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They walk among us
email from friend | 5/13/2021 | multiple

Posted on 05/13/2021 8:50:51 AM PDT by sodpoodle

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"They walk amongst us" - they do if you are not in 'lockdown', quarantine', or 'isolation'.
1 posted on 05/13/2021 8:50:51 AM PDT by sodpoodle
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An extra!!!

In response to President Biden’s complaint that FOX News doesn’t show enough Black and Hispanic people on their network, FOX has announced that they will now air “America’s Most Wanted “ TWICE a week.


2 posted on 05/13/2021 8:54:04 AM PDT by sodpoodle
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To: Liz; poconopundit; null and void

Traffic Camera.

A man was driving when he saw the flash of a traffic camera.

He figured that his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though he knew that he was not speeding.

Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed.

Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed.

He tried a fourth time with the same result.

He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a snail’s pace.

Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for ‘Driving without a seat belt.’

ping


3 posted on 05/13/2021 8:55:58 AM PDT by GOPJ (The world's thugs aren't afraid to kick sand in Biden's face... none of 'em. It's gonna get worse)
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To: sodpoodle

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted,

“Look at that dead bird!”

Someone looked up at the sky and said,

“Where?”


I pull that on kids all the time!.....................


4 posted on 05/13/2021 8:56:08 AM PDT by Red Badger (Jesus said there is no marriage in Heaven. That's why they call it Heaven.....................)
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To: sodpoodle

They also generally vote socialist (Liberal and NDP in Kanadahar, Democrat in the US) and have no clue about anything.


5 posted on 05/13/2021 8:57:33 AM PDT by A Formerly Proud Canadian (I once was blind but now I see... )
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To: sodpoodle

“I drove down in a convertible.” then she said,

“I didn’t think I’d get sunburned because the car was moving.”


Can I guess her hair color?.....................


6 posted on 05/13/2021 8:57:34 AM PDT by Red Badger (Jesus said there is no marriage in Heaven. That's why they call it Heaven.....................)
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To: Red Badger

That’s cruel:)


7 posted on 05/13/2021 8:57:48 AM PDT by sodpoodle
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To: sodpoodle

It tells me which are the smart kids................


8 posted on 05/13/2021 9:00:28 AM PDT by Red Badger (Jesus said there is no marriage in Heaven. That's why they call it Heaven.....................)
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To: sodpoodle

The last one is hysterical...!


9 posted on 05/13/2021 9:00:56 AM PDT by LibertyWoman
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To: sodpoodle

Many moons ago we did a survey for the high school paper. We asked dozens of graduating seniors simple questions like “which two oceans border the USA” and “which two countries border the USA”. Barely 50% could answer.

Needless to say, they didn’t let us publish the story.

One asked us if the sun was always round. She said “you know, like the moon isn’t always round”.


10 posted on 05/13/2021 9:05:17 AM PDT by monkeyshine (live and let live is dead)
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To: sodpoodle
Overheard as a school teacher conducted her students through a museum:

"Now children, in this room we're going to learn about World War Eleven."

11 posted on 05/13/2021 9:08:27 AM PDT by Savage Beast (Depravity is the evil heart of the Democrat Party.)
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To: Red Badger; sodpoodle

Shouldn’t it be “The blonde looked up at the sky and said...”?


12 posted on 05/13/2021 9:09:57 AM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom (“No man’s life, liberty or property are safe while the Legislature is in session" - Gideon J. Tucker)
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To: sodpoodle

Reminds me of the old “Why is gullible written on the ceiling?” My kids will still fall for that one!


13 posted on 05/13/2021 9:12:35 AM PDT by cdcdawg (It's all on .gum these days.)
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To: monkeyshine

I’m pretty sure that the Artic Ocean borders the USA.


14 posted on 05/13/2021 9:12:41 AM PDT by Lonesome in Massachussets (Diana Moon Glampers for Secretary of Education! )
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To: ProtectOurFreedom

A variation I have heard.....................


15 posted on 05/13/2021 9:13:18 AM PDT by Red Badger (Jesus said there is no marriage in Heaven. That's why they call it Heaven.....................)
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To: sodpoodle

My shrink said to me, “Your problem is you’ve got a split personality. That’ll be $100.”

I said, “Here’s $50. Get the rest from the other guy.”


16 posted on 05/13/2021 9:14:34 AM PDT by Ken H (Trump won.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

I suppose. Some call it the Arctic Sea. But we weren’t as smart as you are, just high school kids no trick questions :-)


17 posted on 05/13/2021 9:16:43 AM PDT by monkeyshine (live and let live is dead)
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To: sodpoodle

Remember, almost half the people are below average...


18 posted on 05/13/2021 9:18:30 AM PDT by Little Ray (Corporations don't pay taxes. They collect them.)
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To: Little Ray

How many of each type of animal did Moses take on the ARK ?


19 posted on 05/13/2021 9:29:35 AM PDT by algore
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To: Little Ray

I’m convinced it’s more than half.


20 posted on 05/13/2021 9:30:22 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux - The Ultimate Windows Service Pack )
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