Posted on 12/01/2024 9:49:51 AM PST by TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig
Well, good luck.
Nonsense; this isn’t ‘grief counseling’. People express their feelings and ask advice about all sorts of things on this forum.
My brother can be very annoying, but I tolerate him because I am the only one in my family who will.
He try’s to manipulate everyone for money, because he spends all his money as soon as he gets it. He can’t manipulate me, because I have less that he does.
He has convinced himself that God has annointed him as an Apostle. I just keep my mouth shut.
He tried to help a friend of his, a very good mechanic, after his shop failed. He was convinced that his mission from God was to help him out. My brother would not see that the guy was using him, and had a drugs and gambling problem. He gave this guy all his money for various fictional projects, to the point that he and his son and daughter were essentially evicted from the rental house I had
arranged for him.
Some Apostle, right? Won’t even see that his first job is to support his family.
Thank you for giving me someplace to vent.
We are called to love and forgive, even when it is hard to do so!
Lord have Mercy!
Mr mm and I have separate bookshelves.
His are in his office and mine are in our sun room off the main living space.
Good post—that is one reason why it is critical for people with money to keep quiet about that with relatives.
Even if you have nice things you always want to complain you went into debt to get them (even if you really paid cash).
You always want to be the poorest of the relatives—even when you are not.
:-)
My philosophy about being a guest is since I’m not having to do the cooking, I eat what’s prepared and thank the host/hostess.
I clear my place and offer to help with the dishes and it that’s turned down, I go relax out of the way with a clear conscience.
I keep my savior complex limited to adopting the elderly lady I work with as my work wife.
I tell her how great she is and rebuilt her greenhouse (total build actually)
She really is a blessing.
The first thing is to stop making accommodations for him. They crave control. I find it makes them less likely to show up. I don’t watch TV so when people want to do that, I make myself scarce.
Conservatives are human too, and sometimes need support and encouragement from others.
If you think you don’t, you have far more relationship issues than you realize.
Some times one has to put up with difficult humans to connect with the others.
I didn’t hear anything egregious. Just you being pissed off over petty things.
Hei is a jerk. The rest of the family sounds great.
Stop the drama and grow up. Not in the ways the others here are telling you. But instead to learn to detach and disconnect from getting emotionally wrought up over the petty. Show your sister and the children what class and a wry sense of humor look likr.
They can ask me for money all day but they won’t get it. “No” is a complete sentence.
The only reason we’re going to be rearranging things is because my daughter FINALLY closed on her own house and has stuff we’ve been storing here for that day.
And now she’ll be getting it, which will clear out some of our mess. Then we’ll be free to rearrange things again.
Since we had our home built from some sketches I made and moved into it in August 2022, I have given my wofe free reign to decorate it however she wants....except for one tiny bedroom that is my photography den
I did have to call her out for her sconce addiction by telling hwr it was starting to look like the set of Dark Shadows in here.
The 15 totes I just moved from the shed to the porch that are all xmas decorations....she actually said “I have to get rid of some stuff”
People can and should forgive, but that doesn’t mean they are required to continue setting themselves up for abuse. It seems to me that would just be enabling lousy behavior.
I think it is helpful to see what other families are experiencing, to give me some perspective about my own family. We made it through the holidays with one minor spat. Apologies were made the next day.
It is hard for me to fathom how some people can elevate their own preferences, the imposition of their will, over love for their family members, and appreciation for the gift of time with them. The difficult relatives who do that are in need of prayer, big time. And so are the people who endeavor to put up with them.
The jerk is going to steamroll him—over and over and over again....
They never stop—until you stop them.
I read what you wrote, didn’t take it personally, and ran it thru the “this has been going on for 12 yrs filter” and decided your advice was not the correct answer.
I never mentioned the time he almost drowned me and my son due to his selfish behavior.
The list goes on and on.
Sometimes less is more.
(SimCity reference there).
As she takes stuff, I’m going to be consolidating other things, too, like Christmas Decorations and my Easter Egg stuff (Ukrainian Easter Egg making supplies)
I’m starting a donate pile in the garage and when it’s big enough, it’s going.
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