Posted on 04/21/2024 6:46:48 PM PDT by DoodleBob
Ah, the office – a place where language goes to get dressed in a suit and tie, only to trip over its own shoelaces. Here are 21 phrases that we’ve all heard ad nauseam, and if we’re being honest, wouldn’t miss if they were banished from the corporate lexicon forever:
#1. “Touch Base”
Because nothing says “I don’t actually play baseball” like using a sports metaphor to schedule a meeting.
#2. “Reach Out”
What are we, in a 90s boy band? Just say “I’ll send you an email” and leave the emotional ballads out of it.
#3. “Circle Back”
Less reminiscent of a productive workplace strategy, more an endless loop of doom where nothing ever gets resolved.
#4. “Synergize”
The verbal equivalent of a corporate trust fall. It’s supposed to mean teamwork but sounds more like a new age retreat.
#5. “Think Outside the Box”
If we had a nickel for every time this was said, we could construct a very large, very square box to trap the phrase in forever.
#6. “Leverage”
Originally a physics term, now just a fancy way of saying “use.” Because why use simple words when you can sound like a Wall Street tycoon?
#7. “Paradigm Shift”
Nothing quite like invoking the cosmos to describe changing the office printer.
#8. “Deep Dive”
Not a thrilling ocean adventure, but an overly long meeting about statistics. Bring a snorkel.
#9. “Bandwidth”
Unless you work at NASA, you’re probably just talking about time. Spoiler: nobody’s downloading you.
#10. “Low-Hanging Fruit”
Great for describing apples, less so for the easily achievable tasks that somehow still aren’t done.
#11. “Move the Needle”
Unless we’re all suddenly DJs, can we agree to just say “make progress”?
#12. “Boil the Ocean”
An epic quest to accomplish the impossible, or just corporate speak for trying to do way too much? You decide.
#13. “Take it Offline”
Because apparently, talking in person is now akin to being in airplane mode.
#14. “Win-Win Situation”
A mythical scenario, much like a unicorn, where everyone is happy and nobody’s spreadsheet gets rejected.
15. “On My Radar”
Unless you’re air traffic control, let’s stick to “I’m aware of it.”
#16. “Ping Me”
Not a game of table tennis, just a request for a message. Sadly, paddles are not involved.
#17. “Drill Down”
A phrase that makes you feel like you’re in for some serious dental work, rather than a closer look at the details.
#18. “Game Changer”
Overused to the point of meaninglessness. Changing the game or just changing the PowerPoint template?
#19. “At the End of the Day”
Spoiler: It’s night. Also, a filler phrase that’s the verbal equivalent of shrugging.
#20. “It’s on My Plate”
Because “I’m working on it” wasn’t foodie enough.
#21. “Ecosystem”
Unless we’re discussing the rainforest, can we agree our office plant doesn’t constitute an ecosystem?
So, next time you catch yourself using one of these phrases, take a moment to laugh, then say what you mean. After all, clear communication is the key to success, not the ability to speak in buzzwords.
These do get annoying.
bttt.
The feel good word “issue” is like fingernails on a chalkboard.
How about the following:
Diverse
Equitable
Fair
Non profit
Charitable
I could go on and on but I’m already over it…..
What?? “Lean into” is not on the list?
I’ve been retired six years and ALL of those are annoying as hell. But “Lean into” is my all-time raise-the-hair-on-my-neck phrase. Yuck.
“Take it offline” reminds me of “Get a room, you two.”
At the end of the day, the bottom line is…it is what it is. 🤣
“It is what it is.”
I’m kind of ok with people using “circle back,” It lets me know who the left-wingers are without baiting them into an argument. It’s sort of like Coexist bumper stickers, or women with hyphenated sir-names, it’s a dead giveaway.
As in, "I have an ask"
Wife picked this up as a nurse manager. Drives me crazy.
Don’t forget “inclusive.”
Likewise every time someone attaches the word “crack” to any recipe. Crack chicken, Crack dessert bars, Crack 7-layer dip, etc.
Peach
Silos.
With all the Indians Mike Lee has brought in get ready for
“Do the needful”
“I am wanting”
I worked in several offices during the early 1990s.
I have never heard #12: Boil The Ocean, or
#20: Its On My Plate.
I’m wondering if the writer made “Boil The Ocean” up himself.
I’ve been seeing “cohort” a lot lately. Already tired of it.
ROFL!
Although I’d be lyin’ if I claimed I NEVER use ANY of these. 😉
I thought #16 “ping me” was traced back to “pinging” a submarine or other vessel via sonar.
downstream
socialize
I will say I'm hearing less of the buzzword talk in the office.
Gawd, every time I hear that I thing of Raggedy Jen the Skankenstein.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.