That’s pretty funny, but it’s still just a waste of my time.
I just skip right to *CLICK*.
It works every time and is equally satisfying.
I have laid the phone down and let them or their recording talk to the phone table. Twice I have locked their system up for over half an hour till I finally hung up.
I have had a number of comebacks for these telemarketers
A high pressure sales pitch for BRAWNDO! THE THIRST MUTILATOR (c).
Dakota County Sheriffs Department
Prairie Island Power Plant
And now for the telemarketers pitching small business financing, I tell them that I am in the imported olive oil business, with other services as well. I try to sound like I’m from Bay Ridge or Bensonhurst. Capiche?
A typical scam caller might claim to be from Microsoft, and say they have reports that your computer is infected. For perhaps $200 the scammer will say he'll remotely clean your computer for you. Or the scammer might claim to be from the IRS, and say you owe the IRS money, but you'll get a discount if you pay now, over the phone.
I read a report out of the UK that said something like 1 in 5 people who get these calls fall for it.
That old lady was so good on the phone, that company should hire her. You notice how the price kept going up, up, up, with each minor change? She kept going back to requesting that credit card number. “I’ve got my pen all ready to write it down. I’m just waiting for you!”
I have a yellow stickie with a phone number attached to my ‘puter. When I get a robo call to press 1, then all operators are busy please leave a message, I give them the name/number of the local FBI special agent in charge.
There’s this guy from India that I hire sometimes. He works for just one dollar an hour! I remember I once had some appointment setter from India calling me to set up an appointment with me and his American boss. Finally I excepted, but I had it set up that he would have to talk to my Indian on the phone instead of me!
I got tired of a guy calling from India saying he’s from Microsoft and they’ve been alerted that there’s a virus on my computer. (In the end, they want my credit card number to fix the nonexistent problem.)
He asks if I’m at my computer.
Me: Yes. (I’m not.)
Him: Do you see the colored ball on the left of the screen?
Me: Yes.
He tells me to type certain things in different places, and I tell him, “OK. I did it” every time. (I didn’t.)
After about five minutes of playing him like this...
Him: “No what do you see?”
Me: “Hmmm... I see the Virgin Mary.”
Him: “You see the Werjun Mary?”
Me: Yes.
He hangs up.
The companies that call you are scum. The people who call you are making $9.75/hr, making 300-500 calls per shift, trying to feed their babies while staying off welfare. I say “no” politely and hang up.
I just copied that in to my WORD. LOL
We never answer our phone until the call goes thru the answering machine. Unless it’s someone we want to talk to it NEVER gets answered. Usually the PITAs just hang up when they hear the machine message... (After all, it’s how they call us.)
Love it!
Someone stole my shtick.
Ring, ring!
Me: Hello?
Them: Hello, sir, blah, blah, blah...
Me: That's fine, but may I have your credit card number, please?
Them: why do you need my credit card number?
Me: I make my living on the telephone and right now you're taking me away from my livelihood , so if you want to keep talking to me, I'm going to have to bill you and I charge $350 per hour. May I have your credit card number?
Them: CLICK!
I simply don’t pick up the phone unless I recognize the number on caller ID.
I tell them to call me back on another number, which just happens to be a consumer fraud hotline.
A few years ago when a salesman tried to sell us some steaks because he was in our area. My husband told them we didn't eat beef, we ate dog. In fact, he said we raise dogs for meat and he tried to sell the salesman some dog meat. It went on for a while and it was hilarious.
Don't mess with old people when we are bored!
A few years back, had some Indian guy call looking for Mr Kitty. When I said he wasn’t home, the guy says “Oh, is this his wife?”
And I replied “No, I just f**k him.”
I heard the guy just gasp, and go “WHAT???!!” THen he hung up.
Other time, when I was asked if I was his wife I’e said “No, I’m his girlfriend, but please don’t tell his wife if she answers next time.”
Would this work for US Pharmacy? Ever since Sweet Hubby ordered pills from them we have been flooded with 3-6 calls a day. Nothing seems block the calls because they constantly change their phone numbers.