Posted on 09/07/2016 11:25:09 AM PDT by Gamecock
A 70-year-old man charged with robbing a Kansas City, Kan., bank said he did it because he preferred a jail cell over living with his wife.
Lawrence John Ripple is charged in federal court with the Friday afternoon robbery of the Bank of Labor at 756 Minnesota Ave.
According to court documents, Ripple handed a teller a note that read, “I have a gun, give me money.”
The teller complied.
But instead of fleeing, Ripple took the money and then took a seat in the bank lobby, according to the documents.
When a bank security guard approached him, Ripple told the guard, “I’m the guy you’re looking for.”
The guard took the money from Ripple and held him until police arrived, which wasn’t long, because Kansas City, Kan., police headquarters is on the same block.
When he was questioned later by investigators, Ripple told him that he and his wife had argued and he “no longer wanted to be in that situation,” according to the documents.
“Ripple wrote out his demand note in front of his wife … and told her he’d rather be in jail than at home,” an FBI agent wrote in the affidavit filed in support of the robbery charge.
There’s another charge that I learned about many years ago for where people take things and then bring them back with no intent of keeping them.... it’s usually a lesser included charge for auto theft. Could possibly charge him with that i’d guess, but I agree with everyone’s thoughts that the judge should sentence him to probation or house arrest or something similar.
“And for the life of me, I don’t get why more men don’t insist on one.”
If I didn’t think she was worth half my stuff I would not have married her. And anyway, all the pre-nup I need is ‘till death do you part’.
My 70th is in 4 months. I mentioned this to my wife. She said I can turn my self in now for assault with a dead weapon.
Old joke...This guy robs a bank, is caught and goes to prison, but they never find the money. One day he gets a letter from his wife telling him that things are very hard and they barley have money for food. She says she is going to dig up the back yard and plant vegetables.
He writes he back and tells her “whatever you do don’t dig up the back yard”.
A few days later he get another letter from her, “The strangest thing happened yesterday. About 20 cops showed up and spent the whole day digging up the entire back yard, but they didn’t find anything.”
He writes her back, “OK, now plant your vegetables.”
He was spry and virile in his youth, just like ‘ol Slick Willie. Look at what the Cankle has done to him over time.
Females like that just suck the life right out of a guy.
Yep.
Heh. New to me.
” Nothing uglier than a ninety year old white woman!”
Redd Foxx
Desperate men take desperate measures. They don’t have to always make sense.
He probably did not even have a gun
“They marry, stay about 10 years then divorce. One woman has made a living doing it - and I cannot figure out why men still marry her.”
I have 2 guesses. Maybe 3...
“And for the life of me, I don’t get why more men don’t insist on one.”
Same answer as above
In that case he could probably be charged with submitting a fraudulent withdrawal slip.
American males live only about thirty years; however, they live a lot longer in captivity.
Ideally that would be the case, but there are a lot of gold-diggers, esp when the farm is worth millions. Our hired hand tried to get me to marry him for years, even after I was engaged to my husband. Even then, I knew it wasn’t me he wanted, but the farm. My husband, OTOH, has during the course of our marriage, signed away any rights at various times as needed (quit claim or release of homestead) with no issue. He doesn’t WANT anything in his name, even after I have offered to give him or add his name to things (even the car). He married me, not my money.
Bundy’s wife was hot and he was too stupid to know it.
Sounds like an episode of “Barney Miller.”
She will knock over a bank, say she’s a dude, and become his cellmate.
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