Posted on 01/23/2018 10:42:36 AM PST by sodpoodle
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Two Muslims have crashed a speedboat into the Thames barrier in London. Police think it might be the start of Ram-a-dam. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Riots in Birmingham last month caused over 1 million worth of improvements. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Muslims have gone on the rampage in Manchester, killing anyone who's English. Police fear the death toll could be as high as 8 or 9. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Years ago it was suggested that: "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". But, since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works great ! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque. They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
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During last night's high winds, an immigrant family was killed by a falling tree. A spokesman for the Birmingham City council said: "We didn't even know they were living up there". ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Minorities in the UK have complained that there are not enough television shows with minorities in mind, so Crime Watch is being shown 5 times a week now. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed. How could anyone stoop so low? ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony, shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him: "What's up Abdul, won't it start?" ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
An Emergency Call Center worker has been fired in Toronto much to the dismay of her colleagues, who were unhappy with her dismissal. It seems that a caller dialed 911 from a cell phone stating: "I am depressed and lying on a railway line so when the train comes I can finally meet Allah". To which the call center employee replied: "Remain calm and stay on the line".
He offered his honor,
She honored his offer,
And all night long it was honor and offer...
“Don’t mention the war!”
Glad these and Blazing Saddles are on DVD...
Yeah, like that wasn’t staged.
Probably along the lines of some disparaging message was again Lord Higanbotham was written in yellow snow, upon seeing it he demanded a investigation.
Scotland Yard did the analysis finding the urine was from his major political opponent, Lord H said “I can live with that”. To which the investigator replied:
“But it was in Lady Higanbotham’s handwriting!”
And very nicely staged at that!
Boy did you butcher that one.
With all due respect, I think I am going to keep on forgetting. But thanks for your keen observation.
From memory. First time I heard it was in the early 70s, Carson probably. Haven’t heard it since.
Ping!
"You obviously aren't spending enough time on the '18 elections. Just a joke! We have a lot of weapons. We can totally upset political history in these mid-term elections."
I'm sorry, I should have inserted another break, between my poor joke and "We have a lot of weapons."
Mid term elections are, most times, elections that cause losses to the winning party in the last presidential election. If the GOP can keep the pressure on, they may be able to keep moving ahead! That's my hope, but we have to start now!
No worries. Just remember for next time, that only women can “offer their honor”. At least when that joke was created. Now young people wouldn’t understand what the phrase means. So, the only way the joke works is if it starts, “she offered her honor”. Then, the rest falls naturally into place.
Loved the old stuff as one could make fun of ones self and others. Today humor has gone to PC
Another show was called Faulty Towers.
It was about a landlord who rents a room out to a few tenants including a black guy.
Today shows like that would never be made.
I loved Fawlty Towers — it was hilarious. I read last year that the guy who played the Spanish waiter had died in his early 80s.
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