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Captain Li Shang relieved of command for toxic masculinity
duffleblog ^ | 21 Jan 2018 | Jake Slager

Posted on 01/21/2019 8:50:08 AM PST by rey

CHANGCHUN, China — The Chinese Army relieved a decorated army officer and son of legendary Gen. Li of his command position after details were leaked that the promising young officer had “fostered a command climate of toxic masculinity,” sources confirmed today.

While training recruits for war against the invading Hun Army, Capt. Shang reportedly abused his primarily male recruits, asking if their families had sent daughters when he’d asked for sons. Several of Li’s troops have come forward with allegations against him, and many more anonymous complaints have been received by Imperial Headquarters.

Li screamed at his troops to “be a man” no less than nine times, according to eyewitnesses. Several other reports claim he told the trainees he would “make a man out of them.”

Imperial advisor Chi Fu was appointed to investigate the claims, a decision met with criticism. One recruit, Fa Ping, has reported that Chi is equally misogynistic in his regular professional conduct. Despite the criticism and expectations that the investigation would quickly exonerate the captain, Chi claims to have already found staggering evidence of an anti-woman command culture.

“The captain and troops have accused me of squealing like a girl, revealing what is clearly a culture of systemic misogyny,” said Chi Fu. “And that’s only what I experienced directly. I have heard whispers that Shang would be willing to execute a woman simply for joining the army, which I would have no part of. I am completely loyal to the emperor’s intersectional guidance plan and believe that our strength is not in what’s considered ‘manly,’ but rather diversity.”

The toxic masculinity scandal has rocked the Chinese Army particularly hard as it comes on the heels of a sensational report that claims nearly 100 percent of the troops were the same race, dipping readiness far below necessary levels. The one silver lining according to that report was that the army had exactly zero white people, a welcome statistic.

In response to the investigation’s initial findings, Imperial Headquarters has decided to put Li Shang on unpaid administrative leave and send his recruits home with service waivers.

At press time, all parties involved were seen being assimilated into Hun culture.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: homosexualagenda; humor; masculinity; military; satire
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To: JohnG45

General Tso?

I heard he’s chicken.


61 posted on 01/21/2019 12:01:13 PM PST by Alas Babylon! (The media is after us. Trump's just in the way.)
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To: ken in texas

But it is not satire. It is a fictitious cartoon character.


62 posted on 01/21/2019 12:32:10 PM PST by rey
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To: JohnG45

General Tso was a chicken.


63 posted on 01/21/2019 12:33:11 PM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: ken in texas

And the lead picture on the piece is a cartoon.
Sheesh!


64 posted on 01/21/2019 12:33:35 PM PST by rey
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To: gibsonguy

Well, does China have an Emperor? ;)

Looks like straight-up spoof.


65 posted on 01/21/2019 1:56:21 PM PST by lepton ("It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into"--Jonathan Swift)
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To: gibsonguy

The toxic masculinity scandal has rocked the Chinese Army particularly hard as it comes on the heels of a sensational report that claims nearly 100 percent of the troops were the same race, dipping readiness far below necessary levels.

The one silver lining according to that report was that the army had exactly zero white people, a welcome statistic.

At press time, all parties involved were seen being assimilated into Hun culture.


66 posted on 01/21/2019 1:57:39 PM PST by lepton ("It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into"--Jonathan Swift)
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