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Hillary Clinton reveals what it's like to be poor in America
The Peoples Cube ^ | 6/9/14 | Opiate of the People

Posted on 06/26/2014 8:41:24 AM PDT by laotzu

Hillary Clinton has served America for decades; in January 1993, she made history as she became the country's first co-president along with her husband, Bill.

After her tour in the White House ended, she answered the call from her adopted state of New York and voluntarily gave up a lucrative career trading cattle futures to act as one of only two US senators from that state.

In 2008, after tirelessly devoting herself to helping Barack Obama become America's best president, she looked forward to retiring to a quiet life in a small cottage somewhere. Once again her country called, pleading with her to act as Secretary of State because President Obama, who would've been better than anybody at the job, was simply too busy to do it himself.

After four extremely successful years in the post, Ms. Clinton was on duty at 3 AM in the White House War Room when a call came in, informing her the extreme Tea Party wing of the Libyan Republican Party attacked the U.S. embassy in Benghazi. The date was Sept 11, 2012.

She immediately ordered the U.S. military to parachute her into the compound so she could take command. The Joint Chiefs balked, saying that the embassy was seven thousand miles away and by the time she got there, the attack would be over.

"What difference does it make?" she said softly, "Get me there now!"

The Chiefs relented. But, as they feared, by the time she arrived it was too late; president Obama's poll numbers were already starting to fall.

Her injuries from Benghazi and her 1996 arrival under sniper fire in Bosnia still give her pain, but the physical scars are not what bother her the most. For, in spite of her decades of selfless service to America, decades in which she never forgot her fellow Americans, she recently revealed the great disappointment in her life: Americans had often forgotten about her. As she recently revealed to esteemed, accredited, impartial, state-approved TV journalist Diane Sawbucks: "We came out of the White House not only dead broke but in debt."

Ms. Clinton went on to reveal the depths of the degradation her family was subjected to, being forced to make speeches for $200,000 a pop and pick up deposit bottles and cans out of the alleys behind expensive hotels (but mostly make speeches for $200,000 a pop) in order to make ends meet.

"It is shocking, simply shocking that America can cast aside its fallen heroes so readily," said another nearly destitute Democrat senator, on his way to promote a documentary movie about the hold right wing billionaires have on the country.

"The Koch Brothers don't care who they hurt!"

"The country wouldn't treat wounded veterans so poorly", said Senator Elizabeth Warren, herself so impoverished she was forced to accept a $525,000 advance for a new book in order to keep vichyssoise and caviar on the table.

"But just because a leader is a civilian womyn lawyer, the patriarchy feels it's OK to treat you like dirt!"


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: hillary; poverty; sarcasm
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1 posted on 06/26/2014 8:41:24 AM PDT by laotzu
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To: laotzu
Give me a F break. These two ars hats are the biggest liars with exception of King Obama.
2 posted on 06/26/2014 8:45:18 AM PDT by Logical me
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To: laotzu

You can take the Clinton’s out of the trailer, but you can’t take the trailer out of the Clintons.


3 posted on 06/26/2014 8:47:03 AM PDT by AZLiberty (No tag today.)
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To: laotzu
to act as one of only two US senators from that state.

this wording is odd... does the reporter/writer not know that each state has "only" two US senators?

4 posted on 06/26/2014 8:48:15 AM PDT by latina4dubya (when i have money i buy books... if i have anything left, i buy 6-inch heels and a bottle of wine...)
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To: laotzu
some_text
5 posted on 06/26/2014 8:48:39 AM PDT by boycott
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To: laotzu

Where did this come from ?


6 posted on 06/26/2014 8:50:11 AM PDT by Eric in the Ozarks (Rip it out by the roots.)
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To: boycott

GMTA. My first thought exactly!! LOL


7 posted on 06/26/2014 8:51:34 AM PDT by RonInNaples
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To: laotzu

Maybe in her world, she sees herself as poor because she doesn’t have billions. Just millions don’t cut it for her.
I would bet that is her mindset.


8 posted on 06/26/2014 8:51:49 AM PDT by Texas resident (The democrat party is the CPUSA)
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To: Eric in the Ozarks

It is from the satire website The Peoples Cube.


9 posted on 06/26/2014 8:54:15 AM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four Fried Chickens and a Coke)
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To: laotzu

Good satire.


10 posted on 06/26/2014 8:56:10 AM PDT by knittnmom (Save the earth! It's the only planet with chocolate!)
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To: boycott

11 posted on 06/26/2014 8:56:21 AM PDT by laotzu
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To: laotzu

LOL - another great one from The People’s Cube


12 posted on 06/26/2014 8:59:37 AM PDT by RightGeek (FUBO and the donkey you rode in on)
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To: Eric in the Ozarks

The People’s Cube is a great satirical website. Really funny stuff, but you have to be up to speed to get a lot of it.

The avatars and the names of the posters are hilarious.


13 posted on 06/26/2014 9:01:25 AM PDT by Walrus (I love the America that used to be ---I hate the America that now IS!)
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To: laotzu
I love the People's Cube.

And yeah, I guess I'm coming around to becoming a fan of She Who Must Not Be Named. I didn't know about the days spent at the soup kitchens, the threadbare coats, the time spent in Calcutta stapling lepers together for Mother Teresa. The woman is just like all of us, "us" being lying Leftist grifters with a two-by-four on our shoulders and our heads in the gilded trough.

14 posted on 06/26/2014 9:01:39 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: laotzu

15 posted on 06/26/2014 9:02:05 AM PDT by red-dawg (<<< click for info on my book.)
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16 posted on 06/26/2014 9:03:18 AM PDT by shibumi (Cover it with gas and set it on fire.)
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To: red-dawg

17 posted on 06/26/2014 9:04:12 AM PDT by laotzu
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To: laotzu
"The country wouldn't treat wounded veterans so poorly", said Senator Elizabeth Warren

They must have interviewed her on the rez, where she buys her firewater tax free.

18 posted on 06/26/2014 9:05:16 AM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: laotzu
Reminds me of the guy in The Jerk who came to Naaman (Steve Martin) begging for help refurbishing the seats on his corporate jet because he was embarrassed when his friends flew with him. . . talk about tone deaf and out of touch . . . sheesh. . . .
19 posted on 06/26/2014 9:05:46 AM PDT by RatRipper (The political left are utterly evil and corrupt)
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To: shibumi

20 posted on 06/26/2014 9:10:48 AM PDT by laotzu
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