Florida man posing as FBI agent dumps live catfish on family’s driveway, cops say

Miami Herald ^ | 5/14/2019

[Gamecock]

A Florida man drunkenly posed as an FBI agent and accused a family of harboring illegal aliens, then dumped live catfish on their driveway and fled, according to local authorities.

Kristian Dudley, a 42-year-old homeless man in Naples, Florida, was arrested after the incident on Friday and faces charges of impersonating a law enforcement officer and open container, Collier County jail records said. He

[Gamecock]

[PGR88]

So how did they figure out he was an FBI agent?

[Gamecock]

So many good lines!

Dudley “appeared to be heavily intoxicated” around 9:30 p.m. when a deputy responded to a report that a man on a bike

Despite wearing an FBI hat, Dudley denied telling people he was an FBI agent, explaining that “he only wears the hat so he doesn’t get beat up,” according to deputies.

Dudley had ridden up to a woman there on his bike with flashing blue and red lights,

Dudley “dropped multiple live catfish in the driveway for (an) unknown reason,” according to the arrest report.

I'm guessing he gets beat up a lot.

[VastRWCon]

Not FBI dude, you should have played ICE.

[Lurker]

Fried catfish. Yum. Too bad he didn’t leave beer.

L

[Buckeye McFrog]

Looks too honest to be an FBI agent.

[aynrandfreak]

I hope this won’t interfere with his help on Huber’s investigation.

[Diana in Wisconsin]

Homeless to begin with and then a bail of over $5K? A new and creative way to get housed, showered and fed for a few weeks!

Methinks, ‘Florida Man’ ain’t so dumb after all! ;)

[nuconvert]

One of my favorites...”Dudley had ridden up to a woman there on his bike with flashing blue and red lights”

Lol

[DivineMomentsOfTruth]

Florida Man!

[cuban leaf]

Free food!

[sparklite2]

"So long, and thanks for the fish."

[OKSooner]

Channel cats or Blue cats?

Makes a big difference.

[Moonman62]

Eddie Munster is all grown up.

[Dr. Sivana]

Naples has homeless men? Well, at least theirs have style.

[rlmorel]

Dumping fish...must be a Florida thing or FBI thing.

Lisa Page dumping fish on Peter Strzok is a form of FBI foreplay...

[treetopsandroofs]

FWIW, this is all we have on the victim’s citizenship status.

“The woman said she was a U.S. citizen, told him to leave her yard and threatened to call police.”

She’s not a fan of catfish, either, although all nastiness might have been avoided if he’d presented her with the fish first.

Just another day for “Florida Man”.

I liked Patrick Man better.

[gaijin]

had ridden up to a woman there on his bike with flashing blue and red lights,

[treetopsandroofs]

Very nice.

[Dr. Sivana]

I'm guessing he gets beat up a lot. He might be able to make a decent living charging to role-play an FBI agent who gets beaten up.