Posted on 03/28/2021 3:40:11 PM PDT by FLT-bird
BEAVERTON, OR—Sneaker manufacturer Nike has graciously reached out to the Biden administration with an offer to house thousands of unaccompanied migrant children at their factories around the globe.
“Nike is committed to being a good corporate citizen. We are proud to assist the Biden administration by caring for these unaccompanied migrant children,” a spokesman for the company said Friday. “We have plenty of factories all around the globe with lots of room for kids. We’re here to help!”
The spokesman said that the migrant children will be fed, clothed, and educated by Nike employees until permanent homes can be found for them. In addition to a regular school curriculum, Nike said they will focus heavily on recreational activities.
“The core of our plan is our arts and crafts program,” the spokesman said. “These lucky kids will get to spend up to 18 hours each day on fun activities such as leather-working, sewing, and embroidery. What could possibly be more fun than that?”
White House press secretary Jen Psaki said the move makes sense on many levels. “When it comes to looking after thousands of orphaned children from impoverished countries, nobody has more experience than Nike,” she noted.
How about the Lil F@g sneakers with the drop of Chinese sweatshop blood? Maybe Karamela will wear a fresh pair...
happy Easter
Caption for fist raising photo....
It said in Genesis that Abraham’s offspring would someday be as numerous as the stars in the sky. My Benjamins coming in for virtue signaling will be as numerous as the hairs on my head. I’m rich.
Evil shoe caption....
I may have to sit between two high school girls at the salon to get my nails done but I be a bad dude. Bad.
It’s only funny, and sad, because it’s true. How in the hell can any business get away with this? But you know, the little check mark next to the BLM insignia looks perfectly natural on athletes’ uniforms.
Thank you for not putting a satire tag in the title.
Much more fun!!!!
“The Bee does it again.”
This is one of the best Bee stings ever. Utter destruction.
Ditto.
They’ll even throw in a special pair of sneakers for the first 666 arrivals.
Once in a while an erudite FReeper comes up with a line that is truly satirical and outstanding.
The writers at Babylon Bee do it everyday. And this story about ‘woke’ NIKE housing the illegals of the world is one their best.
Slave labor...
Satire.
Nike is so nice. They’re giving all the children an allowance😉
I fell for that until I saw the source.
Same. But Nike and Other Woke Companies could step up,.....and house all of the new waves of workers in China!!
Funny... I love it... Arts and crafts for kids... 👍
LOL
Better make it four per domicile. Biden only got around 30 million legitimate votes.
2nd that crap..............
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