Posted on 05/12/2023 4:12:40 PM PDT by george76
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Amid startling allegations of a bribery scheme that involved foreign nationals giving the Biden family millions of dollars in exchange for policy changes, the President spoke to journalists this morning on the White House lawn. During his talk, he offered them money in exchange for not talking about the bribery.
"Listen newspaper people, just drop the story, ok? Please? I'll give you five dollars," said the President, fumbling around in his pocket. "This is a nothingburger! I'll give this crisp new five-dollar bill to whoever agrees to stop talking about my highly lucrative bribery operation! Ooh! And I have some gum here, too! Who wants a delicious stick of gum? Come on, man!"
Sources say Biden pocketed $10 million during his time as Vice President from foreign interests in exchange for special policy considerations. The sources then stopped talking after Biden bribed them.
I wouldn’t be surprised if Brandon was paying the press not to report on that!
I know this is the Babylon Bee, but is it really satire or just actual news?
some atty named cohen is writing the checks
Journalists have been on the take for a very long time
I have a feeling that the Bee is probably going to be raided and then hauled in front of the ministry of truth because of this. I’m only half-kidding.
Agree. Otherwise, why haven’t we seen ANYTHING about the Biden’s legal troubles?
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