made 
Posted on 12/22/2020 3:04:55 PM PST by sodpoodle
1.Q: Why did the cloud date the fog? A: He was so down to earth.
2.Q: Why are chemists so good at solving problems? A: They’re always working with solutions.
3.Q: What did one tectonic plate say when he bumped into another? A: Sorry! My Fault.
4.Q: What did the infectious disease say when the bartender refused him service? A: Well, you’re not a very good host.
5.Q: How did the thermometer insult the graduated cylinder? A: She said, “You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.”
6.Q: What will never go viral no matter how popular they get? A: Antibiotics. 7Q: Why is so hard to wake up in the morning? A: Newton’s First Law: A body at rest wants to stay at rest. 8Q: Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous? A: That’s how you become a black hole. 9Q: What did the science book say to the math book? A: You’ve got problems. 10.Q: What are the primary elements of a sense of humor? A: Sulfur, Argon, Calcium, and Samarium. Otherwise known as SArCaSm 11.Q: What do protons and life coaches have in common? A: They know how to stay positive 12.Q: Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere? A: It made him feel like he was in his element. 13.Q: What did the helpless T cell say when facing the infection? A: Is there antibody out there? 14.Q: Why is combining a proton and an electron to make a neutron so popular? A: It’s free of charge.
(Excerpt) Read more at msn.com ...
If you're not part of the solution you're part of the precipitate.
Good ones!
The one about SArCaSm reminded me of how I would fight boredom in class by making words from the abbreviated names of the elements (and yes, that was one of them). Surprising how many such words there are.
made
Very funny. Now I'm gonna tell it to someone else and pretend that I'm smart.
So, did Einstein pressure Newton for an answer.
Thanks. I’ll mention it to my son and d-i-l. They are amazing in their home-schooling. The 6 year old can rattle off the periodic table of elements like he is saying the ABC’s.
LOL...
True. But blonde jokes are the funniest of all.
For those of you also taking Game Theory, your grade in that class will be based on how close your grade on this exam is to 80% of the average
https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/2385:_Final_Exam
So the cop pulled Heisenberg, who was racing through town in his BMW, over for speeding.
The cop says, “Do you know how fast you were going?”
Heisenberg said, “No, but I know where I am”.
Try running it through this: http://www.outline.com just open it up and PASTE the URL into Outline and wait a moment.
Then just a quick Select, Copy and Paste.
Enjoy;)
The 24 Funniest Science Jokes
Q: Why did the cloud date the fog?
A: He was so down to earth.
Q: Why are chemists so good at solving problems?
A: They’re always working with solutions.
Q: What did one tectonic plate say when he bumped into another?
A: Sorry! My Fault.
Q: What did the infectious disease say when the bartender refused him service?
A: Well, you’re not a very good host.
Q: How did the thermometer insult the graduated cylinder?
A: She said, “You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.”
Q: What will never go viral no matter how popular they get?
A: Antibiotics.
Q: Why is so hard to wake up in the morning?
A: Newton’s First Law: A body at rest wants to stay at rest.
Q: Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous?
A: That’s how you become a black hole.
Q: What did the science book say to the math book?
A: You’ve got problems.
Q: What are the primary elements of a sense of humor?
A: Sulfur, Argon, Calcium, and Samarium. Otherwise known as SArCaSm
Q: What do protons and life coaches have in common?
A: They know how to stay positive
Q: Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere?
A: It made him feel like he was in his element.
Q: What did the helpless T cell say when facing the infection?
A: Is there antibody out there?
Q: Why is combining a proton and an electron to make a neutron so popular?
A: It’s free of charge.
Q: Why did the physicist break up with the biologist?
A: There was no chemistry.
Q: What did the proton say to the electron to start a fight?
A: I’m sick of your negativity.
Q: What’s a pirate’s favorite element?
A: Aaaaargon
Q: How do geologists ask each other out?
A: They say, “Are you a carbon sample? Because I’d love to date you.”
Q: Why couldn’t the geologist think of the joke?
A: It was on the tip of her tungsten!
Q: Why were oxygen, hydrogen, and carbon wearing suits and ties?
A: They were a formyl group.
Q: What did the scientist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs?
A: Sorry for your sulfering.
Q: What do you call it when a biologist takes a photo of herself?
A: A cell-fie
Q: Why is the ocean so salty?
A: The land never waves back!
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, “No, I’m traveling light.”
What do you get when you turn a blond upside down?
And adults are hard put to keep their poker face.
Ancient and classic humor. I have to say that, after ten children’s worth of diapers and additional elimination disasters, I’m impervious to scatological “humor.”
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That was PAINFUL!
I cheated and looked up the answer. No wonder you didn't post it!
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