Stop telling your co-workers to ‘think outside the box’

New York Post ^ | April 25, 2018 | SWNS

[sparklite2]

Top 40 most cringe-worthy phrases used at the office

1. Give 110 percent
2. Think outside the box
3. Hammer it out
4. Heavy lifting
5. Throw them under the bus
6. Don’t count your chickens before they’ve hatched
7. Pushing the envelope
8. Let the cat out of the bag
9. Let’s circle back
10. Win-win situation
11. Blue-sky thinking
12. Boil the ocean
13. Synergy
14. Low-hanging fruit
15. Take it to the next level
16. Barking up the wrong tree
17. Going forward
18. Let’s ballpark this
19. Run this up the flagpole
20. Back to square one
21. There’s no I in team
22. Back to the drawing board
23. Paradigm shift
24. Elephant in the room
25. Raise the bar
26. Drill down
27. Best thing since sliced bread
28. Deep dive
29. Skin in the game
30. Reach out
31. Touch base
32. Play hardball
33. Don’t reinvent the wheel
34. Kept in the loop
35. The bottom line
36. Down the road
37. I’ll loop you in
38. Hit the nail on the head
39. ASAP
40. Team player

[jmacusa]

“If everyone is thinking the same thing no one is thinking.’’- General George Patton.

[John Milner]

I had a former boss who started saying, “Perception is reality.” Meaning whatever anybody told him was wrong with my department was truly wrong.

After about 20 of these meetings, always starting with, “Perception is reality.” I interrupted with, “Well every time I hear you say perception is reality I perceive you to be an idiot... Well, I’ll be damned, that really IS true!”

And got up and left the meeting.

I never heard that phrase spew out of his mouth again.

[Rembrandt]

“The one that makes me twitchy is the filler word “really.””

Don’t forget Hilarious’ favorite - “y’know,” which she uses roughly 3 X per two sentences.

[wgmalabama]

Whatever. Hate speach all over this. Don’t tell me hoe to communicate with the morons I work with. It’s irrelevant that I work alone. They are morons. ;)

[Oatka]

"Boil the ocean"

During WWI the government asked for suggestions on how to get rid of the U-Boats. Basically, that was what Will Rogers suggested: "Boil the Atlantic". Back then the government must have had a sense of humor for they asked just how he would do that. He told them he just came up with ideas and let other people figure out how to implement them.

[alternatives?]

You said former boss.

Were you fired?

[Big Red Badger]

I’ve got some Problems
With You People!

I use that one.

[The Antiyuppie]

The jargon is so thick where I work that it has devolved into some type of language similar to what twins raised by wolves might have. Any idea or system that cannot be expressed in a Powerpoint is de facto too complex.

New phrases/words/acronyms trickle down from management, who learn them by reading the newest business books and then use them to demonstrate that they are “up on things”. By the time you hear the guys cleaning the toilets using them, they become obsolete.

[cld51860]

Now it’s “let’s look at this from 30,000 feet.” Sick of my boss saying that.

[alexander_busek]

Some more cringeworthy ones:

"My last territorial claim in Central Europe..."

"No one... intends to build a wall..."

"Never fight a land-war in Asia..."

Regards,

[grey_whiskers]

There’s no I in team

I always quickly respond,

There is no team without "M" and "E".

What does that leave, besides ME?

T & A!!!

/pun for the WIN!>

[grey_whiskers]

I have always loathed, with every cell of my being, the catch-all phrase
"...from a _____ perspective"

as well as (one usually hears this from some dimwit at HR while filling out forms)
"Perfect."

[grey_whiskers]

Name one scientific/engineering example that was devised by a consensus.

Windows Vista?

[grey_whiskers]

Here’s a typical random buzzphrase: functional facilities support

Which has the robust, comforting, and completely appropriate abbreviation "FFS".

[FreedomPoster]

LOL! I didn’t notice that! And yes, I get the more common interpretation of that.

[sparklite2]

While the list includes the telephone company commercial inspired ‘reach out,’ it misses the equally faux intimate fraud of ‘something to share with you.’

[sparklite2]

That’s very clever.

[Enterprise]

My view was that people who couldn’t think outside the box were the ones who got promoted.

[sparklite2]

Speaking of the latest phrases to not yet be made into cliches, may I present...

Net out to ‘no.’

What that means is to put the advantages of an idea in a column next to a column of negative consequences. Similar to a financial balance sheet, whatever remains after each pro cancels out its corresponding con must be a net ‘yes’ to proceed, but fails if it nets out to ‘no.’

[Enterprise]

True - bump!