Not Sure If You Married Your Brother? 9 Signs To Look For

Babylon Bee ^ | 10-22-26 | Babylon Bee

[dynachrome]

With Representative Ilhan Omar seemingly unsure about whether she accidentally married her brother, millions of women have been left asking themselves a difficult question: Am I married to my brother? Don't worry. We'll help you sort this out.

Here are nine signs to look for you might be married to your brother:

You have the same parents: This probably should have tipped you off.

You grew up in the same house together and he always calls you sister: At least you had a healthy relationship — at the time.

He gave you a noogie after "kissing the bride": Evidence of a clear sibling rivalry.

Nobody knew which side to sit on at your wedding: Talk about awkward.

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TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: ilhanomar; satire; thebee

[dynachrome]

The family tree doesn't have many branches.

[BenLurkin]

bttt

[Opinionated Blowhard]

Who knew that Omar was a redneck? Get yerself a gun and a pickup truck, Ilhan!

[I-ambush]

Maybe she should move to West Virginia to run for congress. (Apologies to any West Virginians on the forum).

[I-ambush]

Maybe she should move to West Virginia to run for congress. (Apologies to any West Virginians on the forum).

[Bon of Babble]

Can’t wait until the damning DNA evidence is made public (as it should be).

Omar will still claim “not to my knowledge” - and her base, Democrat supporters and media will believe her.

[Tell It Right]

10. Your husband might be your brother if your father asked others, "How do I pay myself a dowry?".

11. If your husband shows you a keepsake of yours he's had since he fell in love with you, and it's one of your baby teeth.

12. If you've told your husband, "I'm glad it got bigger than it was when we bathed together as kids."

13. If your husband told you, "I wish Night Ranger would record a song Sister Muslim".

[null and void]

I'm not seeing the problem. Don't Mormons have sister wives?

nully ducking and running for cover...

[T.B. Yoits]

[BikerJoe]

“If a husband and wife get divorced in West Virginia, are they still brother and sister?”

[HonorInPa]

The toothbrush was obviously invented in West Virginia. Anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

[Afterguard]

“Get yerself a gun and a pickup truck, Ilhan!”

(If that’s your real name...)

[NonValueAdded]

“If a husband and wife get divorced in West Virginia, are they still brother and sister?”

"If we get a divorce, can I still call you mom?"

[bert]

Now, many many years ago
When I was twenty three
I was married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be
This widow had a grown-up daughter
Had hair of red
My father fell in love with her
And soon the two were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life
My daughter was my mother
‘Cause she was my father’s wife
To complicate the matters
Even though it brought me joy
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad
And so became my uncle
Though it made me very sad
For if he was my uncle
That also made him the brother
Of the widow’s grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-mother
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
My father’s wife then had a son
That kept them on the run
And he became my grandchild
For he was my daughter’s son
My wife is now my mother’s mother
And it makes me blue
Because, she is my wife
She’s my grandmother too
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
Now, if my wife is my grandmother
Then, I am her grandchild
And every time I think of it
It nearly drives me wild
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw
As husband of my grandmother
I am my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa