[Thank You Rush]

Why did the good Lord make the Irish drunks?

So they wouldn’t take over the world.

[Thank You Rush]

Didn’t leave the house today - but I did wear my shamrock earrings. I’ve waited all day to tell that joke. Irish ancestry here and believe it or not - NOT A DROP TO DRINK!

[Responsibility2nd]

O’Leary was walking home with a sheep under each arm.

Murphy asked; “Hey O’Leary. Are you going to shear those sheep?

O’Leary replied; “I’m not. They are both for me!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What do you call an Irishman with 30 girlfriends?

A sheep farmer.

[ArtDodger]

How does an Irish girl celebrate feminism?
Erin go braless!

[_longranger81]

Erin told Dermot, “Today’s our first anniversary, and I wan to make you something special for dinner—those Escargot snails your French aunt used to make you that you love so much. Now pick up a bucket of them right after work, and head STRAIGHT home—no stopping’ off at the pub with Michael, you hear?”
“I’ll do it”, says Dermot. “I’ll be straight home with the snails, no stopping off.”
Dermot gets out of work and picks up a bucket of the best snails at the snail store, when Michael sees him and hails him down.
“Say, isn’t it your first anniversary, Dermot? You must let me buy you a pint to celebrate the happy day!”
“No, Michael, I’ve got to get straight home with the snails for supper; another night, maybe?”
“Dermot, you’d insult your oldest friend in the world by not letting’ him buy you a drink on your special day?”
Needless to say, 9:30 finds Dermot stumbling around the last corner toward his house, with the bucket of snails; doesn’t his heel get caught on the curbstone, and doesn’t he tumble head over heels into the walkway, snails flying all over the lawn? As he looks up to see his beloved Erin outlined in the doorway, hands on hips, he looks around him and shouts at the snails, “Come on, boys; we’re almost there! Don’t give up on me now!!”

[CtBigPat]

Da Vinci's Notebook - Another Irish Drinking Song

[stylin19a]

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a train.
His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp.

"What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender."

"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy."

"That little $hit, O'Conner," says Sean, "He couldn't do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself, didn't you have something in your hand?"

"That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner's left breast, and a ting of beauty it was, but utterly useless in a fight."

[drSteve78]

May God bless those that love us, and for those who don’t love us, may God turn their ankles so that we may know them by their limping.

[eldoradude]

[Allegra]

An Irishman leaves a bar…

Hey, don’t laugh! It could happen!

[Angelino97]

What's an Irish seven course meal?

A six-pack and a potato.

=========

An American tourist visits Belfast. He gets to talking to an Irishman in a pub.

After a while, the Irishman asks, "So are you a Catholic or a Protestant?"

The American answers, "I'm an atheist."

The Irishman considers it. Then he asks, "So are you a Catholic atheist or a Protestant atheist?"

[grey_whiskers]

Encircling - Iona

St. Patrick's Breastplate set to Celtic Progressive rock. Absolutely blistering guitar solo.