How You Can Become a Metrosexual (ick alert)

Netscape ^ | 12/28/2003

[Utah Girl]

There is no one hipper than a metrosexual. A who you say? A metrosexual is a straight, urban male who is eager to embrace and even show off his feminine side. That means he gets expensive haircuts, wears designer suits, and uses $40 face cream. And thanks to a certain type of male celebrity, it's now cool for a man to own 43 pairs of Bruno Magli shoes, wear moisturizer, and paint his nails. You're not born a metrosexual. You become one by learning and living by basic rules of fashion, culture, and etiquette. Some say the metrosexual is the new male ideal. (Not to put any pressure on you.) If you're at a loss as to how to do that, you can read all about it in the first-ever guidebook, "The Metrosexual Guide To Style: A Handbook For the Modern Man" by Michael Flocker.

Find out who is and who isn't a "metrosexual"--and maybe figure out if YOU are one!

Metrosexuals DO This:

Invest lots of money in nice accessories, such as watches, designer sunglasses, and money clips.
Clothes should conform to your body. Get tailored suits.
Your belt and shoes must always match. (Black on black works best.)
A silver, stainless steel watchband is a must-have.

Get it from Amazon.com: "The Metrosexual Guide To Style: A Handbook For the Modern Man"

Metrosexuals DON'T Ever Wear This:
Plaid flannel
Pirate shirts

Pleated pants
Mullets
Sport watches
High school or college class rings

Surprise! It's not money or good looks. What women want most in a man is...

[Kozak]

If you really want to be a metrosexual use one of these and be done with it....


"Correctly designed and carefully made from the finest surgical stainless steel, this emasculator features a double crushing blade which prevents primary or secondary hemorrhage by crushing both the spermatic cord and artery. Removable wing nut simplifies disassembly for thorough cleaning, and also serves as an adjustment for tightening or approximating the blades. 12" long, 1.5 lbs."

[Prime Choice]

Metrosexuals. Sheesh...leave it to the Left to mess up a perfectly natural delineation of the sexes. That's probably why Russia invented manly women. ...or should I say, "metrosexual version 1.0"?

Pardon me, but what in God's good name is wrong with men being manly and girls being girly??

[ACanuckProud2BeNorthAmerican]

Ummm, I'm sorry but this is totally F*CKED! The word metrosexual sounds like a compromise for a guy who can't even admit he's gay! I'm sorry but men should be men. What does that mean? A real man wouldn't give a flying F*CK about how others perceived him. This goes back to the fashion vs. style concept, which will never go away. Fashion is dictated by the media as to what to wear. Style is wearing items based on your personal tastes, and reflects yourself in a unique way to everyone around you. Who would you rather be? Conforming to the latest fashion trends is so spineless and stupid. Case in point...The 80's fashions that have been regurgitated in full force right now. Go into your local mall and you will see trucker hats for sale for $40 or more with trendy logos stamped on them. Yes trucker hats, y'know the plastic mesh and foam high rise hats that you couldn't give away a few years ago. Last year somebody named Ashton Kutcher wears them and they've become the coolest thing ever. So this means trailer trash people are now cool again. The difference is that the trailer trash trucker-hat wearers are truly cool cuz they're expressing their personal style. Everyone else is just emulating the latest Kutcher fashions. WAKE UP People! This is exactly what the big cosmetic corporations want men to believe...that you really need a $40 moisturizer. You DON'T! You're a MAN! Do you really want to look vibrant, soft, and supple? Those are attributes we save for our ladies! And ladies, the more rugged the man, the better you're going to look too. The natural oils produced by a man's face every day are more than enough to keep his skin young. Don't buy into the media machine! PLEASE for the sanity of society and our young men growing up right now looking for direction, don't F*CK them up any more!

[CaptSkip]

OWWWWWW!

Before even reading your discription of the emasculator, my hand quickly grabed my "package" as the image appeared.

Instinct.

[The Red Zone]

$40 moisturizers are a ripoff anyhow. Motor oil does the same thing for pennies.

[Slings and Arrows]

Now I know what Hillary got for Christmas!

[CaptSkip]

DAMN, up late again.

discription=description.

[winner3000]

I agree with you. I thought one of the few advantages that men still have was that men's styles hardly ever change. Apparently cosmetic companies are trying their hardest to start playing with men's head every year. There's nothing wrong with being well groomed; it's actually a good thing. But come on!

I can't believe for example that women are now wearing these ugly and uncomfortable ridiculously pointy high heel shoes. The pointy part on these things (the front part of the shoe) must be about 5 inches on some of them, as if it were a weapon!! You know these styles are specifically designed so that once the style is past, the woman who bought the shoes will not be able to wear them as there's nothing subtle about them. I don't know of any man who thinks they're sexy and yet I see tons of women wearing them so that other women know that they are up to date on the fashion. Do we really want men to go through this hell too?

[SoDak]

You said it brother.

[jazzlite]

You are smart to stay a real man. I tell my husband (who is a real man) that 80% of the men in the world do not agree with the idea that they should be feminine. It goes against their nature in their hearts. However, they are forced through the political correctness of the 20%, most of whom work for the entertainment industry or the media, to hide what nature put there, for surival of course. One day, this fake social structure will "stump it's toe" and the return to normal of this society will make your head spin. The ratio is probably 80/20 real men to wimps who paint their nails. However, the media would have us think that 80% shave their bodies and paint their nail versus 20% who do not. It makes me barf.

[Young Rhino]

Now I know what Hillary got for Christmas!

Did she test it on Janet Reno before trying it on Bill?

[KneelBeforeZod]

well, what about the guns? chrome, nickel, SS, blued, parkerized, what???

[Caipirabob]

This article is justified if only so that I may identify my "inner metrosexual" and then take him outside and pummel him...

[Caipirabob]

What women want most in a man:

Faithful partner: 54 percent

Respect the other person's independence: 40 percent

Ability to listen: 35 percent

Physical attraction: 13 percent

Being good in bed: 6 percent

What men want most in a woman:

**

Faithful partner: 47 percent

Respect the other person's independence: 36 percent

Intelligence: 35 percent

Physical attraction: 26 percent

Being good in bed: 13 percent

This is kind of telling, if it's significant within this sampling: Perhaps close to a half of either group felt that loyalty was important as opposed to "Respecting the other person's independence" which could be taken as the opposite as marraige is not an "independent" operation.

Guess the numbers are fairly consistent with the divorce rate in this nation.

[MeekOneGOP]

I'm letting you handle this one Meek - Metrosexual Awareness ping!

Oh, but you do such a good job posting it ! hehe !

Alright, alright ! I'll post it !:

metrosexual

(met.roh.SEK.shoo.ul) n. An urban male with a strong aesthetic sense who spends a great deal of time and money on his appearance and lifestyle.
—metrosexuality n.

Howard Dean: Metrosexual

Google Search for Metrosexual

Listen

Howard Dean

Howard Dean says he's running for President, and on paper he's quite a candidate. He's the longest-serving Democratic governor. He signed the first law in the country to allow gay unions. And, he's got the endorsement of America's favorite president-that-isn't: Martin Sheen. In real life, most Americans would pass Howard Dean on the street without a second glance. Can a candidate with just about zero national name-recognition actually make a viable run for the nation's highest office? Tonight, Howard Dean, the invisible candidate.

[Slings and Arrows]

Now I know what Hillary got for Christmas!

Did she test it on Janet Reno before trying it on Bill?

She had to - she'd already tested last year's model on Wesley Clark.

[Young Rhino]

She had to - she'd already tested last year's model on Wesley Clark.

LOL - Clark would do anything to win the Dean crowd.

[Cindy]

ARTICLE SNIPPET: "A metrosexual is a straight, urban male who is eager to embrace and even show off his feminine side."


God made MALES and God made FEMALES.
All the rest are people who want to
deliberately deviate from God's plan.
It's that simple.

[CharlotteVRWC]

"Where have all the cowboys gone?"

[Ed_in_NJ]

Sounds like a marketing ploy -- trying to get males to spend vast sums on vanity items.

Also sounds like "multisexual" would be more appropriate.