You can chime in with your experience.
Conservative or Liberal?
Never told her husband to be that she owed $80,000 in student loan debt. I was furious with her. In addition she didn’t tell him about some plastic surgery she had had and that a few year before they got married she was 100 pounds heavier than she was when they met. They are still married going on I think 15 years but it was a lot of things to keep from somebody and I’ll never forget it.
Not a word on religion nor religious upbringing of children. There are often conflicts after children because they didn’t discuss or agree on these before marriage.
Many find they suddenly care a whole lot about the issue after children come when they didn’t even think about it before.
Politics was not included?
I bet it’s one of the leading causes of divroce.
Interesting that the person’s credit score takes precedence over whether or not they want children.
Is your to-be mother-in-law fat?
I suspect a number of couples, if confronting questions such as noted above, would find that they shouldn’t get married and have children together.
I know it’s not romantic to discuss such issues when you want to get married. But clearly there are many land mines in merging your life with someone else’s.
1- Similar Values
2- True Friendship
3- Mutual Trust and Respect --- Those form the FOUNDATION
Without that Foundation the relationship can't survive the aspects that change over time, such as;
Understanding how to effectively communicate with your spouse,
Your sexual appetite,
Your other life interests.
Idiotic questions.
They ought to be discouraging men getting married. A one sided contract where in almost all cases the financial burden is all on you. She can have you gone with no evidence and one phone call for made up reasons.
There is zero upside for a man to sign a marriage contract. Doesn’t stop infidelity. Til death do you part? Please. We’re at 50% divorce rate for 1st marriages, 66% for second marriages, and 75% for third marriages. Factor in 80% of divorces are filed by women. Now divorces can be filed for any reason, not actual valid fault reasons. No upside for men.
Don’t do it guys. Vagina isn’t worth it. Ask a few guys who have been married and divorced for an honest opinion.
1. What is your credit score? Very good
2. Children- sure but not too many
3. Household chores- I kept a clean house as a single dude
4. Sex- at least once a day
5. Health- i work out every single day
Religion should be number 1. Everything else probably follows that path.
My credit score stunk at the time. She married me anyway.
The rest was based on both of us being rooted in traditional Catholicism (e.g. God determines how many children we have, husband is primary provider/wife is primary home-maker)
I agree. But many of these things change as you get older. Sex, Health and even children can change depending on your age.
after 16 years of child support always late(but I paid it off in full on my very last payment date!!) I was just shocked to learn 3 1/2 years later my credit score was close to 800!! I honestly couldnt believe it... so... I just may be eligible for a young hot babe!! though i’m sure we’d clash a bit on the chores issue... I’m still a little old fashion that way!!
Faith? Will the kids be raised by the wife, by both, or by daycare? Is each spouse capable of gratitude? Can each one apologize if they are wrong? Is your spouse trying to keep learning and maturing — are they going to be a finer person 30 years from now than they are today? Are they trustworthy and self-sacrificing?
I read an article about a divorce mediator years ago who observed that marriages fail because one or both are being selfish. I think there is much truth to this.
We asked these type of questions before we got married. We are both Christians and both Conservative politically. We worked out everything. Been married 22 years.
Household chores are done by the person who is annoyed most by them not being done. Agreement means nothing. The standard of clean, or picked up is different. Do dishes need to be done before you go to bed? Do they need to be done before you leave the dining room and retire to the living room? My wife would say yes to both. I could not figure it out. After thirty years I have agreed to put my dishes in the dishwasher instead of the counter. She has agreed to wash everything and make the kitchen clean. I normally do a search around the house for used dishes while she is doing the dishes. She does this, because a messy kitchen drives her nuts.
In turn, whenever I walk into a room, I shut every drawer and close every cabinet and door. I can’t figure why someone who needs her bed made every day and every dish cleaned as soon as its used, has a problem shutting cabinets and drawers. But that’s marriage. We do the chores that annoy us most.
My wife and I are happy with our arrangement.
Prenuptial
Well Health can change very quickly, one day healthy and the next not so much.
The most important question is: If we divorce, how much are you going to ask me for?