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Elon Musk Purchases All of Austin, Dubs Himself Iron Mayor
Austin Chronicle ^ | 2 April 2021 | MIKE CLARK-MADISON,

Posted on 04/01/2021 6:10:41 PM PDT by DUMBGRUNT

Proclaiming "an end to a century's worth of frustration and a great day for the schoolchildren of Texas," Gov. Greg Abbott signed into law today (Thursday, April 1) Senate Bill 3236, authorizing the purchase of the entire city of Austin, excepting the Capitol Complex and University of Texas campus, by area Technoking Elon Musk, henceforth to also hold the title of "Iron Mayor."

The surprise offer by Musk encountered little resistance from members of the Texas Legislature, which quickly approved the measure by voice vote in both chambers, with only Sen. Sarah Eckhardt, D-Austin, and five Austin-based members of the Texas House indicating their opposition for the record. "I firmly believe that the people of Travis County and the state of Texas both deserve a better deal than the one offered by Elon Musk," said Eckhardt, dodging the movers sent by Patrick to box up her office and evict her from the Capitol before nightfall. "I know we will look back and regret this missed opportunity."

Other leaders expressed a more positive view, noting that Musk's move also frees Austinites from the often oppressive interventions of Abbott and the Texas Legis­lature. "Hey, we could certainly have done worse," said current Mayor Pro Tem Natasha Harper-Madison. "I mean, Elon Musk is fricking weird, but so is Greg Abbott! As long as he doesn't turn around and sell out to Amazon or Facebook, we could probably make this work."

(Excerpt) Read more at austinchronicle.com ...


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: fakenews; gomusk
With Musk, you never know for sure.
1 posted on 04/01/2021 6:10:41 PM PDT by DUMBGRUNT
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Well, do you actually believe this? Why not?


2 posted on 04/01/2021 6:12:20 PM PDT by Richard Axtell (President Asterisk is an ass to risk the economy and rights of all Americans.)
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Mike, Mike, Mike what day is it? That’s right, April 1st. :)


3 posted on 04/01/2021 6:13:32 PM PDT by Equine1952
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Please consider the date of all such stories.


4 posted on 04/01/2021 6:13:44 PM PDT by Dave Wright
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To: DUMBGRUNT

He paid for it with spare bitcoin he had in his pocket.


5 posted on 04/01/2021 6:15:19 PM PDT by monkeyshine (live and let live is dead)
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Space Force Central?


6 posted on 04/01/2021 6:15:26 PM PDT by PGalt (past peak civilization?)
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To: DUMBGRUNT

There are Austinites who will believe this.


7 posted on 04/01/2021 6:17:07 PM PDT by dynachrome ("I will not be reconstructed, and I do not give a damn.")
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To: DUMBGRUNT
How many engines will it take to blast the whole city into space, Elon?
I will donate to such a worthy cause...
8 posted on 04/01/2021 6:22:33 PM PDT by ZOOKER (Until further notice the /s is implied...)
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Best line of the satire referring to annoying Austin residents

“This bold action secures a bright future for our state while ridding us of our most annoying constituents.”– Gov. Greg Abbott at an April 1 signing ceremony passing ownership of the city of Austin to Technoking Elon Musk


9 posted on 04/01/2021 6:34:01 PM PDT by chuckee
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To: chuckee

Bringing Home a baby Bumblebee.

Abbott might possibly be “The Man”. Bwaahaaaa!


10 posted on 04/01/2021 7:08:06 PM PDT by Equine1952
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To: DUMBGRUNT

He’ll have passports from S. Africa, Canada, USA, and Texas.


11 posted on 04/01/2021 7:10:06 PM PDT by nascarnation
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To: DUMBGRUNT; Texas Fossil

Bkmk


12 posted on 04/01/2021 7:16:24 PM PDT by ptsal (Vote R.E.D. >>>Remove Every Democrat ***)
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To: DUMBGRUNT

I think he would be a great mayor.

He’d definitely keep Austin Weird, but in a good way.


13 posted on 04/01/2021 7:17:40 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: dynachrome

Enough acid and the libs in Austin would believe anything.


14 posted on 04/01/2021 7:19:49 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Lean on Joe Biden to follow Donald Trump's example and donate his annual salary to charity. )
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To: DUMBGRUNT

Musk is becoming a big employer in Austin.


15 posted on 04/02/2021 6:46:58 AM PDT by ckilmer
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