Posted on 12/06/2020 6:18:45 PM PST by LibWhacker
NEW YORK, NY—A special ABC News report Friday stated that a deranged President Donald Trump nuked the entire world, flattening the entirety of civilization into a gooey nothingness, before later issuing a minor correction stating that he actually just microwaved a burrito.
ABC News reporter Brian Ross broke the erroneous story, describing in great detail how Trump had finally decided he’d had enough and launched over 4,000 nuclear warheads at every single country on the planet. The White House quickly disputed the story, however, pointing out that in reality, the only thing Trump had nuked was a microwavable burrito “for 90 seconds on High.”
“We apologize for the minor error,” an ABC News spokesperson said Monday after the clarification had been issued. “One of our reporters did seem to suggest that Donald Trump instigated a nuclear apocalypse, destroying nearly all of humanity, and we recognize that is a minor factual error when compared with the actual event that occurred, that being the simple microwaving of a frozen snack.”
At publishing time, ABC News had reported that former National Security Advisor Michael Flynn was a Russian spy, before later clarifying that he had simply been seen purchasing a bottle of vodka.
And it turned out to be Smirnoff Vodka, that was distilled in the USA.
Still, nuking a burrito ... why does he hate Mexicans?
I was hoping he nuked a burro, i.e., donkey.
Microwaves are bad juju for mother earth. Trump hates the big mama.
'burrito' is the pronoun for a female donkey that identifies as a mail.
Tonight on ABC news Rudy was hospitalized and they made it sound like he was on his death bed... but he did speak to reporters this morning. Rudy is Rarely seen wearing a mask. Here are some pictures of Rudy with Trump who ALSO doesn’t wear a mask.. but they can’t tell you what he said to the reporter this morning because they were unfounded allegations that Trump had not lost the election.
That’s a guy I can relate to...I’ve nuked many a burrito!
Codes are provided by the head WH chef, whom Orange Man promoted to Chief Nuke Guy.
So yeah, "sources say 'it was a burrito this time, but the Sharp microwave can be programmed by Orange Man at any moment'."
Other WH kitchen sources say "Orange Man is deranged and should be barred from the kitchen immediately."
Back when Smirnoff Vodka was scarce in the USA, I bought a bottle of the Russian stuff and a can of very good Russian caviar for a friend ‘s birthday. He was a self-declared communist.
He was, of course, suitably impressed until I reminded him that his treats were purchased with Capitalist dollars.
How do you say Idiot in Russian?
Love it!
For a short while in the early 1990s we had reasonably good relations with Russia and I went there on business a few times.
The most prestigious brand of vodka in Russia was Smirnoff. The Stolichnaya that we think is so wonderful over here is considered barely above sewer water in Russia.
90 seconds on high? That’s just crazy!
AssBackwardsCommunists have done as much already in their misreporting
TRULY FAKE NEWS
Trump does NOT drink
The vodka purchaser, in this story, was meant to be LTG Flynn, not President Trump. However I don’t know if LTG Flynn drinks adult beverages or not.
Great info re Smirnoff. That is what I buy. And not much of it. A bottle in the summer for Vodka Tonics, and one year I forgot I had it, was still in the fridge in November. I’m the only person in a family of alcoholics who doesn’t give a flying fig about the stuff, other than a nice Merlot with dinner “for my health’s sake.”
I’ve always wanted to go to St. Petersburg. Beautiful city, fabulous art. Have you been there?
And Siberia fascinates me. Such beautiful sturdy wild horses, such strong people. I do NOT wish to visit, however
My cat has an account on Twitter and one of her fave followers is “Putin” a one-eyed black cat.
"It's the Final Countdooooown....."
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.