Michelle Malkin: The weird world of Gwyneth Paltrow

TownHall.com ^ | Wednesday, January 21, 2004 | by Michelle Malkin

[JohnHuang2]

Gwyneth Paltrow, the fashionable blond actress who once chopped off her hair to look exactly like ex-boyfriend Brad Pitt and who showed up at the Oscars a few years ago in a transparent Goth-meets-Heidi costume, has some nerve calling anybody "weird."

Yet, there she was in the pages of Britain’s Glamour magazine last week, declaring that America is "too weird." Now, if Gwynnie had been referring to the bizarre spectacles of Michael Jackson gyrating atop his SUV, Britney Spears stumbling down the wedding aisle, and Howard Dean going ape-wild in Iowa, she might have had a point. But that’s not who she had in mind. Explaining why she’s planning on raising her first child in the United Kingdom instead of the United States -- she is four months pregnant and living in London with her new husband, British musician Chris Martin -- the actress noted: "At the moment there's a weird, over-patriotic atmosphere over there, like, 'We're number one and the rest of the world doesn't matter.’"

Pity poor Paltrow. Having grown up in her privileged little bubble of "gypsy of the world" artisans, this delicate thespian must tremble with unbearable fright at the thought of her little one being accidentally exposed to Americans who fly the American flag on their front porches even when it’s not Independence Day. I can’t imagine the horror Paltrow must experience when the National Anthem is played within earshot or the disgust she must feel when she sees American soldiers in uniform, flashing "number one" signs, as they defend Paltrow’s freedom to trash her country while sipping tea along the Thames.

How positively creepy, Paltrow must have thought to herself while sunning herself on Valentino’s yacht off the coast of Majorca, that there are so many of us in America who actually do believe this is the greatest nation in the world, who wake up each morning grateful that our parents and grandparents left their own native lands to pursue their dreams in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

How utterly scary that there are so many of us unenlightened heathens who actually believe the words of the U.S. Constitution (as opposed to Norman Lear and the ACLU’s talking points).

How absolutely chilling that America is still home to Americans who recite the unabridged version of the Pledge of Allegiance.

How absolutely strange that most of us have never faked a British accent -- except, perhaps, when teaching our children about the tyranny of King George III.

"I think Bush is such an embarrassment to America. He doesn't take the rest of the world at all into consideration," Paltrow was quoted by the Scottish Daily Record of Glasgow last year. "It all seems to be for him and his friends to keep getting richer at the expense of a nation, at the expense of the environment. It's like a full-scale assault." This from an eco-hypocrite who appears in environmental propaganda ads with fellow actress Cameron Diaz touting energy conservation -- while driving a Mercedes-Benz SUV paid for with her box-office windfalls from all those gauche Americans who plunk down their hard-earned cash to see her movies.

"I love America and I completely stand behind America," Gwynnie said last spring, before she wed her America-hating rockstar husband, who had declared at an awards show that "We're all going to die when George Bush has his way." If this is Paltrow’s idea of American patriotism, let’s be glad that she will be teaching it to her child overseas, in the company of so many other celebrity expatriates from Madonna to Johnny Depp.

Good riddance, Hollyweirdos. And God bless America.

©2003 Creators Syndicate, Inc.

[JohnHuang2]

Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Quote of the Day by MJY1288

[dfwgator]

Gwyneth saying that America is weird, yet she decides to live in a country that still has the archaic concept of a monarchy in the 21st century.

[Naspino]

It is good that we are exporting our most serious WMD's to other countries.

[Cboldt]

Good riddance, Hollyweirdos.

And may the public develop the good sense to ignore the stupid sots.

[T Lady]

She'll be doing informercials soon. Another has-been actress on the trash heap of Hollywood history.

-Regards, T.

[jigsaw]

It is good that we are exporting our most serious WMD's to other countries.

WMD's  --   Women of Moronic Dimensions

[Mo1]

Good riddance, Hollyweirdos. And God bless America

AMEN!

[ServesURight]

The ONLY reason this twit is in show business is that her dad has powerful connections to Steven Spielberg. Otherwise, she'd be making coffee at a greasy spoon somewhere off an interstate.

[dfwgator]

Too bad she still wasn't dating Ben Affleck, then we could have gotten him out of the country as well.

[Extremely Extreme Extremist]

Why in the Hell can't these Hollywood ignoramuses shut up?

These people won life's lottery and are millionaires without a care in the world. All they have to do is pretend to be someone else and read what other people wrote. But they're insecure, because they want to be liked by everyone and believe that other people care about them. The 9/11 telethon that was broadcast on nearly every channel is a good example of this.

[proust]

"Gwyneth saying that America is weird, yet she decides to live in a country that still has the archaic concept of a monarchy in the 21st century."

Of course. It's the only place she has a chance of being recognized as the "princess" she's convinced herself she is.. she probably thinks she's the next Grace Kelly.

[Sabatier]

I think you mean her dad had connections - he passed away not too long ago.

[des]

Class/caste system...better for her, I would think.

[giotto]

Too bad I can't stand her or her wierd movies. I can't boycott something I already avoid.

[ClancyJ]

Well, surely she will have the sense to leave America and find the ideal place for her family. America does not need or want those that are embarrassed by a President that fights for America first.

She does not deserve to be a part of this beautiful country and its people.

[HHFi]

Yes, but her dad was a prominent director and her mother is actress Blythe Danner, so she definitely grew up in a world of wealth and privilege, with many doors open to her that other actresses of greater talent can only dream of getting through. Fortunately, it's not necessary to boycott Gwynnie's movies because her script choices ("Bounce," "Sylvia," "View from the Top," etc.) have made avoiding her movies an automatic response for 99.9% of moviegoers.

[Mel Gibson]

I think that the spindle queen has been studying for her pap test.

She can't even act for crying out loud.

[MS.BEHAVIN]

Hello My Friend,
Good to see you fighting the good fight!

Paltrow..Good Lord, who cares?
Marrying a woman for her good looks is like buying the house for the paint...

If the foundation is rotten, it will soon come to light..
How she can do this without compunction is beyond me..
Good Riddance!!

Ms.B

[JohnHuang2]

G'evening backatya, my friend :-) Great to 'see' ya!

[vikingchick]

I've watched her in a few movies. Honestly, she's as bland as bland could be. A bland blonde. Bland like the film on top of a latte that's been sitting too long because you went to the restroom and it was just sitting there, unattended.

Bland as staring at a stack of junk mail that you have piled up by the front door, uncertain whether to throw it out or shred it, so you walk away and hope it goes away, but it sits there to torment you another day.