It's too easy to steal an Apple Watch

CNN Money ^ | 05/14/2015

[dennisw]

This watch is a flop except among gadget crazed East Asians

[Swordmaker]

So bad were they that some companies took to gluing non-functional jewels (synthetic rubies, mostly) to useless places (like on the rotor) just to hike up the jewel count :)

When I was growing up, there was an older than God Swiss Watchmaker at the end of our block. . . he looked just like you would expect a Swiss Watchmaker would look like, fringe of white hair, apple cheeks, and a little smile, but somehow he missed the lederhosen. He said that there were really only 19 bearing points on a standard watch that really needed a jewel. Everything else would be superfluous. If you added complications, then you might need a few more. . . but never as many as you might think.

[Swordmaker]

Calling the Appleistas....

Thanks for the heads up, Neidermeyer.

[Swordmaker]

While still maintaining that "it's not really a watch".

It isn't. The Apple Watch is a miniature computer on your wrist where the watch application is just one app among many. . . just as the iPhone is a complete miniature computer that also happens to make phone calls.

A true wrist watch merely tells various forms of time, including those that show phases of the moon, have a day and date feature, or help you calculate speed as a function of time over a measured distance.

[Swordmaker]

This watch is a flop except among gadget crazed East Asians

Our resident Apple Thread serial liar pipes up with another episode of his recurring themed lie. . .

[tacticalogic]

It isn't. The Apple Watch is a miniature computer on your wrist

That's the standard line when someone compares it to a conventional watch.

Now, someone questions why it doesn't have features normally found on other mobile computing devices, it's suddenly not fair that they aren't asking the same questions about conventional watches.

[dennisw]

Its a clunker. In six months anyone wearing an Apple watch will be laughed at like they are wearing a propeller beanie

[onyx]

Very Much for our FReepathon message,
dearest Swordmaker!

B T T T ! ! ! ©

[Swordmaker]

Now, someone questions why it doesn't have features normally found on other mobile computing devices, it's suddenly not fair that they aren't asking the same questions about conventional watches.

Now, tacticalogic, just who is it that is asking that question about their Timex™ watch?

[tacticalogic]

Now, tacticalogic, just who is it that is asking that question about their Timex™ watch?

I didn't think we had permission to ask about those:

Of course, one should be asking what protection do Rolex and Patek Philippe watches have from being stolen?

[Swordmaker]

Its a clunker. In six months anyone wearing an Apple watch will be laughed at like they are wearing a propeller beanie

Except for you, who always wears a propeller beanie. . . except for when you are wearing your dress deellie-boppers.

DennisW's favorite set of dress Deelie-boppers

Then of course, there's your standard default daily cap:

DennisW's Every Day going to Freep Apple Threads Hat

[ReignOfError]

These days, Americans have to plan on, and make accommodations for, thieves.

These days? Americans?

The earliest lock was found in the ruins of Nineveh and is estimated to be 4,000 years old.

[dayglored]

Oh, man, Dennis! Those are some awesome deelie-boppers! DANG!

Hey Swordmaker, if I want a set, do I have to trash Apple, or can I just sorta hang out with Dennis for a while and maybe he'll lend them to me?

Per the second pic, I already have a tin-foil hat (actually, it's an "Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie"), don't need another, as I only have one head.

[ReignOfError]

“You obviously don’t know how big Manny Pacquiao is across Asia. Billions of Asians are going buy HP’s TouchPad due to him. Apple will lose 98% of their Asian sales. HP is in very very close cooperation with the Taiwanese geniuses producing a superior product. They have torn part hundreds of iPads and know what makes them tick. They know how to make it all work better and the result is the HP TouchPad

The HP TouchPad is something like the iPad v. 6.0”

— dennisw, July 15, 2011

[Ditter]

Yes I think these days are worst than the old days. When I was growing up in Houston in the 40’s we never locked our house or cars. I remember when we were going on a 2 week vacation, my mother and dad searching the house looking for the front door key so they could lock it. My father was a welder and had a shop full of tools that were never locked up and nothing was ever stolen.

[dayglored]

Dennis has been predicting the failure of Apple and every Apple product with such dogged, determined consistency over the years, that I think he truly has earned some sort of award and recognition.

We who are regaled by his tales of "Imminent Apple Collapse" (IAC) (that's my description, not his, but you get the idea) really should stand in appreciation of such forthright single-mindedness.

I'm going to put on my Thinking Cap (which looks surprisingly like an Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie) and try to come up with something that will go nicely with the Deelie-Boppers.

[dayglored]

Hi Dennis,

I do trust you are taking our light-hearted kidding in the FRiendly and appreciative way in which it is offered. :-)

(In all seriousness, if you are in any way hurt or offended by my joking around, please say so and I'll back it off.)

But I prefer to think you'll instead rise to the challenge and give as good as you get.

[dennisw]

Those deelie boppers///never seen these before.....
look as gay as the crappy Apple watch

You wouldn’t catch me dead or alive wearing an Apple watch. Once the Asians stop buying it Apple will go down the tubes. Thank God!!! We will be rid of this annoying company

[dennisw]

Sword needs a group hug but count me out

[Swordmaker]

Hey, Dayglored, nope, no bashing Apple required. But DennisW does seem to have two heads, so he’d probably let you try-on his deelie-boppers while he’s wearing his propeller beanie and his tin-foil hat. . . but you gotta catch him in a good mood while he’s posting a lie on an Apple thread. He doesn’t wear a deelie-bopper for those events. They are too close to the truth about him. . .