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Posted on 08/08/2025 3:24:01 PM PDT by Jonty30
Several weeks ago, I had a serious health scare. The emergency appointment and ultrasound were attended alone. I did a ring-around of my friends and sisters, but they were away or otherwise occupied. All I wanted was someone to hold my hand and give me a bit of moral support, but on a sweltering hot day, I sat alone in the hospital waiting room – a solitary figure among a sea of cosy couples, with only my Kindle for company as I bounced off the walls with anxiety. While the scare turned out to be just that, the stark realisation that my friends weren’t really there for me when it counted, and that I was utterly alone, was an unpleasant wake-up call. As a childless, unmarried woman of 63, it is difficult to admit how terrified I am of ending up alone and being eaten by cats. Read Next: I tried eight types of coffee bean – a supermarket brand was the clear winner Without the silent contract between parent and child, Someone we look after and who can take care of us, the loneliness wears more and more heavily on me. I find it devastating to imagine ending my days isolated or worse, going gaga and incontinent in a care home. Like many women, I had always expected to get married, have children and maybe even a house in the countryside. It never happened, but not by design – I left it too late. Looking back, in my twenties and thirties, I was about as ready for the chains of matrimony as I was for joining the Women’s Institute. I didn’t want my life mapped out for me.
(Excerpt) Read more at msn.com ...
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Click here: to donate by Credit Card Or here: to donate by PayPal Or by mail to: Free Republic, LLC - PO Box 9771 - Fresno, CA 93794 Thank you very much and God bless you. |
I’m in Northern Michigan spending the next week (starting tomorrow) golfing, fishing, poker playing, etc with seven guys I grew up and graduated H.S. with 45 years ago As I tell my wife - no b.s. passes through us - we know each other to well!
A yearly event to compare golf handicaps and grey hairs...
Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt, toots.
But the bicycles don’t need the fish.
Tead later
She could always rent a companion from Visiting Angels or a similar agency. I guess the medical facility would not allow her to bring her cats?
“The answer is that “You left them in your twenties when you had options.””
Another answer is “You didn’t see them. They were invisible to you.”
She is a dumbass.
Yes, we fans are getting nervous and think about the players. There’s no chance for the Braves to make it this year but I’m going to stick by them. It’s been interesting is all I can say.
With the mobility of today's society, many people who have kids and raised them responsibly find themselves alone after the kids marry someone from a different state whom they met in college, or have a job transfer across the country, or travel for work, etc. So there are a lot of needs such older people have, especially widowed or divorced seniors, for friends who can be counted upon in challenging situations.
Such friendships are often hard to find and require work to maintain. Reliability in friendships for help when you need it also requires you to give help when it's needed, and some people forget that part. Their friendship account becomes “overdrawn”, and a sudden spat can end things unless there is also a strong development of communications and values. The woman in this self-pitying essay says she goes weeks without talking to anyone, and almost boasts about not being a team player or joiner. As a wise man once said, “You can have whatever you want in life, if you are willing to pay the price.”
Fortunate folks find and participate willingly a healthy church community, hopefully large enough to have a “care team” and an ethos of letting the office know if you need a ride to a medical appointment or are in recovery from surgery and could use some frozen meals, etc.
The church I've been part of in recent years has subcommittees for shut-in care, new mother care, respite care for caregivers of disabled relatives, emergency meal delivery and various other needs, in a congregation of roughly 200.
Do a few people shoulder most of the caring? Surprisingly, the elders do a great job of recruiting new members onto all kinds of ministries right from the start, including weeding an assigned “zone” on the property, trimming hedges, laundering table or altar cloths, kitchen help, etc., in ADDITION to numerous evangelical activities. From teenage onward, almost everyone has some role to play. I hope heaven is this well organized.
It is a give and take situation as is everything
Your statement is so true, I live in a 55+ community, there are 3 ladies in condos here in their mid and late 80’s, husbands have passed away and kids are NO WHERE around, a group of us here help them with shopping, Dr. appointments, meals, holiday meals ect.!!! These ladies made the right choices YET their kids, grandkids ect. are just to busy with their own lives to give a damn!! VERY SAD!!
As they say, if you want to make God laugh, make plans.
How perfectly terrible. I am so sorry, but don't take it personally—it's the new, unchurched generations. Wait until Jesus shows it to them on the Big Screen when the time comes.
“””How perfectly terrible. I am so sorry, but don’t take it personally—it’s the new, unchurched generations.”””
We got a chuckle out of it. We are used to it as we live in Occupied Territory of Minneapolistan.
When my generation came of age, there was a draft for Vietnam for many years. Even those with college deferments could get drafted when they graduated. Many of the best men went there, and of those who came back, many had emotional or substance abuse issues. There are no quick judgments that fit all situations.
Most married conservatives are, sadly. They think it was all their own righteousness instead of God's gracious provision for them.
I agree. Sadly, my bestie from high school died 35 years ago and my bestie from college died 17 years ago. Friends I've made since then can never understand you like the ones who knew your beginnings, how you've grown, and what happened to make you weaker, stronger or better.
Wise words!
Well, said. Thank you.
Never trust a pastor or a therapist with a toupée.
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