Posted on 11/23/2020 12:52:43 PM PST by BipolarBob
U.S.—In an open letter addressed to state officials, Walmart leadership expressed gratefulness to the government for inflating their sales and stock price while completely pulverizing their small business competition.
"Yeah, we know 2020 has been tough for the little people," said one board member while shoveling piles of cash into his vault. "But it's been super great for us! No longer do we have to worry about the baker down the street or the family-owned hardware store next door taking away some of our business. The government just blew them up! We didn't even ask them to! Can you believe it? What luck!"
According to reports, Americans are really looking forward to giving all their business solely to giant mega-corporations like Walmart, Amazon, and McDonald's until all local culture has disappeared.
"This is my dream come true!" said Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos. "Within 10 years, everyone will be wearing the same identical futuristic grey jumpsuit and eating Amazon-issued food cubes, just like in the movies! That will be so cool."
Sources indicate most powerful corporations are advocating at least one more year of lockdowns to make sure small business competition stays dead. "We have to make sure those uppity business owners never threaten us again," said Bezos while sitting in a massive chair and stroking a white cat
Yes.
Yes, it’s satire but it’s also damn close to reality.
Hannity is still a big Walmart fan. Unlike Carlson, he seems oblivious as to how woke it has become in recent years.
By the way, I will never shop at Walmart. That has nothing to do with this article.
Walmart never considered them competition in the first. More like competitive decoration that kept Wal-Mart from being pursued for monopolistic practices in the decades before Amazon really started competing with them.
Yep. Jeff Bezos would also like to extend thanks to the government for shutting down brick and mortar retail.
I live literally working walking distance to the Walmart headquarters.
What the bee says here is only half of it, in reality Walmart has profited more than people may realize. Every conversation in this town is about Walmart.
I’m pretty sure Walmart headquarters is in Bentonville AR, not Pennsylvania.
I remember the first time I stepped into a Super Walmart.
As I watched an elderly women on an electric cart at the checkout counter trying to locate her husband on her cellphone, a thought crossed my mind... “GOVERNMENT STORE.”
I live in Bentonville.
Trying to get back to PA but you know what they say about plans.
Just going by your homepage. I’m close by as well. But not walking distance, PTL.
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