Millions Gather To Express Total Ignorance About Political System

BabylonBee.com ^ | 3:30 PM · Oct 18, 2025 | The Babylon Bee

[E. Pluribus Unum]

U.S. — Millions of Americans took to the streets today in order to express to the world their total and absolute ignorance about the political system they live in.

Several major cities including Boston, New York City and Chicago saw over one hundred thousand residents show up to proclaim their abject incomprehension of governance.

"The world needs to understand how incredibly little we know," said local man Roger McMahon, who had joined the march. "I really do not think the greater population appreciates how completely uneducated and illiterate we are when it comes to our own political system. That's why I'm here marching. We're going to join our voices together and let the message ring loud and clear that we are uneducated rubes in desperate need of a middle-school social studies class."

Rallygoers marched throughout the day on Saturday, chanting various slogans such as "Where do I live?" and "How does government work?"

"It's incredibly inspiring, seeing so many people walking arm in arm saying 'Hey, I don't know anything,'" said local woman Barbara Samson. "It feels incredible to be part of this movement of telling people that I'm a real dullard."

At publishing time, the rest of the world had politely told the rallygoers that the message had been received.

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TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:

[Kudsman]

I saw many signs, homemade by the left, fearing for ‘our’ democracy. Clear useful idiots or leftist agitators.

[Governor Dinwiddie]

Millions Dozens of aging White liberal Americans took to the streets today.

[goodnesswins]

Brainless slavemasters is my new term for them.

[logi_cal869]

Submissives of the ‘true pandemic.’

[GreyFriar]

Why aren’t they saying “No Tsars”? I guess they are off roaming.

[antidemoncrat]

“Millions of Americans took to the streets today in order to express to the world their total and absolute ignorance about the political system they live in”

Fools and their freedom mare parting.

[sjmjax]

Very possibly the most succinct description of today’s protests that you will see or hear.

It’s a strange world we live in when a website that is supposed to be humor and satire has more concise and accurate reporting than any news organization.

[RetiredTexasVet]

So True.

[Kudsman]

Mail incoming.

I want a lkke button for Christmas.

[Navy Patriot]

The Bee is The Best!

[sjmjax]

That’s on my wish list as well.

Many times I would like to acknowledge someone’s contribution without simply tacking on another post that would often be long disconnected from the original comment.

The ability to edit your own post is also seriously lacking.

I really enjoy this board but its structure is truly archaic.

[Kudsman]

Maybe Big Balls Corestein will buy it one day. ;)

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

We're going to join our voices together and let the message ring loud and clear that we are uneducated rubes in desperate need of a middle-school social studies class.

I have often asked people, sometimes politely, how the heck they passed Civics and US Government which are required subjects.

It is not like Econ or Chemistry which are optional. No, they are like English and Algebra. They are required.

You have no excuse for not knowing how the system works.

[Big Red Badger]

FReeper beaters Abound!

[SpaceBar]

Truth... from a satire site.

[Verginius Rufus]

Are they going to demand that all those streets named for MLK be renamed?

[anton]

https://www.cincinnati.com/gcdn/authoring/authoring-images/2025/10/18/PCIN/86773166007-101825-no-kings-34.JPG?width=1320&height=882&fit=crop&format=pjpg&auto=webp

Dozens gathered in Cincinnati. Still the most white persons ever attending an event in Smale Park. Maybe hundreds.

[Retain Mike]

I can sympathize with their anxiety and bewilderment. It is mentally stressful to read the Declaration of Independence, Constitution, and Bill of Rights. Reading the Federalist Papers, James Madison’s notes to the Constitutional Convention, and Leonard W. Levy’s Origins of the Bill of Rights would be sure to send untold thousands to urgent care facilities. I have probably shortened my life by a decade by repeatedly indulging in these activities.

[Retain Mike]

That could be the next cancel culture initiative because Dr. Martin Luther King saw preeminence of personal liberties as key to personal sovereignty by saying, "When the architects of our Republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men- yes black men as well as white men-would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness…..So we’ve come to cash this check; a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice…..Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksand’s of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood.”

“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up, live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.’ I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character…..little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.”

“This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with new meaning. ‘My country, ‘tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring.’”