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Military Survival Rules
Posted on 10/14/2003 9:14:07 PM PDT by SandRat
Thought we all could use a little GI Humor. Enjoy
"Aim towards the enemy." - Instruction printed on U.S. Army rocket launcher
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." - U.S. Army training notice
"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. From 30,000 feet, every single bomb always hits the ground." - U.S. Air Force ammunition memo.
"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal
"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." - Army preventive maintenance publication
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." - Infantry Journal
"Tracers point both ways." - U.S. Army Ordnance Corps memo.
"Five-second fuses only last three seconds." - Infantry Journal
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." - Col. David H. Hackworth
"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an ambush." - Infantry Journal
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay
"Any ship can be a minesweeper - once." - Anonymous
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Army recruit
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." - Your buddies
"If you see a bomb disposal technician running, try to keep up with him." - U.S. Army ordnance manual
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed" - U.S. Air Force flight training manual
TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: gihumor; humor
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1
posted on
10/14/2003 9:14:08 PM PDT
by
SandRat
To: SandRat; snippy_about_it
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Army recruitThe first lesson many in the ervice learn
2
posted on
10/14/2003 9:17:42 PM PDT
by
SAMWolf
(Lost interest? It's so bad I've lost apathy!)
To: All
I would like to take a moment to ask for donations.
It should be clear to all conservatives by now that the left intends to demonize us. They don't just disagree with us, they hate us. And worse, they want to get other people to hate us.
Places like Free Republic drive the left batty.
Please donate. Thanks for your consideration.
3
posted on
10/14/2003 9:19:07 PM PDT
by
Support Free Republic
(Your support keeps Free Republic going strong!)
To: SandRat
Thanks for the laugh. I e-mailed this to my son whose carrier is nearing Iraq.
4
posted on
10/14/2003 9:19:43 PM PDT
by
bjcintennessee
(Don't Sweat the Small Stuff)
To: SandRat; Pukin Dog; hchutch
"An uncaged Sidewinder has no friends."
5
posted on
10/14/2003 9:20:16 PM PDT
by
Poohbah
("Would you mind not shooting at the thermonuclear weapons?" -- Major Vic Deakins, USAF)
To: SandRat
Great post! There are way too many words of wisdom here for me to pick a favorite phrase.
6
posted on
10/14/2003 9:20:46 PM PDT
by
68skylark
To: SandRat
"If you see a bomb disposal technician running, try to keep up with him." - U.S. Army ordnance manual Is this from a manual or a T-shirt?
7
posted on
10/14/2003 9:22:26 PM PDT
by
xm177e2
(Stalinists, Maoists, Ba'athists, Pacifists: Why are they always on the same side?)
To: SandRat
"If you see a bomb disposal technician running, try to keep up with him." - U.S. Army ordnance manual My favorite. heh
Prairie
8
posted on
10/14/2003 9:22:33 PM PDT
by
prairiebreeze
(Brought to you by The American Democratic Party, also known as Al Qaeda, Western Division.)
To: Poohbah
Somebody else who has fought in the valley of death at NTC.
9
posted on
10/14/2003 9:25:18 PM PDT
by
dts32041
(Is it time to practice decimation with our representatives?)
To: SandRat
"And for you guys on ships - bathe. Regularly. Or we'll get out the wire brushes, and you won't like it much."
10
posted on
10/14/2003 9:26:46 PM PDT
by
Chad Fairbanks
(Donate to FR, and I'll record a Theme Song for the next BadJoe Weekend)
To: SandRat
Never pull a slack wire, or cut a taut one...
To: SandRat
LOL bump
12
posted on
10/14/2003 9:29:17 PM PDT
by
GOPJ
To: Poohbah
DArn I just realized you were talking about the missle, used to knock down aircraft.
Oh well you should have seen the sidewinders I saw in the VOD.
13
posted on
10/14/2003 9:29:47 PM PDT
by
dts32041
(Is it time to practice decimation with our representatives?)
To: dts32041
Somebody else who has fought in the valley of death at NTC.No, just someone who's seen more than a couple Boola-Boolas out at PMTC (c8
14
posted on
10/14/2003 9:30:18 PM PDT
by
Poohbah
("Would you mind not shooting at the thermonuclear weapons?" -- Major Vic Deakins, USAF)
To: SandRat
'"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal '
Well unless you're in a new American tank and the enemy is in an old Russian one.
15
posted on
10/14/2003 9:31:59 PM PDT
by
Bogey78O
(No! Don't throw me in the briar patch!!!!!)
To: SandRat
"If it moves salute it, if it doesn't move paint it"--first thing you learn in the Navy.
16
posted on
10/14/2003 9:33:38 PM PDT
by
Hugin
To: SandRat
17
posted on
10/14/2003 9:33:44 PM PDT
by
Lokibob
To: SandRat
In the ROTC lounge at college there was huge bookshelf full of old manuals. I didn't know wether to laugh or worry about my career choice when I found and old manual for the Lance missile, (a short range missile with a tactical nuclear warhead)... it was animated. I'm not talking illustrated. I mean comic book animated! Imagine if you can a smiling nuclear missile telling you how to fire it.
18
posted on
10/14/2003 9:45:02 PM PDT
by
azcap
To: SandRat
A hearty belly-laugh from an old Army retiree :-)
To: CholeraJoe
Ping.
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