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Obama Bans Wealthy From Hoarding Gold
SkinnyReporter ^ | by Justin Thyme

Posted on 01/15/2016 8:14:23 AM PST by Lazamataz

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Barack Obama today banned private ownership of more than a quarter ounce of gold, saying the move was necessary to revive the economy.

"Wealthy Americans are bailing out on the economy by taking their money out of circulation and hoarding gold," Obama said as he signed an executive order reminiscent of Depression-era President Franklin D. Roosevelt's ban on the possession of gold.

"The wealthy are violating their trust and abusing their position by investing in gold," Obama said. "My order will put an immediate end to this practice, which threatens to hijack the good efforts of Congress and my administration, which needs at least 3 trillion dollars of additional stimulus money to maintain an acceptable rate of growth of the federal government. My motto is 'If you're not getting bigger, you're not getting better.'"

Obama made the announcement at a dais set up in the White House Rose Garden and immediately left without taking questions, his customary practice in his ongoing effort to eliminate transparency in government.

(Excerpt) Read more at skinnyreporter.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Humor; Weird Stuff
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To: Lazamataz

Laz, you of all should know that, these days, satire is indistinguishable from current politics.
I love a good satire, but have given up on it because every bit of satire I’ve seen for the last decade isn’t as satirical as the reality it satirizes.


41 posted on 01/15/2016 8:40:27 AM PST by ctdonath2 (History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the week or the timid. - Ike)
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To: Hulka

I never read stuff with satire in the title because the reall stuff is more ironic and sadder.


42 posted on 01/15/2016 8:42:43 AM PST by bjorn14 (Woe to those who call good evil and evil good. Isaiah 5:20)
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To: Lazamataz

You Will wear the puffy Shirt!

But I don’t want to be a Pirate!


43 posted on 01/15/2016 8:45:36 AM PST by Big Red Badger (UNSCANABLE in an IDIOCRACY!)
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To: bjorn14

Ditto. When reality parodies itself, satire is dead.


44 posted on 01/15/2016 8:49:29 AM PST by ctdonath2 (History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the week or the timid. - Ike)
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To: Lazamataz

Obama would be far more likely to outlaw “hoarding” lead and brass.


45 posted on 01/15/2016 8:51:03 AM PST by KarlInOhio (CNBC = Clowns Neutered By Cruz)
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To: ctdonath2

“Truth is always stranger than fiction”


46 posted on 01/15/2016 8:53:11 AM PST by elcid1970 ("The Second Amendment is more important than Islam.")
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To: Lazamataz

He’s too late! LOL.


47 posted on 01/15/2016 8:56:39 AM PST by b4its2late (A Liberal is a person who will give away everything he doesn't own.)
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To: b4its2late

Not too late for a keyword, tho!


48 posted on 01/15/2016 8:59:48 AM PST by Lazamataz (If the Oregon occupiers are occupying a National Wildlife REFUGE, are they not now REFUGEES?)
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To: Lazamataz

I wonder.........what’s the record for keywords ?


49 posted on 01/15/2016 9:02:13 AM PST by onona (Blind Faith - originally released in 1969 on Polydor Records)
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To: onona

I’m hoping to find out. Cuss me out in the keywords! :)


50 posted on 01/15/2016 9:02:50 AM PST by Lazamataz (If the Oregon occupiers are occupying a National Wildlife REFUGE, are they not now REFUGEES?)
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To: Lazamataz

So long as he doesn’t confiscate the CHEESE I am good to go.


51 posted on 01/15/2016 9:12:08 AM PST by Gadsden1st
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To: Lazamataz

Oh I already did :)


52 posted on 01/15/2016 9:15:22 AM PST by onona (Blind Faith - originally released in 1969 on Polydor Records)
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To: Gadsden1st

He won’t confiscate MOOSE, because they might bite his SISTER.


53 posted on 01/15/2016 9:16:40 AM PST by Lazamataz (If the Oregon occupiers are occupying a National Wildlife REFUGE, are they not now REFUGEES?)
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To: Lazamataz

Don’t give that dog-turd any ideas.


54 posted on 01/15/2016 9:20:09 AM PST by NorthMountain ("The time has come", the Walrus said, "to talk of many things")
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To: Lazamataz

If he confiscates this:

http://nowiknow.com/this-cheese-stands-alone/

I hit the barricades.


55 posted on 01/15/2016 9:23:22 AM PST by Gadsden1st
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To: Lazamataz

Naw, it’s a dumb thing. Please don’t conflate the two.


56 posted on 01/15/2016 10:02:45 AM PST by Gunslingr3
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To: Gunslingr3

Have you ever really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like? Has anyone?


57 posted on 01/15/2016 10:06:55 AM PST by Lazamataz (If the Oregon occupiers are occupying a National Wildlife REFUGE, are they not now REFUGEES?)
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To: Lazamataz

Somebody better holla holla at all the brothas chillin’ down on Martin Luther King Blvd and Main. All them is wearin’ more gold than that y’all.


58 posted on 01/15/2016 10:42:54 AM PST by Mathews (Ecclesiastes 10:2 (NIV), Luke 22:36 (NIV))
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To: Lazamataz

Needs more keywords.


59 posted on 01/15/2016 10:50:55 AM PST by Idaho_Cowboy (Ride for the Brand. Joshua 24:15)
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To: Idaho_Cowboy

You are right! So help me out! :)

More cowbell!


60 posted on 01/15/2016 11:14:49 AM PST by Lazamataz (If the Oregon occupiers are occupying a National Wildlife REFUGE, are they not now REFUGEES?)
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