Posted on 11/01/2018 10:51:15 AM PDT by Beautiful_Gracious_Skies
A British woman who claims to have had sex with over 20 ghosts has finally found love. Amethyst Realm, 30, announced this week that after much deliberation over the look and size of a ring, she is now engaged to a spirit named Ray.
Back in December, Realm told the British talk show This Morning that she had stopped having sex with real, living men since she preferred ghosts instead. And now shes found The One.
Then, one day, while I was walking through the bush, enjoying nature, I suddenly felt this incredible energy. A new lover had arrived, she told The Sun. From experience, I knew spirits tend to stay in one place, but something amazing happened.
Realm then added she met him again on a plane ride, where he began seducing her. I was happy and excited so excited that we had to do something about it. So we headed to the plane loo and, well, I am now a member of the Mile High Club, she said....
But it was Rays proposal that really made things special. There was no going down on one knee he doesnt have knees. But for the first time, I heard him speak, she said, claiming she heard the words Will you marry me? echo in a nearby cave while on her nature walk. I could actually hear his voice and it was beautiful. Deep, sexy and real.
And while everything sounds blissful and seamless, Realm is dealing with a minor hangup. She wants kids, but shes not sure Ray does. I dont want to scare him off by talking about babies, she said. It seems that ghosting is more popular among young people than ever before.
That really looks like one of those models made up from a skeleton of some early hominid (female?!).
She has teeth only a ghost could love.
Ghosts can't father children. They have a hollow weenie. (Fifth grade joke)
LGBTQIAG
Second G, the love that dare not speak its name. Because it’s been too stupid. Until now.
She believes that part is there. Amethyst stated they consummated their love ‘in the loo on the plane’ and boasts membership in The Mile High Club.
Ghosts are extremely commitment adverse. She needs to just give him some breathing space.
Sequel! : The Corpse Groom!
So that is what goes bump bump bump in the night
It would never work anyway. Apparently, ghosts are very fond of extremely cold rooms. And just ask George Costanzas about the inevitable “shrinkage” that accompanies cold.
It will be hard too catch him if he start’s cheating on her. Wait till she shows up with a baby to collect welfare and claims the baby-daddy is a ghost.
In related news...
While Realm and her ghostly lover, Ray, will be getting married next summer, they are following in the footsteps of another woman from the UK. She married the ghost of an 18th-century pirate.
So to get that one into bed the best pick up line is “Boo!”
Add a letter to LGBT: W for wacky. Will there be calls for human-spirit marriage? Will there be a new word: ghostophobe?
Go girl! That's the spirit!
Did they fondle your boo-bies?
Amethyst Realm, who, in a saner age would be locked up onthe strength of her name alone, is crazier than an outhouse rat.
I don’t think that is her real photo that you put there.
After mulling this over I have tried to put things in an optimistic perspective.
1. She’s more harmless than most cray-crays and ghost-lovin’ is much safer and cleaner than joining the LGBTCQ community. Better for society and the neighborhood.
2. Her real photo looked fine and she is getting tons of publicity. Maybe it’s just a silly stunt to attract a real live blooded hetero-male since she’s close to 30YO and wants to have kids.
Ghost pictures please.
“She married the ghost of an 18th-century pirate.”
Of course she did. The ladies are always marrying the ghosts of pirates, princes, and adventurers.
You never hear: “I married the ghost of a 19th century bookkeeper’s assistant”.
Shes only attracted to his body. Oh wait...
He should just say, "Bada book bada boom".
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