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I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me?
The New York Times ^ | 07/05/18 | Glynnis MacNicol

Posted on 07/10/2018 12:17:25 PM PDT by Simon Green

A few months before my 42nd birthday, I was out to dinner with friends and found myself seated next to a well-known older male writer.

I happened to be in the final stages of finishing a proposal for a memoir about being a single woman over 40 without children, and was inwardly marveling at the timing of our encounter. I was a fan of his. Perhaps he might offer some wisdom? Words of encouragement?

As drinks were delivered I sketched the outline of the story: No one had prepared me for how exhilarating life could be on my own. I was traveling all the time, doing what I wanted, when I wanted, released from the fear of the clock that had dogged me through my 30s. Conversely, no one had warned me of the ways in which it would actually be difficult; my mother had been very ill, for instance, and part of the book was about caring for her.

No sooner had I finished than the famous writer placed his glass firmly on the white tablecloth, leaned back and declared: “Glynnis MacNicol, you have a terrible life!”

Not exactly the feedback I was hoping for.

He continued: “You’re all alone in the world, and have no one to help you.” He turned to my friends, dramatically interrupting their conversation. “Do you know how terrible this woman’s life is? She’s all by herself!”

My friends managed to snort back their drinks, barely. “But I’m fine,” I protested lightheartedly, hoping to return the discussion to writing. “I’m quite enjoying myself.”

He took a disbelieving sip of his drink. “I want to help you,” he said. He then instructed our server to wrap up his untouched steak and insisted I take it home.

(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: allaboutme; genderwars; lookatme; mememememe; sadoldlady; trends
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To: Simon Green
Glynnis,

Congratulation for a great PR idea to sell your upcoming novel about a woman in your situation. Tons of women will buy this best seller!

RWA

41 posted on 07/10/2018 12:33:52 PM PDT by Right Wing Assault ('Kill'-google,TWITR,FACEBK,WaPo,Hollywd,CNN,NFL,BLM,CAIR,Antifa,SPLC,ESPN,NPR,NBA)
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Comment #42 Removed by Moderator

To: Simon Green

Am I supposed to believe anything in the NYT? It’d be the first time.


43 posted on 07/10/2018 12:36:04 PM PDT by WKUHilltopper
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To: ExpatCanuck

LOL.


44 posted on 07/10/2018 12:36:36 PM PDT by SIDENET
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To: Simon Green

It’s easy to be alone when you are young. She isn’t thinking past her next year, if that.
The day is coming when she will need someone to drive her home after a hospital stay of some sort.
She has yet to realize selfishness has a price. A high one.


45 posted on 07/10/2018 12:36:50 PM PDT by Wiser now (Socialism does not eliminate poverty, it guarantees it.)
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To: Simon Green

She is an involuntary single.


46 posted on 07/10/2018 12:36:58 PM PDT by deadrock
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To: BenLurkin

That there is “Lipstick on a pig”!

8>)


47 posted on 07/10/2018 12:37:04 PM PDT by Autonomous User (During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.)
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To: Simon Green
The author appears to be running hard on what some call the rationalization hamster wheel. She's so content with her choices that she has to reassure herself endlessly about how great they are.

There's a whole genre of this stuff. The supposed rationale for writing these screeds is always that other people constantly question the author's decision to remain single and/or childless, and she needs to set them straight. So, they tell the world about their amazing, worldly, free-as-a-bird lives. The fact that they think anybody wants to read this crap shows their narcissism, and probably explains why they're alone. Eat, Pray, Love, spin that wheel.

48 posted on 07/10/2018 12:37:16 PM PDT by jumpingcholla34
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To: Autonomous User

I don’t think even Laz would hit that


49 posted on 07/10/2018 12:38:15 PM PDT by DariusBane (Liberty and Risk. Flip sides of the same coin. So how much risk will YOU accept? Vive Deo et Vives)
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To: Simon Green

I believe him.

Some people are just not meant to be parents of a child and thankfully they realize this. Many more do not and the children suffer because of it.

I was not blessed with children but (I think) I make a much better uncle.


50 posted on 07/10/2018 12:39:05 PM PDT by RedMonqey ("Those who turn their arms in for plowshares will be doing the plowing for those who didnÂ’t.")
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To: Governor Dinwiddie

In your 40s, you still have enough distractions in your life not to miss not having kids.

In your 60s and beyond......not so much.


51 posted on 07/10/2018 12:39:09 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: Interesting Times

That’s ok. They’re importing all of Central America to perpetuate their ideology.


52 posted on 07/10/2018 12:39:13 PM PDT by MountainWalker
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To: Mears

She can’t write either!


53 posted on 07/10/2018 12:41:55 PM PDT by Autonomous User (During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.)
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To: Simon Green

Biytch, are you really happy? Then why are writing a proposal for a memoir about being a single woman over 40 without children?
You wouldn’t be a good mother anyway.


54 posted on 07/10/2018 12:42:36 PM PDT by I want the USA back (Liberalism, like insanity, is the denial of reality.)
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To: apillar

We have no crumb crunchers but a couple of nieces and a nephew.

Neither of us are parental material.


55 posted on 07/10/2018 12:42:50 PM PDT by wally_bert (Just call me Angelo or babe.)
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To: ClearCase_guy

I agree. In fact I would put it - I know people who should NOT have kids.


56 posted on 07/10/2018 12:43:08 PM PDT by BBQToadRibs
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To: Simon Green

Wait until you’re in your 70s. You’ll still be child free. But you’ll also likely be friend-free, lonely and likely a source of worry for those few more distant relations who you remain in touch with. At least that’s what has happened to nearly all of the kid-free Boomers I know. Aging is miserable without the joy of children and grandchildren.


57 posted on 07/10/2018 12:45:43 PM PDT by Antoninus ("In Washington, swamp drain you.")
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To: BBQToadRibs

Run into quite a few that had 0 business with kids.

My best friends succeeded in adopting a fine baby boy a few years ago. That kid won the powerball in terms of loving parents.


58 posted on 07/10/2018 12:45:50 PM PDT by wally_bert (Just call me Angelo or babe.)
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To: Simon Green
For males, on one end of the scale, we have the incel - involuntary celibate.

For females, and on the other end of the scale, we have the insol - involuntary solitude.

59 posted on 07/10/2018 12:45:53 PM PDT by deadrock
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To: txrefugee
Wait until you are 70 or 80 in failing health, and then write the final chapter.

Unfortunately, there are many in such a state, and they DO have kids, but those kids are... not helping.

60 posted on 07/10/2018 12:47:39 PM PDT by A_perfect_lady
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