Posted on 05/09/2017 1:12:47 PM PDT by nickcarraway
What does the typical Billy Joel fan look like? It’s a serious question. We can, I think to at least a small degree of accuracy, guess what the typical Sex Pistols fan looked like back in their heyday, or the typical Spice Girls fan in theirs. But, what about Billy Joel? His music is so nondescript, so family-restaurant friendly, so bland, so cheesy, that its lack of concrete identity aside from its popularity and its blandness makes it difficult to imagine just who buys his albums, just who packs the sold out arenas.
Let’s think about it this way perhaps – Billy Joel is the suburbs of music. The term “ugly” is so often misapplied to the suburbs (some, at least). I say misapplied, because the suburbs, as I’ve lived them, are not positively ugly, like, say, Jean Dubuffet’s “Art Brut,” but rather they have a sort of negative ugliness, which is to say, they lack any qualities whatsoever. The “ugliness” of the suburbs is in reality nothing more than the banality, the boringness of the suburbs. As opposed to brutalism, which can often be ugly, but in a positive, fascinating sense, if the suburbs are oppressive, it is only because there is nothing to latch on to, nothing interesting. This seems to me the best description, by way of analogy, of Billy Joel’s music – negatively terrible. This, again, does not bring us any closer to visualizing the typical Billy Joel superfan, but it at least let’s us theorize about why we can’t.
In any event, the occasion for these thoughts is, of course, Joel’s birthday. The man seems, like the suburbs, timeless – he’s still around, still making music, still selling out shows. Long after we’re gone – cockroaches, Joel, office buildings, and, probably, (I shudder at the thought) The Eagles. But my hatred for Joel’s music doesn’t run as deep as some. Despite his eternal dullness, he does have some okay songs. No, if you want some real, wonderful, joyous vitriol, look no further than Ron Rosenbaum’s 2009 article for Slate, “The Worst Pop Singer Ever.” Rosenbaum is the author of books like “Explaining Hitler” and “How the End Begins: The Road to a Nuclear World War III,” so when he writes about Joel’s music, well, he knows what he’s talking about. The article is one of those perennial internet gems, the epitome of “evergreen content” – so long as Joel is around (forever), this article will be necessary. But enough from me – Happy birthday Billy, and here’s Rosenbaum.
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It is weird: “Hey, its Billy’s birthday...I’m going out of my way to trash him.”
You can think that. I have thought that. But when somebody comes out and says it, it sounds too definitive and too extreme.
It's like saying Malin Akerman is the worst actress ever. There are a lot of wannabees out there who never get to the level Billy or Malin have achieved.
So yeah, Uptown Girl has to be one of the sappiest songs ever (and a lousy video with crappy choreography), but New York State of Mind is sort of a classic or a standard for the city.
Rosenbaum's argument is more than a little strange. He has utter contempt for Billy Joel and he sees contempt in all of Joel's songs: contempt for "losers" and "little people."
I don't see that in the songs at all, and I don't think Rosenbaum can have it both ways -- putting Billy down as a loser and crummy entertainer and attributing contempt for losers and crummy entertainers to Billy Joel.
I think Billy sees himself as very similar to the people he things about and any contempt is all Ron Rosenbaum's.
At every concert he olays Goodnight Saigonand has NamVets join him on the stage. He is a very skilled writer both of music and lyrics. While a lib, he mostly keeps it to himself and he has none of the phony baloney man of the people that Springsteen boasts. And it helps if you are from Long Island
Then he bagged Christy Brinkley. This caused a lot of confusion because no blue collar New York guy could bag Christy Brinkley. As a result of his bagging Christy Brinkley, his music turned to junk. It was all sugary love songs to Christy Brinkley. He couldn't stop thinking about bagging Christy Brinkley even after he bagged her.
But if you're going to toss away your talent, there are worse ways than bagging Christy Brinkley.
That's why music is such a universal medium- there's a lot for people to like, or not. And one's particular taste doesn't make anyone elses taste right or wrong.
Regarding Billy Joel, I'm not much of a fan of his pop songs, but the long, story songs are pretty interesting. And I think Captain Jack is one of those songs that I enjoy every time I hear it.
One more thing, a guy that can attract Christie Brinkley enough to get her to marry him has just a little bit of mojo going on.
The Eagles are totally a country band. And the big difference between them and the Monkees is the Monkees actually made a couple of good albums.
I heard a few of his songs when I was little (and I believe they were ancient then) and they were catchy. “Always A Woman” and “Keeping The Faith.” I’d say he was “rock revival” in style, and tried to bring back early rock (which was what my folks preferred).
Certainly I’ve heard worse. We had three volumes of Simon and Garfunkel that seemed pretentious and vapid to me, with few exceptions. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a Springsteen song. Rod Stewart? Only “Rhythm of My Heart” appeals to me.
Best pop music era was the fifties, without a doubt...I’m always finding something beautiful from that time on youtube.
Well, thank your for that. I now know that I can completely disregard anything you have to say about music.
I love Billy Joel’s music.
Even if I didn’t think the Eagles are one of the most painfully boring bands in history I’d have poked that post, because it’s a pathetic display of misplaced ego that desperately needs popping. Don’t take it so personally. Unless you’re Don Henley. In which case please do take it VERY personally, so personally you are unable to ever write a crappy, sappy, texas-two step hunk of soft rock crap again.
Love the last two. :)
Yeah, but he, well, you know, had relations with Christie Brinkley.
She could be in my music videos anytime.
I kindly refer you back to #68. Have a lovely day.
Joel had some of his boats built in Southwest Harbor, Maine; and he could be seen around town quite often. My wife and I were dining with a friend from upstate New York when Joel was seated at the table next to us. I thought my friend was going to pee her pants...several times.
BWAHAHAHAHA
Dude, you are so far into high school 12 year-old territory. Grow up. So somebody thinks your favorite bands sucks, GET OVER IT.
In post #64, your point well made!
Bruce is so UN talented its unbelievable. Billy’s piano solo in Angry Young Man is great!
Good ol Mojo.
Proof of how bad the Eagles are is in any cover of Hotel California. Because every single cover of that song ever made, even the Spanish version on the Big Lobowski soundtrack is better. Turns out they actually wrote a good song there, they just can’t perform it.
Of course part of my hatred for the Eagles is I love Joe Walsh. And every time the Eagles get back together that’s another year without Joe Walsh album.
You're funny, kid.
Here: Enjoy your Monkees
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