Lost Dad in 06 and then Mom in 07 and Sweetheart of my life in 2011. I found him on the floor not breathing. Called 911. He was not cold or stiff, I actually thought he was warm, so 911 had me try to save him. They wanted to know the address. Mind went blank and I ran quarter mile to the mailbox to read the address off the mailbox. In retrospect I could have read it off the bills sitting on the table. You will just never know what you will do until it happens.
The paramedics got there in 20 minutes and said he had been dead for 3 hours.
Coping is a personal thing. Do what you need to do. I still wear his T-shirts and his cologne. The rest of the world doesn't think I'm doing all that well, but I am happy doing that.
BK,
I lost my wife - literally the “girl-next-door” - when she was 28 to breast cancer. That was many, many moons ago and she remains in my thoughts every day.
We don’t understand why some things happen in life but we must trust in God and His perfect wisdom.
I can only offer my heartfelt condolences but please know you had a long time together and those memories will always be in your heart.
Time does help ease the hurt as well as knowing he would want you to rejoice in the time you had together.
God bless....
Prayers for you.
I’m a 51 year old, “only child”. I got used to being alone. Then, I got married and suddenly (and surprisingly) felt loneliness the first few times my wife went away for short trips. I hated it so much that I prayed to God to help those who were REALLY alone, from permanent loss. What I got out of it was to get out and reach out to others.... Realizing that it’s just a sad state of mind. I know it’s just an anecdote or platitude, but please know that you’re not REALLY alone... This thread proves it and you know, ultimately, we’re ALL really alone in many ways. I’m there with you, tonight and so sorry to hear about your loss. Love, Bill
My 53 year-old wife died almost 11years ago. Time will help you but remember this; death is how good marriages end. Be well. You will be.
I will pray for you. There is truth in keeping busy. Work, hobbies, other family or friends. All I have found have helped me and loved ones deal with loss. Music is helpful to me too.
One other thing works, and it should be no distraction, but prayer, your faith, the love of God, and for Christians, the blessing of salvation through the gift of a savior, Jesus Christ. We are all part of God's plan, and it is no wonder that it's beyond our understanding.
Blessings of the Christmas season to you.
So very sorry to hear this.. my deepest condolences. May God lay His hands of comfort on you. Please continue to lean on friends and family as much as possible and just take each day one at a time.. God Bless.
Start a new hobby, meet some new people. Over time, you will feel better. Time is the only thing that really helps, but that first Christmas is a tough one.
Keep your chin up. Better days lie ahead, the sun will again return and life goes on.
I’m so sorry bills kid. It’s a rotten thing, I know. My husband died 2 and a half years ago.
Advice? I have no advice that will make it better. Just take it all a day at a time. It is tough because everything changes: your life, how people treat you (they mean well, but...), everything.
If you have faith in God then cling to that. He promises to be close to those in need who turn to Him.
I lost my Dear wife on September 9th. It is very difficult to handle that she is not here with me.
Strange as it sounds, one of my sisters told me that this horrible thing will happen to half of us blessed enough to have found our beloved spouses. I don’t know why but, that stuck with me and helped a little. Maybe the realization that I was very blessed to have shared our lives to begin with.
My children and siblings also are looking out for me. Also, there is work and FR to keep me busy and God to watch over me.
May God bless you and remember that we will all be reunited with our Lord and we will see each other again.
He would want you to live well and be happy.
Be good to yourself and others.
Find new things that make you happy, and do them.
Think of him with love and good cheer.
Life is for the living. Live it all now too.
G-d bless you.
You are not alone. There is wisdom in the replies you have gotten. When my mother passed away in 2006 I asked for prayers from fellow Freepers and they responded. I received great comfort from their replies here on FR. Many others here have also gotten blessings from our online community. I hope you receive the same.
John 9 - Blindness from birth that God might be glorified.
Job - Lost everything that God might be glorified by his patient persistence...Chapters 38 to the end are especially uplifting.
John 11 - Lazarus died and was raised by Jesus that God might be glorified.
Now, as a Freeper friend, I and others will hold you up before God in prayer that your faithful endurance during a time of great personal distress might bring glory to God!
The good news for the believer is he’s been promoted is is now face to face with the Lord.
Even though we know this, we still are faced with that grief, which seems to wrap it’s fist around our heart and firmly jerk it without our control.
Funny thing about that grief....it’s the very same feeling God has every time we sin, or “miss the mark” of God’s Plan. It’s why He refers to sin as Grieving God the Holy Spirit.
The grief isn’t caused by our actions, but rather by a series of events beyond our control. God doesn’t violate our volition, but when we step away from faith in Him, by our own volition, which He is not controlling, it grieves the Holy Spirit in His work in us.
Likewise, in the death of our loved ones, even though we recognize they are probably in a better place, our hearts grieve because we no longer commune physically with them, beyond our control.
There is a time for grieving, and adversity. While Adversity is inevitable in life and in death, stress is optional, through faith in Christ.
Study His Word this Christmas, and let Him guide you through faith and the work of God the Holy Spirit indwelling you, and His Plan will unfold fruitfully.
Time heals but remember time takes time.
Sometime talking to a grief support groups help and make you feel like you are not alone
I wish you comfort