. His wife Cindy, his children, his pastor, his friends, and most importantly Jesus Himself love Randall Terry. We are all praying for his repentance and return to the Church of Jesus Christ. Therefore we will in no way finance his continued waywardness nor will we enable him to continue in his willful separation from his Lord, his family, his church, and the children he has been called to protect. We cannot make him do right but we will speak the truth to him in love and we pray that you do the same.
It is our fervent prayer that one day we will be able to hear Randall speak the same words the Apostle Paul spoke as he ended the Scripture we began with:
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So, Terry dumps his wife and kids for a younger woman, then agonizes over his kid's conflicted sexuality?
The creep should look in the mirror!
The kid was adopted at 8
They are, they are.
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