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Joe Biden States He Absolutely Would Have Approved All The Presidential Pardons If He Had Known About Them
The Bee ^ | July 16, 2025 | Staff

Posted on 07/16/2025 12:15:20 PM PDT by Navy Patriot

GREENVILLE, DE — In a rare public appearance after leaving office in January, former President Joe Biden stated that he absolutely would have approved all of his presidential pardons if he had known about them.

In brief comments to reporters outside his Delaware home, Biden addressed persistent rumors that he knew nothing about the pardons he issued in the closing days and hours of his presidency, reiterating that he would have approved them if anyone had asked him.

"Let me be clear, I was on board with all of these pardons I issued, even the ones I found out about later," Biden said. "There's a lot of malarkey going around about me not really being the one calling the shots, but that's… but that's… that's… nobody knows. There's not a single pardon with my signature that I don't agree with, even the ones that other people signed. If I didn't approve of them, then… then… barvinzabiment."

Controversy has grown over the last several months about the legitimacy of many of the pardons that bore Biden's signature, something with which the former president takes great exception. "Listen up, folks, I was the president," he continued. "The idea… that the folks who were making the decisions for me were the ones making the decisions, it's just… it's just not… it's just… c'mon, man."

At publishing time, news had broken that previously undiscovered pardons had been found preemptively clearing all members of Biden's White House staff and his autopen of any potential wrongdoing.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Education; History
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; satire

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Pardons for Me but not for Thee!
1 posted on 07/16/2025 12:15:20 PM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: Navy Patriot

The Great and Terrible Oz Has Spoken!


2 posted on 07/16/2025 12:16:25 PM PDT by Mr. Jeeves ([CTRL]-[GALT]-[DELETE])
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To: Navy Patriot

The title of this Bee article is literally true. It is not a parody.


3 posted on 07/16/2025 12:28:50 PM PDT by jroehl (And how we burned in the camps later - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn - The Gulag Archipelago)
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To: jroehl
The title of this Bee article is literally true. It is not a parody.

That is why I posted this Bee "article".

4 posted on 07/16/2025 12:31:35 PM PDT by Navy Patriot (President Trump Decisively Won Popular & E.C., Celebrate Recivilization!)
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To: Navy Patriot

I knew it was the Bee after one second.

Getting better at it.


5 posted on 07/16/2025 12:33:01 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Democrats are the Party of racism, anger, hate and violence.)
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To: Navy Patriot

Many a true word spoken in jest.


6 posted on 07/16/2025 12:57:27 PM PDT by spokeshave (Proud Boys, Angry Dads. Grumpy Grandads & Curmudgeons)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum
I knew it was the Bee after one second.

Getting better at it.

Drat!

7 posted on 07/16/2025 1:33:50 PM PDT by Navy Patriot (President Trump Decisively Won Popular & E.C., Celebrate Recivilization!)
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To: Navy Patriot

The Bee nails reality again.


8 posted on 07/16/2025 2:08:18 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon." Amen. Come, Lord Jesus….)
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To: Navy Patriot

Yeah, my aunt would’ve been my uncle if she had balls and a penis.


9 posted on 07/16/2025 2:50:01 PM PDT by drypowder
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To: Navy Patriot

So what, you can’t retroactively approve a legal action that required a legal action at the prior time.


10 posted on 07/16/2025 3:17:53 PM PDT by Mlheureux
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