Posted on 07/01/2019 12:06:35 PM PDT by CondoleezzaProtege
In American culture, we believe that men can never be entirely trusted in the realm of the physical. We collectively suspect that, given the opportunity, men will collapse into the sexual at a moment’s notice. That men don’t know how to physically connect otherwise. That men can’t control themselves. That men are dogs.
There is no corresponding narrative about women.
And where does this leave men? Physically and emotionally isolated. Cut off from the deeply human physical contact that is proven to reduce stress, encourage self esteem and create community. Instead, we walk in the vast crowds of our cities alone in a desert of disconnection. Starving for physical connection.
How often do men actually get the opportunity to express affection through long lasting platonic touch? How often does it happen between men? Or between men and women? Not a hand shake or a hug, but lasting physical contact between two people that is comforting and personal but not sexual. Between persons who are not lovers and never will be. Think, holding hands. Or leaning on each other. Sitting together...And if you are a man, imagine a five minutes of contact with another man. How quickly does that idea raise the ugly specter of homophobia? And why?
I doubt its a question the average Italian man would ever ask himself. But here in America, generations of Puritanical sexual shaming have made it a central question. By putting the fear of the sexual first in all our interactions, we have thrown out the baby with the bathwater, avoiding all contact rather than risk even the hint of unwanted sexual touch.
American culture leaves boys few options. While aggression on the basketball court or bullying in the locker room often results in sporadic moments of human contact, gentleness likely does not...
(Excerpt) Read more at goodmenproject.com ...
Blessings to you.
Are you saying my father (regular hunter growing up, gun-toting protector to moms parents during Baltimore riots, etc) his father (WWI artillery France) and my other grandfather (slaughterhouse owner, Liberty ship builder, and riot protector as well) are not men enough to handle anything and are “feminized”?
You would be SORELY mistaken.
If feminized means holding Christian behavior, then I’m all for it.
When Isay I have plenty experience on FR’s “women” threads I mean it. It’s the same old woman bashing and extreme redneck stereotyping and chest-thumping about how men have to be careless soulless assholes with zero care for anyone, their feelings or opinions, by their very descriptions. Someone reads only FR they might think that is what a “real” man is. Anything else seems to be their definition of “woman”.
You as well.
I appreciate it.
But your father, and his confreres, did love one another, and express their love in a physical way, which was most likely platonic - didn’t they?
(just trying to stick with the subject of the original post...)
They were Brothers in the sense of shared combat experience, shared hardships, and shared victories.
Highly doubtful that they EVER would have thought of it as “love”.
They formed lifelong friendships, helped each other out through rough times after the war as well.
Again, I don’t think they thought of it as “love” - just “Hey... these guys saved my life. I owe them.”
And if by “physical” you mean a handshake and a slap on the back, offering a cigar and shot of bourbon when they saw each other, yes.
Any other physical way, no, not so much. Not in my line of sight.
“...And you don’t call that ‘love’?...”
No, I call that friendship. Or Brotherhood, maybe.
Maybe you read something different from the article than I did. I’ll leave it there.
Have a good night.
According to The Man Law, if you have to hold your wife’s purse, you must hold as if you are carrying a football.
Ah, but then you would be acting on YOUR perceptions and what YOU would want. I hope your feelings don't get you into trouble, Mrs. Biden.
So the only good men are Christian men? Wow, that kinda cuts the "available" pool down a bit.
If those are your requirements, fine. But don't try to make such a broad statement for the rest of mankind.
And yet...
And yet...
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer
HorsePucky
And you don't understand the diffent languages of the sexes. It seems as tho you want men to have a female's perspective on the subject of love and touching. Unless you know the difference, you're coming at this all wrong.
Each sex has defined roles. It's best not to blur the lines.
Oh, and I'm a girl, I would have no sooner asked my husband to hold my purse (why would I need him to do that? Didn't I pack the purse knowing that I would be responsible for it? And as for feminine products...uhhh, I'm the girl, it's my responsibility to attend to my feminine needs. This would be akin to my husband asking me to go to the next furnace job and replace the thermocouple, or telling me I had to field dress a deer. We each had our roles/jobs to fulfill)
Thumbs up on your comment!
Yep - seems like he’s saying “give it a try - you’ll like it”...
Went to the site and it seems “The Good Men Project” has the purpose of indoctrinating children on up to the “normalcy” of the abnormal...
OMG... “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles”.
Best scene ever! Haha!
Outstanding post.
:^)
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