Posted on 09/29/2021 6:18:55 AM PDT by dynachrome
After a weeks-long trial, R&B Singer R. Kelly has been found to be an evil abuser, guilty of the crimes of racketeering and sex trafficking while failing to be the son of the President.
"Living the Hunter Biden lifestyle while failing to be Hunter Biden is a very serious offense," said prosecutors to the media. "We are seeking the maximum sentence of life in prison for this horrific crime."
According to legal experts, you should always make sure you are the white, wealthy son of a U.S. President before engaging in sex trafficking and racketeering. Since R. Kelly callously failed to do that, he will go to prison instead of making millions of dollars and being awarded a job as a college professor like Hunter Biden.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Outstanding. The Bee always comes through!
This is funny!
Sad but true
Painfully accurate satire. Bee... you win again.
OMG! Eat your heart out CNN, scooped again
Wow... that’s an impressive one.
Look at the bright side - he can always throw some paint up against a canvas and make millions that way. (or maybe not)
Joe Biden could adopt him, but that costs 20% for the Big Guy.
It’s not so much white privilege as political privilege.
An otherwise fake degree from an Ivy League University also helps.
"When crime and criminals are thrust before us, they are to be met by all the energies that God has given us by argument, scorn, sarcasm and denunciation."
DAMN SON! That’s BITING.
“It ain’t me, it ain’t me, I ain’t no President’s son...”
Omg...lol. When satire becomes truer then “the news”.
bttt
Indeed doing what the MSM fails to do reporting truth.
This needs to be spread to make some feel uncomfortable.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.