LADIES - Learn The RULES!!!!!!

Unknown | Random E-Mail | Feb. 13, 2022 | Vanity

[PROCON]

(This thread used to appear periodically over the years and here it is again, original thread posted in comments)

OK LADIES - LEARN THE RULES!!!!!!

The Rules developed by National Fairness to Men Organization. This time like the "United States Constitution" these rules are developed by Men. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules for all women to live by! Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

Rules for Women to Live By

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us bitching about you leaving it down.

1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be!

1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair and by then you're stuck with her.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do! Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. ALL men see only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

[anton]

Oooh, I think my 406 had 6 high/low and crawler. 18 total. 3 or 4 usable.

[atc23]

If men don’t like the way their wives cook, they can do it themselves if they think they can do a better job.

I think that’s a given already. Another contributing factor for low marriage and declining birth rates in civilized countries.

Men asking women - “what are you bringing to the table?” isn’t just about dinner.

[WhattheDickens?]

I’ve never seen a man shamed for being single. Maybe you’re reading too many feminist articles.

As a single woman for close to a decade, I’ve noticed that single men are invited to more social events, are invited to married couples homes for dinner, and are “adopted,” by several married couples who take care of them.

In fact I don’t know a single single man that does not have two or three couples regularly inviting him over. I have never seen a single woman regularly invited to any couples’s house for dinner or parties. You poor things get taken care of, because that tends to be what women do.

I enjoy the humor here on free republic. But treating men’s needs as biological and women’s needs as a figment of women’s imagination is comically self righteous.

As a matter of biology, however, particularly after a woman bears children but very often long before, the few seconds to lower the seat often results in her not can’t make it in time. Courtesy, such a lost art.

[Allegra]

:-)

[Trillian]

[Secret Agent Man]

Its not merely regular mainstream articles, its the entire gynocentric culture.

Being single is selfish if you’re a guy. Thats the message thats out there. Or that you’re immature if you don’t want to get married. Or its somehow unfair and wrong if you do not want to get involved with single moms and be responsible for kids that aren’t yours, you just have to step up. Or then they throw out the insults like you must be gay, you must be bitter, you must be ugly and can’t get a woman anyways.

Singleness is empowering and celebrated for wimmin. Not so for guys. Just do any casual reading on it and that’s the general themes you’ll find.

[Varsity Flight]

Amen. 💟✔

[Varsity Flight]

✔

[avenir]

That’s cool.

[gnarledmaw]

Im going to have to at least partially agree. A couple of these, both rule 1 and rule 1, are poser faggoty boy trying a bit too hard to look manly for his boyfriends kind of things.

Its really unfortunate that the guys who do that didnt have any actual men as role models because it eventually effects us all.

I can hear the flip flops on the guy who wrote this all the way over here.

[MikeSteelBe]

Do you know why God created Adam before Eve?

God did not need a woman standing there telling Him how to make Adam.

[metmom]

Ok. Let’s dissect the very first one. Seems like it makes some sense……..but since men have to pee constantly due to an enlarged prostate or too much beer they have to go ten times more per day than women soooooooo, the toilet seat position should be down to accommodate a woman who goes maybe four times per day.

On what planet do you have women who only need to pee four times a day?

Besides, enlarged prostrates affect how long it takes a guy to pee, not the frequency. Beer, OTOH, yeah, but still not enough of a reason.

Besides, for guys living out in the country, peeing around the garden is good deterrent for animals which might consider snacking in the garden.

So do the real guy thing and just go outside and do it and you won’t have to worry about the seat position.

[metmom]

Easy.

Men, do the dishes and guess what?

You’ll get warmer welcome in bed unless you’re married to a woman with a her made of stone.

[metmom]

As a matter of biology, however, particularly after a woman bears children but very often long before, the few seconds to lower the seat often results in her not can’t make it in time. .

Especially in the actively being pregnant phase, when you have a baby tap dancing on your bladder day and night.

It doesn’t take much activity from that baby to result in an emergency trip to the bathroom.

Courtesy, such a lost art

You nailed it. And it’s a two way street.

Anyone going into a relationship with a *rules for how to live with me* attitude is doomed to a failed relationship.

Ironically, men brag about not needing women and that they are MGTOW, and yet when women do the same, they are accused by men of being men hating, world destroying feminists.

[metmom]

As a single woman for close to a decade, I’ve noticed that single men are invited to more social events, are invited to married couples homes for dinner, and are “adopted,” by several married couples who take care of them.

Truth there.

If I am out of town, everyone feels sorry for poor mr. mm and invites him over for a meal so he doesn’t have to cook for himself or be all alone.

When he’s out of town, not a soul does the same for me. Nor any other woman I know of.

It never seems to occur to others that a woman would like the same courtesy.

[Kevmo]

Yeah, I’ve seen your cheerbullyeader aphorisms before and they’re basically not true.

[Varsity Flight]

Have a dishwasher. Just dry them mostly.
Then there’s little things mean a lot.

1. I do the little things.
2. Wait by faith
3. The Lord Living God does the big things.

Happy Valentine’s Day everybody!!

💟💟💟💟

[metmom]

The “little things” are what send a woman the message that her husband still cares about her and notices what she does for him. When he does something that takes the pressure of the relentlessly endless household chores off a woman, it is very much appreciated.

Men come home from work and often their day is done and they can leave work at work and relax at home.

Housework, work that is done at home all the time, is not a 9-5 job. After dinner is made, there’s still a kitchen to clean up and kids to put to bed. And you get no weekends and evenings off. It’s staring you in the face 24/7, day after day, whether you feel good or are sick as a dog. And you know that hard as you work at it, by noon tomorrow if you don’t do the same mind-numbingly boring chores AGAIN, the place will look like a bomb went off.

Basically women live at work and work is never done. THAT is why men helping with housework means so much to a woman. I would not imagine a man who was forced to live at work and expected to be on call 24/7 when his boss demanded something be done immediately would find it a very acceptable arrangement.

I read an account once of a woman who one day decided not to do her usual stuff. Her husband comes home, finds the place a disaster, the kids still in their pjs, food everywhere, nothing cleaned up. In a panic he goes looking for his wife thinking something happened to her and finds her still in bed in her pjs reading a book.

When asked what was up, she said, “*Every day when you come home, you ask me what I did today. Well, today I didn’t do it.*

NOBODY likes to be taken for granted. People just end up feeling like they are being used that way.

What men consider little things can be really big to a woman, not because she can’t do them herself, but because of the message that it sends her that she is worth the effort for the man to take to notice and do them for her. We KNOW that it’s an effort on a man’s part to do that and any woman worth her salt appreciates it.

[SauronOfMordor]

1. Men want sex as often as you want the dishes done.

Very true!

[Toespi]

Funny! (I may have exaggerated a little on the go per day for women)