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To Protest Contributors To Climate Change, Leonardo DiCaprio Glues Self To Self
Babylon Bee ^ | 10/21/22

Posted on 10/21/2022 7:00:58 PM PDT by Impala64ssa

LOS ANGELES, CA — Climate advocates around the world are gluing themselves to various things to protest oil companies and other contributors to climate change. The latest celebrity to join the craze is Leonardo DiCaprio, who is making a powerful statement by gluing his own hand to his face.

"When I really thought about it, I realized one of the greatest contributors to global climate change was myself," said DiCaprio from his 1500-foot coal-powered flying yacht. "That's why I am taking a stand against myself and demanding that I decrease my utterly obscene carbon footprint! Shame on me!"

DiCaprio then applied a generous amount of permanent epoxy to his right hand and slapped himself in the face.

"I will not remove this hand until I have met my demands for climate justice," he said indignantly.

Americans largely supported the heroic gesture by DiCaprio, and are encouraging as many Hollywood stars as possible to glue their hands to their faces as well — preferably over their mouths.

At publishing time, DiCaprio had announced he would also be protesting human trafficking by gluing his other hand to his 16-year-old girlfriend.


TOPICS: Humor; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: celebrityaholes; climatechangehoax; leodicaprio; satire
DiCrapio responded to critics who called him out for out spending so much time on his Diesel guzzling yatch. His lameassed excuse, it's really not his boat, he leases it from an Arab sheikh buddy of his. You'd think an overpaid mannequin like him could come up with better 🐂💩
1 posted on 10/21/2022 7:00:58 PM PDT by Impala64ssa
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To: Impala64ssa

They should have done this but included Mark Hamill.


2 posted on 10/21/2022 7:10:18 PM PDT by Reddy (BO stinks)
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To: Impala64ssa
Americans largely supported the heroic gesture by DiCaprio, and are encouraging as many Hollywood stars as possible to glue their hands to their faces as well — preferably over their mouths.

Sounds completely reasonable. No satire implied.

3 posted on 10/21/2022 7:10:54 PM PDT by ConservativeInPA ( Scratch a leftist and you'll find a fascist )
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To: Impala64ssa

Taylor Swift plans to glue her hand to her butt


4 posted on 10/21/2022 7:18:41 PM PDT by NWFree (Somebody has to say it 🤪)
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To: Impala64ssa

There is something to be said for such empty suits to show the world they care by super gluing their butt cheeks together.


5 posted on 10/21/2022 7:25:59 PM PDT by yefragetuwrabrumuy ("All he had was a handgun. Why did you think that was a threat?" --Rittenhouse Prosecutor)
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To: Impala64ssa
Taking a firm stand for chastity, Miley Cyrus glues her hand to her crotch...


6 posted on 10/21/2022 7:30:09 PM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom (The “I” in Democrat stands for “Integrity.”)
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To: Impala64ssa

I won’t be impressed with DeCrapio’s commitment to the environment until he glues himself to a 24 year old girl.


7 posted on 10/21/2022 8:00:36 PM PDT by DeplorablePaul ("..)
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To: Impala64ssa

Dont give him ideas


8 posted on 10/22/2022 12:01:10 AM PDT by Tennessee Nana
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To: Impala64ssa

I would have said “glued himself to a 300 foot long mega yacht in the Mediterranean.


9 posted on 10/22/2022 7:45:23 AM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes.)
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